Should 16 year olds get pocket money or get a job?

[Dramatic]

My DD is 16, about to start a full time a level course at college (6th form) me and DH are having a slight disagreement on what money we should give her.

He's saying we should give her money for transport and food at college but nothing else and that if she wants any extras she should get a part time/Saturday job. I think we should still be giving her a bit of pocket money, say around £10-20 per week so she can go out with her friends, buy herself some little treats or whatever.

We still buy all her clothes/toiletries and essentials.

Who is BU?

My DS has just turned 16 (just about to sit GCSE’s), he’s been working part time around school for approx. 1 yr and does some volunteering too. All his pocket money comes from his job. I still pay for all essentials / toiletries, clothes, phone and general snacks and will give him a bit of money on the rare occasion he goes out to cover lunch & activities. He uses his wages for sweets, to cover the cost of games on the xbox or anything additional that he wants.

I started working at 15 (Saturday mornings so didn’t earn much) and worked part time (evenings / weekends) around college, my mum gave me around £80 a month top up until I turned 18 but I was expected to cover all of my own toiletries, clothing and my phone (pay as you go) out of it as well as my travel to & from work.

I don’t think either option you list is unreasonable and I guess it depends on how easily you can afford to give her the extra. A Saturday job is only going to give her £50 a week at minimum wage which isn’t going to go far if she likes going out places with friends on a regular basis. My son only goes out once in a blue moon as he's a bit of a hermit right now so I just give him money as and when needed for a specific outing.

My DD is highly paid. None of her friends did work at 16-18 because the big prize was the A level results, university and subsequent career. No one choosing these young people in her work area gives a flying f about whether they pot washed or not. There are other skills that are valued a lot more and their brains.

Ive noticed very few high flyers who have excelled because they worked at 16. Most are where they are because they have a variety of skills and qualifications.

All of my DCs are high income earners, and all worked at whatever they could find during their teen years. In turn, this led to better jobs at university level, including internships, leading to career opportunities upon graduation. They were chosen for their university jobs and internships because they had a track record of working as well as great grades. You get a variety of skills from a variety of work, and the ability to juggle academic requirements and jobs is always impressive.

Some people are absolutely obsessed with the idea that DC need to be out sweeping chimnies washing dishes for a fiver an hour ASAP. I think there are far better things teens can and should be spending their time doing. They have decades ahead of them to work.

@SeaSwim5
If they have no track record of working all the way through to graduation, they will be extremely lucky to have decades ahead of them to work after that.

My dad paid for my bus fare and all my toiletries. I had two jobs when I was at college for anything else I wanted/needed

My DD juggled a lot with academic work. It just didn’t need to be low level paid work. Some universities don’t recommend it either. In her work no one would care about unrelated basic work. Numerous students and school dc don’t work although some definitely should. There’s not much evidence I’ve ever seen to say very high earners always have paid work in their teens. My DD did what she needed to do for her career. Which was plenty.

I was earning just under 6 figures by 30. I gained chartered membership of a professional body at 33 and that tipped me over 6 figures. And no student loans to pay back.

So there’s one example for you.

My son is about to turn 16 and has free school meals and transport so we give him $100 a month for buying himself snacks and food (school meaps
are awful in America) and also he is allowed to use our card linked to a place to get food on way home. We pay for his activities, clothes etc.

mat this age I’m not really keen on him getting a job as school is a lot.

@mathanxiety Not sure how long ago that was. However DD is way above that! And younger than 33.

Not true at all. My DC did internships relevant to their courses while at uni and then went on to work for one of these companies after graduation.

No dishwashing was required.

@SeaSwim5
There is never a middle way on these types of threads. I know young people who spent all weekends working at Tesco. Did they get that well paid job in the end after university? No. They didn’t have any ambition. Just working in a low level job does not translate to a highly paid job post university at all.

The key to success is being an all rounder. Intelligent, the right degree for career choice, has evidence of suitable work or internships and, hopefully common sense and a personality that comes across at interview. Add in confidence and knowing about the firm you are applying to helps a lot. Spending hours at Tesco isn’t necessary.

My 14 year old works every Saturday as a referree and 17 year old works at a supermarket (has done since 16).
I still give them an allowance of £60 a month this is to cover clothes (apart from shoes, coats and uniform), going out, the gym, presents for their friends, etc

Both of mine worked about 12 hours a week in 6th form. Neither were the type to spend all day long studying and I think they both gained confidence and maturity from their jobs, as well as earning some money. Both started looking at 16 but it does take a while to find a job as many employers don’t take 16 year olds. They both took extended leave before and during their A levels and then worked much longer hours in the summer holidays. I still paid for most essentials and a few treats, they both saved up for uni and spent some of their wages on clothes and days out / holidays. I really didn’t apply any pressure on them to get pt jobs, they wanted to! I don’t think it had a negative impact on their A level grades, they achieved their expected grades and had time to complete their homework. I do think it helps with independence if they are off to uni post A levels.