AIBU to get rid of 80% of my "stuff".

[TimeForHygge]

I need online counselling to either support or stop me from what I am about to do.

I want to get rid of 80% of my stuff as in; clothes, shoes, bags, jewellery, hats and other things.

I don't have loads and loads of things, but I have a lot of things I am not using. I also have nice things. For example, Ralph Lauren chinos that are 2 sizes too small that I am keeping for when I fit into them. Not worn them for 7 years! Coloured leather gloves that I am never going to wear. A designer bag that is a bit of a mad colour, that I never use. The one I am most embarrassed about is I have a lot of nice silver jewellery that I have never worn, and it is from a very posh shop, and it is all black. I've cleaned it, then it goes black quickly again.

I buy things that I think are nice, but they are not really compatible with my lifestyle, and I don't wear them. I spend my life at work (uniform), or working out (gym gear), doing chores (jeans, casual trainers and top), and the very occasional meal out (smart casual).

I need to lose weight, but feel it is wrong to hang on to my size 10 stuff. Plus, if I was a size 10, I'd probably feel so fabulous, I'd treat myself.

So, AIBU to get rid of all of this stuff? It feels so wrong. It also feels bad selling things I have paid a lot of money for.

If I was to sell my silver stuff, what should I do with it? It's black. I also have a Cartier ring (makes us sound rich and we are so not!) that my DH bought me years ago before DC, and I have never worn it. What a waste. How can I sell that?

Also, I have some nice rings from places like Swarovski. How do I work out the size so I can sell it?

Am I nuts, or is this the best thin to do? From now on I just want to have less, but better quality. For example, I have a pair of diamond studs and I am now wearing them every day because I just left them in all the time.

I do as well. A trip to the tip with a full car is a treat for me. Unfortunately my husband is a hoarder. We are so illmatched, how have we lasted 40 years?

I'm feeling happy as the dustmen are due first thing tomorrow, just sorted out all the recycling and it is all out ready for them.

What about deciding to sell things like jewellery and bags and gloves that just aren't "you" first? (On Vinted or one of the smarter selling sites?)

Then divide the clothes into categories such as

I Would Wear This If It Fit Me

I Don't Wear This Even Though It Fits Me

I Probably Wouldn't Wear This Even If It Fit Me

then sell what doesn't work for you.

And meanwhile, don't buy anything for a time.

Create space.

I used to have rather a lot of accessories and pride myself on being good at accessorising but I'm also quite a minimalist at heart and often had to force myself to put them on. Jewellery especially just wasn't my thing. I was always taking earrings out asI walked out of the door. Uncomfortable shoes are not my thing either. And I don't give a shit about brands and labels. I just thought I ought to.

Anyway, enough about me.

Get rid of what you know isn't for you.

Consider keeping what might be for you (for now)

And make space for whatever is coming next.

I'm on a decluttering journey and I find it very hard to get rid of things. I have brand new stuff with tags on and it's seems wasteful to give them away. I've now started selling on eBay to make myself feel better about getting rid of stuff.

Re silver jewellery, do you leave it out on display? It tarnishes very quickly if left out, but if kept in a jewellery box it'll stay much cleaner for longer.

Do it.... I discovered Vinted a couple of years ago, and have made probably £500 on it so far. I have sold makeup, toiletries, jewellery, books, bags, clothing, gift sets, shoes, hats, kids toys and games, school revision books etc. Anything that isn't good enough for vinted is donated to charity or the ragbag and moved on quickly.

I get more ruthless each time, so the first wave got rid of a certain amount, then the second wave was even more ruthless, if it hasn't been worn in 2 years its going. I tend to wear the same clothes over and over again, yet have a wardrobe full of stuff that I never wear. I only buy clothes once a year too, so no idea where it all came from . This year I haven't bought any new clothes.

I have kept one nice dress, my black jacket, but have got rid of all old tops, trousers etc that I never wear.

I sell everything cheap and cheerful on vinted with higher prices for anything decent. Decent brands I start high then drop the price gradually if it hasn't sold in a week or so. I now have one dedicated "storage area" with all the selling stuff in it, and not assorted crap over the entire house.

