Should 16 year olds get pocket money or get a job?

[Dramatic]

My DD is 16, about to start a full time a level course at college (6th form) me and DH are having a slight disagreement on what money we should give her.

He's saying we should give her money for transport and food at college but nothing else and that if she wants any extras she should get a part time/Saturday job. I think we should still be giving her a bit of pocket money, say around £10-20 per week so she can go out with her friends, buy herself some little treats or whatever.

We still buy all her clothes/toiletries and essentials.

Who is BU?

It very much depends on the child. I worked in McDonald’s while doing A levels in the 90s and it definitely affected my grades, but many friends were not affected. On the other hand it did give me some skills and taught me I never wanted to work in fast food.

dd is 11 and has asd and finds schoolwork tough, she also finds life hard generally and it takes her forever to do the basics. I can’t imagine I’d be encouraging her to find pt work at 16! But it’s still a way off.

I suppose this is another slight issue, we live on the outskirts of a small town and don't have restaurants, theatres etc so there are very limited opportunities for a 16yo to find work. Plus terrible public transport.

In that case, let her loving pappa find her a job. And ferry her to and from said job when the public transport is being terrible.

Of my 6th form year, only a few had jobs. Lots of us volunteered but few had paying jobs.

It's increasingly hard for 16 year olds to get hired. More places are asking for 18+. Even for volunteering now. Local FB page is full of it at times, looking for jobs for 16 year olds and having little success. And I was in a charity shop where a 16 year old came to ask about volunteering to be told they don't take under 18s

My DD is also 16 and starting A levels, also in the NE. She isn't bothered about getting a job just yet and spends minimally so we will continue to support her. She doesn't get a set amount of spending money per week or month but I reimburse food, bus fares, entrance fees etc and buy her clothes (at her request) as it isn't a huge sum. She also has her own money to spend as she chooses.

I have 2 x 16 year olds living locally who babysit my DD11. Not exactly onerous work to braid hair and watch Netflix. They can earn £30 -£35 for one evening. So actually there are ways of earning some money even if you live in a small place with limited shops and restaurants.

Ideally I think a job is a good idea at this age. It gives them a glimpse into the working life and something to put on a CV, as well as the satisfaction of earning for themselves. However it depends on the circumstances and the child.

At 16 my youngest wasn't ready for one - she suffered hugely in the pandemic, was anxious and depressed and had low confidence.

She did a vocational course at college for which placements were needed. Initially these were voluntary work but I was surprised when the tutor said most students get a paying job in the field in their second year.

I didn't think she would be able to do this but in the summer of the first year she did, although left it later as she felt overwhelmed, but got another job elsewhere in the new year. She's 18 now and still works there part time. It means she has actual work experience in the area she is qualified in, as well as previous voluntary experience. And earns enough that we don't need to give her money for clothes, entertainment etc.

But I think any work experience is positive.

Both of mine had jobs at 15, couple of days a week in a local cafe. It does them good dealing with the public, and something to put on their CV.

I worked at 16 and my studies badly suffered as a result and I didn't get the grades I needed to get into uni. It wasn't a Saturday job though it was after college until midnight and had to walk a long way home after and a long way to college in the morning so it's a bit different. When my kids are in education full time I won't make them work if they don't want to, the way I see it they are working 5 days a week already and I wouldn't want to do more than 5 days. I don't think it breeds a bad work ethic provided that they are studying and putting effort into coursework etc.

I don't think either attitude is necessarily wrong though, maybe compromise and link the allowance to targets like getting coursework done before deadlines.

Our son didn’t have a job whilst doing A levels. His timetabled hours, plus travel time/homework/study time was about 35 hours a week. With sports,socialising and learning to drive once he was 17, he was busy enough. He did work over the summers between year 11 and 12 and year 12 and 13. Throughout college we paid for everything. We gave him an monthly allowance for lunch and socialising.

He has just finished his A levels and has been working over the summer before he goes to uni. He’s got a part time job lined up close to uni so he’ll work part time at uni as long as he can fit it in. If not he’ll just work in the holidays.

Thinking about it in my son's friendship group on his Btec the only one of them who worked regularly during term time was the one who got the lowest grades.

@Dramatic it’s a false economy to make her work in addition to her studying because it is likely to compromise her ability to achieve top grades. I know many (most?) MNers will disagree but - if you can afford it - I think you should continue to fund her lifestyle until after this course.

We funded 'needs' and they funded 'wants'.

