Should 16 year olds get pocket money or get a job?

[Dramatic]

My DD is 16, about to start a full time a level course at college (6th form) me and DH are having a slight disagreement on what money we should give her.

He's saying we should give her money for transport and food at college but nothing else and that if she wants any extras she should get a part time/Saturday job. I think we should still be giving her a bit of pocket money, say around £10-20 per week so she can go out with her friends, buy herself some little treats or whatever.

We still buy all her clothes/toiletries and essentials.

Who is BU?

As your daughter is still in education I believe she should still receive an allowance from you, most kids do. A part time job is an extra and it may not last. If parents are in straightened circumstances and there is no spare cash, it's a different matter of course but you haven't said that.

My kids always worked, paperround before school and then hospitality.
My youngest is 26 now.
That being said, I do think it's alot harder for them to get a job now under 18, unless they know someone who will employ them

I think they should have a p/t job but finding one is easier said than done. My DD tried loads bur even lots of cafe/coffee shop places now serve alcohol which rules out employing them.

She works all day on a saturday, we pay for her mobile phone, £20 a week for lunch at college, we drive her there and back (rubbish bus service), she js learning to drive as 17 now (we pay for lessons). She uses her wages for nails, make up, things she wants. We cover what she needs. She also gets £100 a month pocket money and has household chores to do to earn that.

Our 17yo doesn't have a job yet (she's applied) so we give her an allowance. When she gets a job we'll review how much she gets but I didn't get a PT job till the summer between school and uni (and had passed my driving test so could get myself there) so am fairly relaxed about it. She's going to do her lifeguard training in the Easter so will hopefully get a job after that.

@Dramatic i don’t think either of you are wrong per se but more different parenting styles maybe? My kids aren’t 16 but my intention is to fund them until they are off to uni and then expect them to get a part time job for their social lives whilst providing them shelter and essentials.

I’m a firm believer in them getting a Saturday job if they can. My two both did and still managed good A level grades.

How about babysitting? We used to hire a 16 year old who lived down the road to babysit for us (kids were primary age so not babies, and her mum was at home for back up, not that she ever needed it)

Yes I believe we should support our children financially while they are in education, until they are reasonably 'set up', but how much depends on our income.

My son got a Saturday job at fourteen! That really is a bit young and there was never any pressure from us but he saw an advert and wanted to do it. He also worked there part time in the holidays right up until after he was 21. It did him a lot of good and he enjoyed it. However the money he earned was his, he still got his allowance.

I never did anything until I had finished school, managed to enjoy myself on very little :). My late husband worked for an off licence and when he passed his driving test at 17, did deliveries for them in a van. He did that job in the sixth form and as a student until he was 22. I didn't know him then, pity because it would have been nice to have a boyfriend with a bit of cash :-).

@LBFseBrom I agree that it depends on income I only spoke of what I plan to do. I have worked since I was 16 and whilst it didn’t do me any harm I found uni years hard as I had to support myself completely and worked 4/5 days a week. Want to do different for my kids whilst still instilling in them the importance of working and managing your own funds.

My 17yo DD has worked since she was 15. She had a job at a doggy day care first, & then moved to a supermarket when she was 16.

she dors 10 hours a week, & it does not impact her studying. She enjoys it & her confidence has increased greatly.

I also give her some pocket money.
she pays for her own clothes, car insurance & toiletries

works really well for us.

her 14yo sister is sick for a job, but knows she’s just going to have to wait

Can you afford it? Does she help out at the house?

Personally I'd probably give her £20/week and she works out what to spend it on. She can pack a lunch and save money, or buy stuff throughout the week. Good to start to learn how to budget. I pack a lunch for work myself so wouldn't see any issue expecting a child to do the same (my 8/12 year olds pack their lunches for school)

I'd also expect she gets a summer/Christmas job to save up for the rest of the year.

My parents stopped paying for extras when I was 12 and got my first babysitting jobs (the 90s were different!) but they couldn't really afford to and it wasn't difficult to make enough for me to do most of what I wanted to do.