I have sorted about half of my bedroom but, time is an issue with me as I am always working, but it feels so good every time an area looks less cluttered, plus I have a healthy balance in vinted to pay for things and have used it for DD's Christmas and Birthday presents. I recently cleared out the porch and made enough in selling this that I could pay for the new storage I bought for out there. AND most importantly! we have kept it tidy ever since.

Go for it, start out by making piles of

definite
maybe
no

and then do that again in a couple months time and so on and so on

Absolutely do it!!! Have you ever read Marie Kondo’s book “the life changing magic of tidying up”? It talks about how we should only keep things in our life that either give us joy or have an important purpose E.g passports, toilet cleaner!! She suggests that you declutter by category, so for you start with clothes, then accessories bags etc, then jewellery. Take out everything you own in that category from every corner of the house (dirty washing is exempt), and then hold each item to feel if it gives you joy or not. I say go for it and purge all that stuff you don’t use. Sell on Vinted, donate to charity or gift to others.
There have been lots of studies that have shown letting go of stuff actually propels you into action in other areas of your life, so getting rid of that stuff could result in you then losing the weight that you want to!

I have been going through the same! I recently took 5 bin bags of clothes/shoes to charity and want to get rid of a lot more ‘stuff’. You sound like me in terms of buying things you’ll never use/wear. For me, I went through a phase where I kind of lost my sense of style/self and kept buying things that I thought would make me look more stylish/better but actually just didn’t suit me or make me feel good so they’ve sat in my wardrobe untouched. In terms of selling the more high value items, I’ve listed a few things on Vestiare although haven’t had any buyers and their fees are quite large. I think eBay has lower fees. And Cartier offer a cleaning service for your ring that I believe is free so you can take it into a store and they’ll do it!

@TimeForHygge I REALLY want to see a photo of your mad designer bag - in my head it's the bag equivalent of Vivienne Westwood! 🤣🙈

Stop overthinking it and DO it.

Vinted for everything, they have 3 postal options, small, medium and large. It's impossible to fuck up.

I'm in the midst of my third decluttering since I retired. It is so freeing. Got rid of all my work outfits, work bags and shoes. This revved me up to sort through books and jewellery. It all goes to charity as I can't face the hassle of trying to sell stuff. I also put stuff out on the street (household stuff, not clothes) which vanishes almost as soon as I put it out there. I just put a notice on it saying "Free, please help yourself" I live in a poor area so it goes very fast. I once out out a hoover, all in good working order complete as I had replaced it with a cordless one and this lovely man knocked on my door to thank me saying he was broke and needed one and this was like a miracle! Made me feel far better than buying anything ever has.

Sounds a great idea! I struggle to throw anything away although I've been the same size forever, so I tend to put it in the loft and bring it back out when fashion comes round again lol. Get it sold on ebay or vented. Put the money to side then when you lose weight that's your treat money. Sounds nice stuff but if you will never wear it defo get rid

I agree with what @RoseGoldEagle said - when I look at photos, I can see all the stuff in the background that's been decluttered and it's very rare that I miss it. Decluttering is an ongoing process, it'll probably never be finished - you have to address stuff coming in, but there'll always be stuff that's worn out/outgrown/unwanted gifts to declutter. But hopefully less as time goes on and you get better at it.

I have a lovely Tiffany necklace that got broken a few years ago and was languishing in a drawer, but recently took the time to take it back to Tiffany who repaired it for a small fee and returned it so beautifully, with a little dust bag and a box, and now I wear it regularly. Is that an option for your Cartier ring? Cartier Repairs

A good jeweller should be able to tidy it up.

I started my declutter about 8 months ago.

I realised I had far too much stuff in my house. I have baby clothes from 2 children and no plans to have a third. 5 sizes of children’s clothes. Plus things in every women’s sizes 8-18. I can’t remember the last time I was an 8 and I definitely won’t get there again.

