To require a friend to wear a mask in house when she has a cold?

[Saboblue]

I found out from another friend that she’d been slagging me off for making her wear a mask when she had a cold in my house. When she came round I simply said I’d rather not get a cold and asked her to put on the mask and opened the windows. She was very understanding and put the mask on. I thought nothing of it until I found out she was slagging me off about it when she seemed fine to put it on at the time. I’m pissed off about it because what have I said wrong? Why would I want your virus? Put a mask on when you’re ill and in someone’s house!!

Your house and rules but I just wouldn't invite someone round if they are ill - I'm immune suppressed and don't expect anyone to wear masks.
How do you expect someone to have a brew?

Someone coming round with a cold really wouldn’t bother me but if it did then I would just suggest we rearrange. Asking them to wear a mask is pretty pointless as they don’t really work.

During the pandemic, a scientist on r4 described mask wearing and catching germs as like throwing a tennis ball at some scaffolding. You might occasionally hit metal, but mostly the balls will just pass through.

Feel free to insist on masks but expect people to think you’re weird and paranoid and over the top. We need exposure to germs to have a healthy immune system which actually fights off mild viruses. Colds are part of normal life. I do blame the government’s (the world’s!) crazy covid and mask wearing overreaction for an awful lot of terrified people now. So sad.

I would assume someone would stay away if they were properly ill. I wouldn't be that fussed if someone came round with a cold though, and it wouldn't even occur to me to ask them to wear a mask. I spend every day in classrooms full of different groups of 30 germ-ridden children though, so I accept I'm going to get colds!

You know there’s a difference between these first two, right?

They’ve stopped me contracting Covid once in a house for 6 hours with 4 Covid sufferers and just me wearing a mask. It wasn’t immunity either because I got it a few weeks later

I would probably comply to avoid an awkward situation but it would put me off being your friend.

I’m surprised she actually put a mask on and stayed tbh. Like others have said, I would have left straight away if asked to do that.

Masks also aren’t effective against virus. A family GP likened it to using a picket fence to protect against sand blowing. The virus is too small to be shielded by a mask.

No they didn’t., that’s called good luck. We were unknowingly at a party of 100 x 80 plus year olds with covid and not a single person contracted it despite them being all over my children who tested positive for covid the same evening. Covid is just a weird beast sometimes.

Sorry this was mid pandemic and no masks! The oldies thought fuck it and preferred normality with risk than a meeting of masks.

Have you mentioned this to the NHS the staff might not know wearing mask for nowt !

Op its your house but you were being a bit silly and of course people might comment

It's very common in South Asia as a courtesy if you're around other people when you're ill. I dislike her too faced attitude, if she didn't want to wear it she should have just left.

I think it's rude of anyone to call to visit if they are sick.

It may even be just a cold and not covid but who wants to pick it up if it can be avoided.

She shouldn't have come round with a cold - she should have let you know in advance, to give you the option to reschedule. People seem to think a cold is no big deal - well, if you live alone and are young and healthy, then maybe it's no big deal. But I'd be pretty annoyed about it because my kids and dh would likely catch it and everyone would be snotty. Plus I wouldn't then be able to see my mum (immunosuppressed). People have stuff booked - holidays, theatre, whatever that they don't want marred by a cold. It seems really stupid of her to spread it when it's so avoidable.

Even if she's slagging you off, I wouldn't worry - many of the people she slags you off to won't want her cold either.

It's rude and dirty to spread respiratory illnesses without regard for anyone else.

Anyone slagging me off behind my back would not coming in my house again, mask or no mask 😡

Pre covid colds were just a fact of life. You will never avoid getting one especially so if you have children.

Covid made everyone so paranoid and abusive to each other and it's just awful to see.

I'd slag you off too. Actually I would have left if you'd asked me to wear a mask.

OP, do you get out much?

I have a cold at the moment. Low level, entirely liveable with, common cold. Unless someone was immune-system compromised, I just go about my day and would interact as normal. Others are doing the same - it’s just life.

Most people have to get out of the house and just live with the risks/pleasures that brings. If those are the friends you want, you have to be more tolerant.

Its just not really feasible to control what people actually wear and still have them think the same way about you.

I’d have left if asked to do that.

You are joking right? If my friend turns up with a cold I take care of them, not make breathing even harder by forcing them to wear a stupid mask! Some friend you are 🙄

I'm not sure who is right once she is at your house. But she was rude not to ask. I always warn friends I have a cold and ask if they'd still want to meet or wait (and yes, always did pre-covid as well!)

Yeah there seem to be a few "research" posts on MN today. 🧐 Wish they'd just come out and say it. There's a research section for a reason.

Yes, me too. It seems common courtesy not to potentially make your friends I'll if you can avoid it.