So I'd cover decent non branded clothing and shoes. If they wanted labels they could make up the difference.

I fund essential transport (to college) and they fund transport to social activities.

I buy food and cook for everyone. If they have reasonable requests they go on the shopping list. Extras they can walk to the shops and buy themselves. They can take packed lunches or buy themselves lunch.

This meant our youngest who really liked everything funded for him (who wouldn't) wasn't under pressure to get a job.

But once he realised that he wasn't going to be able to have the designer shoes he wanted and weekend spending money with friends he got a job pretty quickly.

We didn't tell him or our others to get a job, it just slowly dawned on them.

I think it is important to do focus on college but to get a summer job

Mine has had jobs since 16, now 17.5, he got straight As in his N5 and highers so was able to fit it around his studying. I think kids should be working from 16 but I’d still give them some money.

There's evidence this is the case, so unless you have a super high flier then I would, like you, be wary

For me there was the added complication that both my kids were studying and went onto study performing arts subjects that required a lot of extra curriculars (dance classes, piano lessons, show rehearsals etc etc)

She should get basic pocket money as you suggest whilst still in full time education at this age. But in return for doing her chores round the house (and homework?)
Then if she wanted to supplement that with a weekend job it’s up to her, but not essential.

My DGCs parents don’t qualify for Child benefit. The oldest (16) found herself a p/t job at the beginning of the year, and just got great GCSEs, mainly 9s. No financial need for her to work, both parents high earners, but she feels pride in earning her own money. A strong work ethic plus some job experience, when added to good academic results, whats not to like?

We pay for specific stuff for our 17 yo, he's at college so I pay for travel and lunch. He's just going into his 2nd year. He buys all his clothes and luxury stuff plus for going out as he has a really high paid job around college. He has worked since he was 12, it's never affected his schooling and is now relevant to his college course so is fine.

DS2 is 15 and has a Saturday/holiday job. He pays for luxury clothing (specific items he wants not needs) and going out with his mates. We pay for everything else. I would expect them at 16 to be working weekly even if just a Saturday. Personally if they cannot manage a few hrs work plus their A levels then they are on the wrong course. Some degrees don't allow/encourage students to work as well which would be a different scenario.

My DS1 has worked all the way through school and 1st year college, he got the highest mark in his class for the 1st year results, so it's just anecdotal isn't it.

I wouldn’t ‘expect’ dc s to get a part time job whilst still in full time non- advanced education. There’s a reason that child benefit and tax credits are still paid ( to those parents who qualify) for this age group. They are dependants. So I’d still just give them money. If they wanted a Saturday job, I would be fine with that as long as it didn’t affect their studies - which have to be the ultimate priority.

Our supermarket is not keen on hiring them at 16. Our department starts at 5.00 and 6.00am, (online pickers) That's too early for a 16 yr old and they have to come in later, also they won't just hire them for a Sat, they want both Sat and Sunday, which means the 16 yr olds get no break, apart from term times when they are expected to help out more. Checkouts aren't too keen either because they need an adult member of staff to constantly supervise sale of alcohol, etc.
I do feel a bit sorry for our younger members of staff, most of them look exhausted.

Both unless you are really tight financially.
At 16 they have 50 years of work ahead. I much prefer that they work hard at school and have fun. A very small part time job is good for them in the sense of learning about work.
Time to teach her budgeting so I suggest you stop buying all clothes and toiletries and start a proper allowance to cover them. Added to money for travel, lunches and socialising.
If she gets a job it's a bonus.

It definitely does depend on circumstances, if transport is an issue and lack of jobs etc then that is tricky. We live in a busy city so a fair amount of work around.

Having 35 hrs traveling/college/studying isn't really loads IMO. That's basically 9-4 every day including study. My DC do sports also but most of the boys in their teams also work around school/college/sports. Different people have different capabilities, motivation and opportunities so it's not one size fits all.

Yeah, it's hard for 16yos to get paid work now. My 16yo will be in college five days, and at an extra curricular 8.30-5 on Saturdays, so only had Sundays and evenings.

Almost everywhere she's looked either wants 18yos, or people who can offer either more hours or more flexibily. Which pretty much leaves McDonald's, with the result that it's super competitive - she and half her mates have been rejected from there.

The jobs my friends and I did as 16yos were either as "Saturday girls" just doing 6-8 hours in a shop, or cash in hand fruit picking and packing. These jobs now seem to want full timers, or at least 16hrs minimum either expectation of overtime.