I started selling it on Vinted. Everything has gone on it. Unworn jewellery, books, clothes. At one point I had over 600 items on Vinted and have easily made over £700. I don’t have many high value items. And some things I could have got more money for. But it’s clearing out my house and putting a bit extra in my pocket.

it’s nice seeing space and actually being able to find things. I cleared out my eldest ones bookcase at the weekend. Kept all the books he likes. I’ve now got a pile ready to go on Vinted to sell. I have a few boxes with space to store them and when I start to make room in the boxes I start on another area

its 100% worth it. Otherwise I’d still have a full house of things we didn’t use and a bit less in our bank account! Don’t think about what you could have lost. Nothing of nothing is still nothing!

I clean my Tiffany silver jewellery by putting it in boiling water with some fairy liquid, leave for an hour and the black will come off easily with a wipe, get an old tooth brush if there are difficult corners that you can’t get into.

The time it will take to sell and dispatch items one by one might be very disheartening, if what you really want is the satisfaction of a clear deck. By all means sell if the money would be useful, but remember space has a value too.

Another one doing a declutter, it's good for the soul !! I would also recommend selling on Vinted. It's so easy. I split the stuff into categories of sell, recycle, charity shop and tip.

I'm the opposite of a hoarder and find I chuck things and then regret it.

So if you were into something and liked the idea of it at some point I recommend keeping it (as long as you don't hoard completely pointless stuff.)

Having said that I did chuck a lot of my nice charity shop clothes and brought a few nicer things with a 50s theme.

We're moving house 5 years since our last move. I've decided to get rid of anything we haven't used or worn in those 5 years.

I have many sentimental items that I won't part with though, I did that before and regretted it

I hate clutter though, and mess, ornaments everywhere etc

I'm a bag lover so to counteract a house full of bags I only buy a new bag if I get rid of an existing one first.

Nothing I own is worth anything as I'm not interested in designer stuff.

OP - try getting rid of anything you haven't worn/used for 5 years. Also stuff you don't really like. That should be a good start.

I don't advise getting rid of anything valuable or sentimental at this stage

Do it it sections so start with for example jeans. Lay them all out and answer the following questions do they fit? If no get rid by selling or donating. If they fit am I going to wear them? I think if you want a minimalist lifestyle of quality over quantity you need to be ruthless. Stop worrying about money spent. It's gone but you could make some back and buy things you need. For expensive items like your cartier ring find specialist groups on Facebook, don't just go for ebay and vinted there are far too many scammers. Cheap clothes and bags definitely vinted.

Same here. I absolutely hate our house as it is filled with his stuff to the brim. I actually cried when he came back from visiting his parents and brought home a bag full of new clothes. We have 4 wardrobes in the house, each one of them chocka block with his stuff. I only have a chest of drawers. and yet, he seems to think I have more things than him...
We are moving house in 2 days and I have 10 boxes, 1 couch and an arm chair. I deliberately didn't pack any of his stuff as I am hoping he will finally realise something needs to change. The funnies thing of all, I found he owns a copy of "Minimalism" book 😂

@TimeForHygge if you want to keep your silver shiny give it a good clean then store wrapped in a silver cleaning cloth in a box. Stays immaculate.

Selling stuff that no longer works for you for whatever reason is such a positive move! It’s very bad energy to not love and/or use what you have. I used to have a shopping problem and over the past 5+ years I started eBaying and have made thousands (I would estimate around £4k) selling handbags, shoes, jewellery, make up and so many clothes. I don’t miss anything at all, ever, mainly because I never wore it. I have a much more positive relationship with shopping now, and I invest in fewer, better things. I think there are literally no negatives in your plan!

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Goodbye-Things-New-Japanese-Minimalism/dp/0393609030?ref=d6k_applink_bb_dls&dplnkId=2679cd97-0bda-42c8-8567-c5233c372972

I have done this. Life changed, old stuff wasn’t really compatible. I did it in a simple way, just made sure everything was well laundered and took it to a dress agency. Each week i’d go in , and there’d be an envelope of cash waiting. Really simple, felt good.