Deathbed marriage?

[MovieCliche]

Watching a movie with my sister where the main character is terminally ill and wants to marry his soulmate before he dies. (Spoiler: He lives in the end and it’s happily ever after)

Got onto the subject of real deathbed marriages and the intentions behind one. I think it’s (one of) the ultimate show(s) of love, a way of saying “we don’t have much time but I want to spend however long it is as your spouse.”

My sister thinks someone getting married knowing their spouse is going to die is just an action done out of pity. That it’s not real love, it’s a perceived duty or obligation.

Thoughts?

It's called "The distance between us" I think, @TotalOverhaul

All sorts of reasons to do it, much easier if you're a bereaved spouse rather than a partner when it comes to sorting out the bureaucracy around dying and death. You're the official next of kin for starters.

The Distance Between Us

@MarshyMcMarshFace @Greyfoot yes, I appreciate a will would not have taken care of the IHT issue, but lack of a will (or even a listing of assets or a filing system) made sorting out the assets a nightmare.

A friend of mine who was terminally ill had two children with her partner. They intended to get married some time, but even when her prognosis was very poor, she was chatting enthusiastically about her big day and waiting until her hair grew back. A lawyer friend strongly advised they get married to guarantee her partner a widowers pension, which would have meant more income to support the children, and recognised next of kin status for the partner. They never did. I felt sad for her, and felt that while her dream day might never have happened, a low key ceremony would have had hugely practical benefits. After she died, I know the woman’s mother was straight on to ask about the Go Fund Me monies raised for going on a medical trial. Luckily the partner had been named as a Co-beneficiary.

Yes, he did this after they married - I didn't think to mention that bit in my post yesterday.
It's a good point for others to be aware of if they are marrying! I imagine it's often the last thing on their mind in 'normal' life or the kind of emotionally charged circumstances of the couple I knew.

I’ve had the privilege of conducting a number of these ceremonies. They are lovely, emotional occasions, a true privilege.