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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Friend said our holidays are boring

361 replies

SusanandMidge · 31/08/2023 14:50

My friend and her husband love travelling and go on about 4 holidays a year. This year they've been to Egypt, India and Japan and are planning a trip to Croatia next month,
We prefer to holiday in the UK. Just throw everything into the car, no airport security, worrying about losing passports, delayed flights etc. We genuinely enjoy driving around places like the Lake District, Devon, Wales etc., stopping off at nice villages, chilling out in the garden of rented cottages with a glass of wine and a book, pottering up to the local pub for dinner and all that.

Last night, after a couple of drinks, my friend asked me why we go on such 'boring' holidays. I just said I wouldn't really enjoy the holidays she goes on but each to their own. She started persisting, saying 'don't you want to see the world' and so on. I pointed out that when we were younger we went to the States, Australia and lots of European countries. Then she said yeah but that was years ago, and we should 'treat ourselves' to a few nice holidays.

We're about to head down to Cornwall for a week, but her comments have kind of ruined it. I really don't want to go on long haul holidays and was content with our UK holidays but now just feel like everyone thinks we're boring and unadventurous. AIBU.

OP posts:

BubziOwl · 31/08/2023 16:11

PuttingDownRoots · 31/08/2023 15:08

Location doesn't make a holiday. You can go to the Caribbean, drink just Coke and standard international lager, eat chicken nuggets and chips and only speak English while barely moving off your sunbed. Or go thr Lake District, try a range a food, visit historic sites, try watersports, and strike up conversation with people from around the world.

This post hits the nail on the head!

MaidOfSteel · 31/08/2023 16:11

Do friends speak to each other like that nowadays? I've got more manners than to tell anyone, let alone a supposed friend, that I think their holidays seem boring! Your 'friend' isn't much of one, IMO.

MumblesParty · 31/08/2023 16:11

ignore her OP.

I travelled a lot in my youth, saw some amazing places, had some incredible experiences, and still go abroad once a year with the kids (although they’re 18 and 14 so those days are numbered). I loved travelling, wanted to see as much of the world as I could, and don’t regret any of it.

But now I’m in my 50s, and I have definitely lost some of the love of foreign travel. I’m done with sitting for hours at airports, cancelled flights, getting lost in places I can’t speak the language, trying to adjust to different cultures, driving on the wrong side of the road etc.

I would probably quite happily stay in the UK from now on, maybe visiting France sometimes . There are so many beautiful places to see that don’t involve flying!

MammaTo · 31/08/2023 16:13

I voted you ABU because who cares what other people think, as long as you enjoy yourself then who’s assed.

FieldInWhichFucksAreGrownIsBarren · 31/08/2023 16:13

I think your holidays sound lovely. I love to travel abroad but your friend was rude and would do well to keep her small minded opinions to herself.

Aposterhasnoname · 31/08/2023 16:14

Well if her comments have “ruined it” then you have to ask if you genuinely enjoy it. I often see comments about holidaying in the uk is better because xyz. None of them ruin my holidays (currently in Turkey) because I genuinely love them.

Maltaw · 31/08/2023 16:16

I don't understand why her comments have ruined your holiday? I can understand thinking she is rude and snobby (because she is) but how can a comment like that ruin a whole holiday? That seems dramatic.

There are always going to be people who think your way of doing things is wrong surely you can't be that surprised by it.

MitchellMummy · 31/08/2023 16:19

There's much more to do in the UK if the weather is bad. No airports. No flights. You can do as much sport, culture, lazing around or whatever. I love UK holidays. Many people who go abroad do it for the 'Insta' rather than because they want to go. A tick list - how many countries you've visited. Enjoy your holiday! Do not give a thought about what your 'friend' thinks!

drpet49 · 31/08/2023 16:19

You sound dramatic OP. Or maybe her words have some truth to them and hit a nerve?

FullFatPhil · 31/08/2023 16:21

"You referenced your last 8 flights, I think I've hit the nail on the head honestly"

Mate, give it a rest. You've not hit a nerve and I've been on a lot more than 8 flights. Much as that is your intention.

It'll take much more than "and how do you justify your carbon footprint hmmm?" to hit a fucking nerve here 🤣

Spirallingdownwards · 31/08/2023 16:23

Its not for her and hers aren't for you but I fail to see why her comment has ruined your holiday. You are still having the holiday you want. That hasn't changed.

suckrifice · 31/08/2023 16:34

There's much more to do in the UK if the weather is bad.

What on earth do you base this on?

irregularegular · 31/08/2023 16:34

I think she was being very rude. Everyone is looking for different things from a holiday and if you are happy with your holidays then that's all that matters. I think it would have been fine for her to ask whether you ever considerered going abroad and have a chat about pros and cons. But to just say your holidays are "Boring" is rude and judgemental.

You just have to rise above it!

irregularegular · 31/08/2023 16:37

There's much more to do in the UK if the weather is bad

Huh? More than where? You seem to have a very narrow view of possible foreign holiday destinations!!

JudgeJ · 31/08/2023 16:38

BubziOwl · 31/08/2023 16:11

This post hits the nail on the head!

Show quote history

So many people visit places like Egypt and never leave their hotel! One couple I knew of wanted the management to cut back the greenery on their balcony because sitting down they couldn't see the Nile!

Imicola · 31/08/2023 16:38

I can't help but think what your friends carbon footprint must be with so many long-haul holidays 🤔

But aside from that - it's your holiday, not hers, so tell her to wind her neck in and enjoy your holiday!

MrWoodhousecanfeeladraught · 31/08/2023 16:39

Makinguseofthethingsthatwefind · 31/08/2023 15:29

My guess is your friend is more concerned you’re not envious of her multiple holidays abroad. I imagine a lot of people tell her how lucky she is and how jealous they are and here you are saying you’d rather chill In Cornwall. Don’t let her spoil your getaway, what she thinks doesn’t matter 😊

This 100%. Your friend sounds like the one who is insecure and she clearly needs to try to wobble you to help make her feel better. It doesn’t matter where or how you holiday; it’s all about who you’re with and enjoying the passing of time together. You sound really happy with your life OP but not everyone will be pleased for you!

BumpyaDaisyevna · 31/08/2023 16:41

SusanandMidge · 31/08/2023 15:01

Thanks. I suppose I just felt that everyone must be rolling their eyes and saying 'there they are, off on another boring cosy holiday.' But obviously I'm just being over sensitive. I just got a bit of a shock when she said it. I used to wonder why she never wanted to go on a relaxing holiday (hers are always booked through a group with lots of early morning starts, planned activities etc) and wouldn't really enjoy the ones she goes on, but would never have criticised them like that. To each their own.

Unfortunately other people are far too self absorbed to spend any time at all thinking and judging the kind of holiday you take.

No one cares tbh. Painful to realise I know - but also liberating 👍

Annasoror · 31/08/2023 16:42

I think your holidays sound lovely, OP, and the environmental costs is much less than your friend's holidays. She sounds a bit insensitive and rude. Some of my best holidays have been in nice cottages in the UK, which is actually a very varied and storied place.

Changingmymind66 · 31/08/2023 16:43

I asked our kids their favourite holidays. Their reply shocked me. Despite many trips abroad it was camping nearby. Just enjoy yourselves. We're lucky to live in a beautiful country and appreciate it. