To think I can live and support two dc on £20k per year?

[Velvetgarlic]

I am desperate to leave my marriage.

If I divorce my DH we would probably have around £250k each from the sale of our house. I would have to spend practically all of that on a house/flat for me and the dc (teen boy and girl so we need 3 bedrooms).

My DH earns around £40k per year. I get around £1400 net pay per month. Would that be enough for everything? Sorry, I know each situation is individual, but I was just wondering if other people out there were in similar situations and had made it work.

Just at the start of this journey and feeling daunted!

I chucked some rough figures into Entitled.to (£21k gross pay, £50pcm pension, 13 and 15yo and no childcare costs. Home owned outright).

It suggests you would be entitled to the amounts shown in the image, each week, plus the single person discount on council tax.

Benefits should not be a lifestyle choice, they should be a last report.

But if they have DC 50/50 there won't be any maintenance either way.

There's also the possibility that exH will apply for CB of at least one of DC.

OP are either DC entitled to DLA for their SEN? But you need to talk to a solicitor and get your previous child rearing contribution and the impact on your career and pension recognised in the divorce settlement.

Thanks all.

It sounds like it may be doable but will be very tight. I'm lucky in that there is some equity to put into a new property, but then as @Mrsttcno1 has pointed out, that means that I will be entitled to less potential benefits.

Also I was thinking of keeping some money in savings for an emergency fund if anything goes wrong (car/boiler etc) but again, that would affect any benefits.

I know I am in a more fortunate position than many, I'm just trying to work out how the day to day living will work and how i will be able to meet all the costs.

I'm really not sure if I could get a higher earning job at this point, I currently work in the field of mental health, but it's a fairly low skilled job. I have a degree from years ago but nothing since then.

I think I will need to see a solicitor soon as my head is whirling with all the things I need to look at!

In what way would the OP be using them as a lifestyle choice?

She would be using them to top up her insufficient wage, given that she would be a lone parent supporting her family on one wage.

It's only up to 20 if they are still in secondary education. It does not cover university.

With that amount of equity you won't get any help - can you buy something outright? Can you work more hours? Change jobs? Second job? If you are 50/50 you should be only paying for half the kids costs, trying to amicably split May mean you can negotiate slightly more equity in return for taking on some responsibilities for instance. Is he going to be shocked, fight it?

Make sure his pension is included in any divorce settlements. Your earning power, and thus your own pension, have reduced detrimentally due to being the main carer for his children when they were small.

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz oh thank you for doing that! If I was entitled to that rough amount of UC that would be very helpful.

Obviously I would look to increase my earning capacity as well but as (hopefully) a short term solution UC would make a big difference.

You can have £6k in the bank before uc is affected at all. There's a few months (I think 6) where they disregard the sake if your house but it's in your interest to spend most of the money by the time 6 months is up because means tested benefits will be stopped at that point

Of course you can manage, many manage on much less, especially if you have low /nil mortgage rent. Make sure you claim anything you're entitled to for yourself or your DC

@Velvetgarlic the only problem with that benefits calculation is that if you have savings above the threshold which I believe is £6000 then you wouldn’t get that.

But then if you had a pot of money bigger than £6000, you could just use that to subsidise your life in the place of benefits, and once the savings run out you can then apply for UC.

I have managed it but tight, you will get universal credit and child benefit even though you have equity as I did. Good luck and well done for leaving

Just did a brief calculation based on the info you gave..

Based on you having a gross income of 19k, your partner sharing care 50:50, his income 40k and both children being SEN (put in mid care, no mobility DLA as presuming you have claimed already), following came out.

£183.93 pw universal credit

£39.90 pw child benefit

£7.93 pw rate rebate (put in £1500)

£136.20 pw DLA

£47.36 pw child maintenance

• the above assumes you have already claimed DLA for the kids, if not then get on to it, rates may vary.

• calculated on the basis of you being a homeowner, no mortgage. However if you had to rent between leaving the family home and buying a new property you would get some help with this. They won’t count the proceeds of the property for about a year (check it all before proceeding with separation), and as long as you have savings under 5k then your savings aren’t counted.

Check out the turn2us benefits calculator and the gov.U.K. Child maintenance calculator.

Good luck!

The OP won't necessarily have any savings if she needs to use the money to buy a home.

I think you may be entitled to some universal credit. DH left (but then came back) a couple of years ago. I earn similar to yourself, never ended up claiming but with the online calculator I worked out I would have been ok, also with 2 dc. Good luck op.

Hi OP! I'm a single mum on very similar circumstances. 22k a year, own house outright, child benefit and a little maintenance. No UC top ups due to savings. We manage very well. Completely doable.

will your share of the house buy a property outright with no mortgage? if so it will be tight but doable is you are frugal

Savings threshold reduces at 6k. Can't get UC at 16k

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz OP said in previous post that she was planning on keeping some money in savings just in case needed for car/boiler. If those savings exceed the threshold amount that would affect benefits

Doable but tight. Whatever you do, don’t rely on maintenance. However good your relationship may be with your ex, they really show their true colours when it comes to coughing up and the CMS are shite. Anything you get from him should be used for non-essentials and you should be prepared for it to stop at anytime.

With no mortgage you could manage on 20k. It would be tough but not impossible.

I don't feel I live particularly frugally. After bills, groceries and direct debits (pet insurance, gym membership) there's always enough to save a little every month and to do fun things. I do have the one child though.

If you had no mortgage to pay then I think it’s definitely doable. Our living costs with no mortgage are around £1800 but that includes pet insurance and coffees and dinner out etc.