To leave my kids alone in the bath?

[Bafftime]

My kids are 5 and 2.5.
I'm a single parent working full time and living in a small 2 bedroom flat.
When my kids go in the bath I use this time to tidy up after dinner, make packed lunches and prepare for bedtime. My flat is tiny so I am never far away from them. I listen the entire time and check on them every few minutes, I'm very tuned into what they are doing which is usually playing calmly and happily together. There are times when one gets upset or they squabble and when this happens I sit in there with them or get them out, but most of the time they're fine.
Am I unreasonable for doing this?

YANBU - using this time to get on with chores is fine, you check on them regularly.

YABU - they are too young to be left alone in the bath regardless of how close by you are.

I did this with my two at the same stage - I was always in and out though from the next room and listening to their chatter. Or I'd ask them to sing songs together so I could hear them both. If it went quiet I'd run back in to make sure all ok.
Seems like even that was a risk - thankfully there was never an incident.

Well done for asking OP and hopefully other parents can take some good advice from this thread.

I've got a 2.5 year old and I would never ever leave her under the supervision of a small child in the bath. Not even for a second. Not worth the risk.

This thread has terrified me which is probably a good thing. Wouldn't leave toddler alone in bathroom but would look at my phone. Won't do that now. No way.

What are you listening for?

Are you relying on your other child to immediately know something is wrong; and then shout?

Because drowning isn't always loud and thrashing... infact it's often not, especially with young children.

No!!!!!

I’m listening for the sound of my children’s constant - and yes I do mean CONSTANT - singing, talking to me, and playing. If there was a momentary break I’d be straight in there. There’s an absolutely minuscule risk of anything happening and if we all lived our lives on minuscule risks no one would leave their bed.

@Bafftime everyone has their Arsehole moments. If they say they don't, then they are lying. I left my kids in the garden to get a drink of water. I can see the garden from my kitchen. I told the kids not to go near the paddling pool. I was saving the water to clean my bins tomorrow. I didn't want to waste the water. Anyhow, you've guessed it almost 5 year old has fallen into the pool (870 litres). She decided to look at her reflection in the water. Luckily, she just got wet and had no injuries.

No I just wouldn't take the risk as hard as it is I just do everything I need to do once kids are in bed. X

www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/toddler-left-bath-very-very-24473759

I bet this mum thought there was a "minuscule" risk of anything happening too, when she left her toddler for less than a minute and she drowned. Utterly terrifying. Why would you even risk it for one second?

Do you walk around with your child on a lead outside? Never let them stand near a window? Under a shelf? Get themselves dressed? All carry minuscule risks. I’m not saying be flippant about leaving your children in water. But it’s very unlikely anything could happen if you are actively listening and aware

@Tonightsthenight91

No I don't walk my child on a lead ffs, how fucking ridiculous is that as a comparison?!

If you cannot comprehend the difference in risk level of leaving a TWO year old unsupervised in a bath, completely out of sight, and allowing your child to walk beside you and not on a fucking lead, then you're beyond any explanation strangers on the internet can give you.

This. I thought this was what the thread was going to be about from the title.

Ditto getting themselves dressed - what an utterly stupid comparison. What's the risk if I hand my toddler her own clothes and say "you try to dress yourself sweetheart" - well, she might put her trousers on her head and her t shirt on her feet. Ok - that's a risk I can live with. What's the risk if I leave her unsupervised in water? She could die.

So yeah - I take risks that don't involve death or serious injury as a potential outcome. I mean. I assumed that was just common fucking sense, but evidently not 🙄

DS is 2.5 and I would definitely not leave him unsupervised. I still have a vivid mental image of the one time he tumbled over in the bath, which is enough to stop me even considering it. What might've happened if I wasn't there doesn't even bear thinking about. Please don't take that risk.

Absolutely not. It's an accident waiting to happen op.

I leave my 6 and 9 year old unattended in the bath together and it’s probably been in the last year or so that I have gradually started reducing the supervision from sitting in the same room with them.

I wouldn’t have left them for more than a few seconds (e.g grabbing a towel) when the youngest was 2.5.

OP you’re going to give me nightmares!

Use bath time as your opportunity to clean the bathroom.

Honestly do NOT do it.

My dad had to resuscitate our next door neighbours toddler because she drowned in the bath.

She was blue, but he managed to save her and the paramedics arrived and took over.

Just like you the mum was doing an errand and her kids were exactly the same age as yours!!

Put the 2.5 ye old in the sink if they fit

I have 18 month old twins and a 3.5 year old and I bathe them all sort of together, one twin hates it so it's short. Once I have both twins out I do start pottering between the room next door and the bathroom. Twins could not be trusted for 10 secs without falling in or out. 3.5 year old stays in for 5 mins longer with me in and out every 10 secs as I deposit twins elsewhere. I'm hyper alert but you do also have to get on with it a bit within managing as much risk as you can. I find the responses here useful but also extreme, like toddlers also die in cars and we all use cars.

@Volvooo children die in all manner of places but a responsible parent does a risk assessment and if possible puts things in place to minimise the possibility of harm. In a car we use appropriate car seats, signs on the windows to altert services in an accident, presumably you drive in a safe manner and maintain your car as standard. A really easy way to keep them safe here is to stay in the bathroom with an infant so they don't slip and drown.

Incredibly dangerous.

If you must be productive (beyond ensuring your toddler doesn't drown which should be enough of a reason to use your time) then clean the bathroom while they're in the bath.

I worked in a coroners office years ago and I can't tell you how many accidental drownings of children happen in baths, particularly people who emigrated from countries without baths and haven't a clue of the danger.

An avoidable tragedy.

Stop it immediately.

Do nor do this ever again. It takes a very short time for a child to drown.