School/college may have a guide eg no more than 8 hrs a week was dc’s sixth form.
My dc worked in McDonalds which was very local and paid above minimum wage. She didn’t work too much and still came out with top grades. It definitely did her good in terms of dealing with customers/manager etc. Problem is lots of jobs aren’t set shifts like a Saturday job. Friends did waitressing, June football ref, lifeguard, kids after school club. The skills gained were useful for university applications in some cases.
If degree apprenticeship is on radar than they look for ability to juggle work and study they are ultra competitive.
We did give dd allowance too £50 a month plus bus fare and bought her clothes etc. we also paid driving lessons.

I’m with your husband on this. Both mine worked through GCSEs and college

No jobs near us. Big village has few opportunities 3 miles away and DC know the owners of the cafes and shops so employment very limited and we would have to ferry dc to the job. Some jobs in supermarkets 8 miles away. So no, they didn’t work. Neither did their friends. Holiday “work” ended up being volunteering where they learnt loads! By then they could drive though. Jobs for 16 year olds are not always easy to find.

The job is essential imo.
When the time comes to get a real job after university or when she leaves school, her work experience will be vital.

A weekly allowance should be just about enough for walking around money. Money for food while in school amd for transport should be a given. But I agree with your H that any more should be earned.

I did not give my DCs pocket money at all as teens and they all had PT jobs or did loads of babysitting, on top of school sports, and they all thanked me when they got to university and found they could juggle all the demands on their time because they had practiced that throughout their teen years. They had also perfected the fine art of shopping second hand and clearance rails. They had several references available when they were looking for PT jobs while in university, and a long list of previous employment (and also volunteering) on their CVs when looking for jobs after graduating.

Nothing beats work experience for putting you ahead in getting roles as a young adult.

My view has always been that as long as DC are in full time education, it is our role to support them. A levels are difficult and I would far rather them be focused on that (as well as things like sport and socialising) than washing dishes for £5 an hour.

Clearly if she wants Prada handbags and skiing trips, I wouldn’t fund that, but I think as long as she is working hard at her A levels, that is her job and it’s perfectly reasonable for you to find reasonable expenses.

It depends on the child, and your finances. For my two, I wanted academic work and extra curricular to be their job at that age. They had small amounts of pocket money for day to day, phone and travel paid, and extra money to pay for nights out.

I worried a bit that they wouldn't develop a work ethic, especially as Covid prevented them from getting Summer jobs, but they both got jobs while at uni as well as keeping on top of academic work. They just weren't ready at 16. Some of their mates were, but they weren't.

Mine got a bus pass & phone paid
they also got the family allowance paid into their account.
they both had part time jobs as well.

Let her study for her A levels in leave and give her pocket money

I was working in a butchers from age 13 for a few hours on a Saturday. Cleaning down the meat locker 😂

After that I worked at Woolworths all day Saturday and Sunday and one evening shift from 6-9 stocking shelves from age 17.

And I was giving my mum £50 a month house keeping out of my £300 a month take home.

Didnt impact my GCSE's or A-levels or Degree.

It taught me that if I want things, I have to work for them and nothing comes for free.

Kids are far too soft these days.

I’m pretty sure A levels now aren’t any harder than they were in the 90s, where I did 4 at 2 different schools whilst not living at home and having to work to pay rent.

I know the housing market is clobbered now, but working (a lot) from 15 allowed me to buy driving lessons, car and insurance at 17 and a house at 19. It gave me a work ethic that saw me climb the ladder without a degree far further than would usually be expected.

A job as a teen isn’t just about earning money. It sets you up for life.

Pay her as a cleaner. This way she gets a decent reliable slug of income and you get your house regularly cleaned.

Ps i work in a large corporate and the most successful young grads i see tend to be the ones who started working shops or pubs as teens. Jobs are really good for kids. A-levels are no more demanding now than they were, a teenager should be able to fit in a couple of shop or pub shifts or some babysitting.

I don’t agree. There are some parents who spend tens of thousands a year on their DCs’ education (hundreds of thousands overall).

That is not affordable for our family, but in my view the least we can do is give our DC money to socialise, go to the gym and relax to allow them to focus on their studies. It adds up to a pittance in the grand scheme of things.

Some people are absolutely obsessed with the idea that DC need to be out sweeping chimnies washing dishes for a fiver an hour ASAP. I think there are far better things teens can and should be spending their time doing. They have decades ahead of them to work.