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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend said our holidays are boring

361 replies

SusanandMidge · 31/08/2023 14:50

My friend and her husband love travelling and go on about 4 holidays a year. This year they've been to Egypt, India and Japan and are planning a trip to Croatia next month,
We prefer to holiday in the UK. Just throw everything into the car, no airport security, worrying about losing passports, delayed flights etc. We genuinely enjoy driving around places like the Lake District, Devon, Wales etc., stopping off at nice villages, chilling out in the garden of rented cottages with a glass of wine and a book, pottering up to the local pub for dinner and all that.

Last night, after a couple of drinks, my friend asked me why we go on such 'boring' holidays. I just said I wouldn't really enjoy the holidays she goes on but each to their own. She started persisting, saying 'don't you want to see the world' and so on. I pointed out that when we were younger we went to the States, Australia and lots of European countries. Then she said yeah but that was years ago, and we should 'treat ourselves' to a few nice holidays.

We're about to head down to Cornwall for a week, but her comments have kind of ruined it. I really don't want to go on long haul holidays and was content with our UK holidays but now just feel like everyone thinks we're boring and unadventurous. AIBU.

OP posts:
wildlifeobserver1 · 31/08/2023 15:41

We're about to head down to Cornwall for a week, but her comments have kind of ruined it.

How have her comments ruined it? Are you not going to enjoy it just because someone else has a different opinion?

NeverGuessWho · 31/08/2023 15:41

CherryMaDeara · 31/08/2023 15:02

Loved my UK holiday.

Where did you go?
That looks amazing!

Cherrysoup · 31/08/2023 15:43

Why do you care about her opinion? You enjoy what you do, so why worry? I’d have told her I didn’t require her opinion, nor was it of any interest to you.

BHRK · 31/08/2023 15:45

I think your holidays sound deathly dull but I’m not sure I’d have told you! It’s none of her business where you holiday. If you like UK holidays then go on them..

Flakey99 · 31/08/2023 15:45

You’re both BU. However, I don’t understand why your friends opinion should affect your holiday plans. If you enjoy it, crack on.

I wouldn’t choose to holiday in the U.K. because it’s too overcrowded for me. I also wouldn’t want your friend’s version of travel because again, it sounds like she’s doing it within a tour group, which I don’t enjoy either. There’s often one loud ‘know it all’ in the group. 😂

Whenever we’ve gone on an adventure type holiday, we go alone and the company we use books a guide and a driver for us at each destination and we’ve really enjoyed the experience.

StillWantingADog · 31/08/2023 15:45

Yanbu.

I got some funny looks when I told friends about our holiday driving and cycling round the Netherlands. Was great, even the weather, but clearly not their cup of tea.
I did plenty of exotic travel in my youth, these days don’t really have the inclination or funds!!
though I think it’s increasingly very hard to have a high quality holiday in the UK without spending a fortune.

LunaNorth · 31/08/2023 15:45

Next time, smile sweetly and change the subject, while thinking, “I don’t give a fuck what you think.”

Canyousewcushions · 31/08/2023 15:46

Her comments are really mean!!!

We also choose holidays like that and really love them. We might do a big overseas sometime but to be honest all the rushing about and travel hassle doesn't appeal right now, plus stay cations are better for the environment too. And the UK is amazing, I'm always stunned by the number of people I meet who have never travelled within their own country.

RedVanYellowVan · 31/08/2023 15:46

This is one reason I'm rarely in touch with a relative. Always going on about their cruises etc and clearly looking down on our UK holidays which are based on watersports and mountain climbing.

I also know a family who went to Spain this year, kept saying how wonderful it was going to be - far from the usual tourist spots - then admitted they'd spent most days in their hotel rooms with the aircon on as it was too hot. The DC played computer games for hours.

OP just ignore them, Cornwall is one of my favourite places and what you like doing on holiday really isn't anyone's business.

saraclara · 31/08/2023 15:47

My choice of travel style is independent solo backpacking in places where the culture is very different from home. But I don't for a moment consider it to be superior to someone else's choice of UK self catering (which we also did plenty of in the past as a family) or sunning themselves on a Spanish beach for a week.

Holidays are for doing what works for you and makes you happy, whether you're looking for relaxation or adventure, and at home or on the other side of the world. Do have a great holiday in beautiful Cornwall and ignore your friend.

NorthWestThree · 31/08/2023 15:47

But who cares what people think. I wouldn't enjoy a holiday just lying by a pool doing nothing, so I don't go on those holidays.

I wouldn't want to spend thousands and thousands on just one week, I'd rather have several cheaper holidays throughout the year, days out, mini breaks etc. I have a friend who does barely anything with her kids all year as she says she can't afford it & frantically saving for their all inclusive week in Greece once a year. I couldn't like like that but I wouldn't tell her than cos she wants to live like that and how I feel is completely irrelevant

Beezknees · 31/08/2023 15:47

Who cares what other people think.

I loved an all inclusive when DS was young, Mumsnetters are so snobby about AI it's unreal. Didn't bother me, they're great for kids.

AllOfThemWitches · 31/08/2023 15:48

CalistoNoSolo · 31/08/2023 14:56

Your holidays are my idea of hell tbh. Not so much the format, as I love a self catering holiday, but the places you go. Your friend is a bit rude to be so forthright about her opinion, but you are being U to be so upset that its ruined your Cornwall trip.

How dramatic 😆

Who cares what other people think of your holidays?

Glittertwins · 31/08/2023 15:49

I love a lazy AI holiday. We spend most of our time run off our feet so we like to do as little as possible on holiday!

Noicant · 31/08/2023 15:49

Ignore, it’s your holiday and you should enjoy it.

TerfTalking · 31/08/2023 15:50

Please don't care what she thinks, we have no much beauty in this country. Covid was a real eye opener for us, we've been all over the world and when the country reopened and our trips abroad had all been cancelled, I thoroughly enjoyed visiting the highlands of Scotland, Cornwall, the Cotswolds and the Lakes with no airport delays, no journeys taking a whole day to get there and another to get back and enjoying the magnificent food and countryside we have on our doorstep.

Waffle78 · 31/08/2023 15:50

There's plenty of lovely places on holiday to visit. Ask her if she's been to as many parts of the UK as you have. You are also supporting British buisnsses. You do what makes you happy. You don't have to go to a hot country to enjoy your holiday.

The holiday my kids enjoyed the most was staying in a cottage at Ravenglass and going on the little railway nearly every day with a picnic. The one day we never we walked up to muncaster castle for a day there and see the owls. We found loads of different walks to go on and explored different places. We did have a couple of days of drizzle. But we had waterproofs so was fine.

Helpmepleaseimbusy · 31/08/2023 15:50

Your friend is a rude cunt. I wouldn't be her friend for much longer if I'm honest

doroda · 31/08/2023 15:51

FullFatPhil · 31/08/2023 15:40

"Oh stop it. Being vegan doesn't automatically reduce one's carbon footprint. And even when it does, it's not going to offset multiple flights each year."

You missed the kids and dogs. You stop it. Nothing more boring than dragging carbon footprints into it when you've fuck all info other than where they holiday. Yawn 🥱

Guessing you're a frequent flyer and I've hit a nerve 😂

gogomoto · 31/08/2023 15:51

Your holidays your choice but they do sound a bit boring to me. Nothing wrong with a U.K. holiday but if you are fortunate to be able to go on more than one I wouldn't want to stick to the U.K. Cornwall in particular is so expensive, I looked myself and it would have been £1500 self catering (for 4) plus food, entry fees etc whereas instead we aren't taking the (twenty something) kids and going ai for £1200

Also if you choose U.K. holidays don't then moan about the weather!

MadamWhiteleigh · 31/08/2023 15:51

I think I’d make a nice, snide comment about her carbon footprint in retaliation.

tutturr · 31/08/2023 15:51

The immature/ horrible / judgemental part of me thinks you're boring and a bit sad to only holiday in the UK. I would also think you're not very worldly. I would probably think you're not very cultured/ educated and a bit simple. I would most likely feel like I'm better than you for having travelled more and being more adventurous and cultured.

But these are just nasty thoughts I have and that some people would have. My nasty side would also like to hang out with you because your inadequacies ( only holidaying in the UK can be seen as an inadequacy ) make me feel better about myself.

I would assume your friend probably thinks she's much better than you and feels good about herself in your presence because she's the worldly important, well travelled friend and you're the ' boring simple ' friend.

What I've written is disgusting and it's not really how I ACTUALLY feel. You can holiday however you like and I don't have the right to judge you on that. But be aware that there are some horrible people who will think this way. But remind yourself that they're the problem and not you. Don't let this ruin how you like to spend your time. It's so shallow to judge someone on something like this.

As for your friend, well, she's shown you who she is and what she thinks.. hopefully she just meant it in an innocent way and not the evil way I describe in my post.

Stokey · 31/08/2023 15:52

I voted YABU because you shouldn't let other people's comments ruin your holiday. Each to their own.

Personally I'm more of an abroad holiday as I love the sun and different food but wouldn't want to do a super organized holiday like your friend.

It's kind of crass to boast about your holidays. For a start in the current climate, lots of people can't afford to go abroad. Your friend sounds like a bit of a tool.

Pinkpots · 31/08/2023 15:52

Your friend is just rude. Everyone knows the proper holiday etiquette is to say something positive about someone’s choice of holiday destination even if you wouldn’t go there if they paid you.
”That sounds fun with good nightlife ” mad Shagaluf type place
” That sounds really lovely I bet the views are spectacular ” long distance hiking/ climbing mountains
“That sounds lovely and restful” somewhere even the elderly would find dull.
”The kids are going to love that” Disney / Theme Park or similar

FabYouLus · 31/08/2023 15:53

Where you enjoy spending time is nobody else's business! Perhaps she was trying to help you see what you might be misisng? Perhaps she was just being opinionated and lacks empathy? Doesn't matter. You do you, and love it!