To think that having a bbq on a Saturday afternoon is perfectly acceptable?

[fabmaccawhackythumbsaloft]

I live on a new build estate and a group of neighbours have for,ed a nice friendship group. On Saturday afternoon one of the group hosted a small bbq , planned from 3-9. There were 10 of us to begin with but people drifted off . We were sat around a table in the garden, the Alexa speaker on the doorstep playing the radio but not loudly as we were all chatting.

At 7pm a bloke appeared at the back gate to say he was trying to get his 1 year old to bed and would we turn the music off. We did but continued to sit in the garden .

At 8 pm a post appeared on the community Facebook page saying that people having bbqs were selfish and had no regard for parents trying to put their little,ones to bed in weather we were not equipped for and with no option to close their windows .

I responded simply saying peaceful enjoyment of your own garden is not prohibited, that yes they did have an option to close the windows and this was the first bbq my friends have had in the 2 years they've lived there , that we weren't exactly having a rave , that we all have or had children, that having kids doesnt give you autonomy to tell others what to do and that if they didn't want to hear other people living on an estate wasnt a good idea.
I also said we were planning on moving inside the house at 9pm
Then the insult's started. I did respond (I know I shouldn't have) saying perhaps if anyone had an issue they could come and knock on the door and discuss it like adults instead of being keyboard warriors.someone
Posted a copy of the councils nuisance noise policy ( which ironically showed night hours to be between 11pm and 7am ! ) this was 8 pm

More insults . Gifs with popcorn . Someone said " i suggest you blah blah blah blah blah .
I lost it . I said I suggest you fuck off before I turn the music back on

Today the whinging post had been removed

What the fuck is wrong with people ? It was a sedate afternoon bbq consisting of 10 people aged 35 ~ 50, not an all night rave !
Aibu ?

You lost the high ground when you were rude.

She means teen boy dickhead behaviour on the open green that I presume she’s witnessed by others already. You know the types trousers under their butt cheeks pants hanging out in warm weather no shirt with their fanny bags or man bags. Might say bruh a lot glorifies weed and songs about hoes and murder.

eventually little kyle will be in mc Donald’s car park at 17 with his 14 year old gf. Those ones.

I misread that it was at your house too! So you went to war on FB with your friend's NDN? I bet they'll love you for that! It wasn't your argument to get involved in, and they're now left to deal with the fallout.

This.
Ours was (presumably still is but I'm not on Facebook anymore) occasionally helpful but used more as a place for the same few moaners to post passive aggressive messages about trivial nonsense and for everyone else to sit back and enjoy the drama.
One of the last posts I remember reading had numerous photos taken from a window of a guy acting "suspiciously" going backwards and forwards to an empty house. Loads of answers from the regular shit stirrers saying things like they were sure they had seen him lurking round the village late at night and to get a group together and go over. Poor bloke was the new owner moving some bits in on his own as his wife was home with their newborn! He hadn't been "lurking" anywhere at night at all. What a welcome to the village. Having your face plastered all over the local group and everyone saying you look like a criminal!

8pm on a Saturday night isn’t even late. I could maybe understand his frustration if it were early hours of the morning, but you can’t expect the world to stop because you’ve got young children.

Oh I haven't . And she said go on, when I said shall I respond ?

The neighbours are not direct , it's someone lives at the back of them with a house that faces another direction

We were true to,our word and went in a 9.

I only live a few doors up the road . If they want to pick a fight they can come to me .

I think it was pointless to engage on FB.

The bloke has a one year old child and the weather isn't helping anyone's mood, he's probably sleep deprived and grumpy, cut him some slack.

You did nothing wrong until you escalated things to a slanging match on SM.

This. I absolutely hate the smell of cheap fat drifting over from our neighbours bbq. I hate the constant doof, doof, doof of someone's music. I don't want to smell it and I don't want to hear it. However I know they are perfectly allowed to do it. If I had not slept properly for days I would definitely be far less mellow about anyone even breathing loudly next door.

No also my neighbours.

As I said they can pick a fight with me. I live a few doors down and it wasn't a next door neighbour. These houses are all designed so the houses all face differently, not a next door neighbour

Behind us somewhere

Sounds very frustrating for your neighbours, but they chose to live on an estate, so what can they expect?

One of the others said ooooh oh we've upset the neighbours and read it out

I wouldn't have complained but I would have been pissed off.

10 people in a garden plus music is a lot of noise. Especially when people are drinking and get progressively louder.

You might have the right to do it but it's still antisocial.

It never ends well when you've had a drink or two and you respond to anything online. The adrenaline kicks in and off you go. Thst was a massive mistake.

My neighbours had a live band until 1am 😂 this weekend. I thought there was a concert nearby

but I’m pretty laissez and cannot be arsed to get worked up about weekend noise. Because eventually you will be the one making loose and hope for the same acceptance.

expecting quiet at 7pm is absolutely ridiculous and they’re obviously unreasonable. Don’t get caught up in the Facebook drama, talk to them in person. Suddenly everyone stops being so lairy when actually having to look you in the face

Especially in a group, egging each other on a wee bit after a few drinks!

The older I get the more I want to move to an island that belongs only me. No music, no alcohol induced shouting, no bbqs, no dogs barking and shitting everywhere, no children screaming on trampolines. Hopefully when the rain returns I'll get something a bit like that.

I have kids they need to learn to sleep noise so I think he is being ridiculous. People's lives don't stop because someone has to put a child to bed a few doors down at 7pm. If my neighbours are having BBQs or parties it doesn't bother me. One often has parties till 3am at the weekend but they do quiten down around 11. He made himself look like a twat publicly.

Weirdly just now two neighbours having a big argument about similar it was a fire pit used in this weather. It was getting very heated and loud.

You were probably a lot louder than you realise and if my neighbour was playing music at any hour of the day I’d be annoyed too.

The barbecue wasn't necessarily unreasonable (I hate them, but if it wasn't particularly loud or smelly, I don't suppose it was doing any harm). But getting involved in a Facebook argument? You might as well have gone on the Jeremy Kyle programme.

You did nothing wrong. People are allowed to talk loudly and laugh in their garden with some background music at the weekend. Certainly until 9/10pm.

He wants silence at 7pm? He is batshit. He need to suck it up or go and live somewhere really remote. 11pm yes, 7pm, you were fine.

Absolute rubbish.

Expecting your neighbours to be silent at 7 pm on a lovely sunny day is what is antisocial here.

If you don't like hearing people in their gardens on sunny days then why move to a new-build estate with the standard postage stamp sized lawns all shoved together?

When the neighbour's child starts nursery/pre-school or if there are older children, perhaps worth warning the school that they may have a difficult parent to deal with.

I'd suggest chilling out if your neighbours playing music at any time in their gardens annoys you. Life is too short to be so unreasonable.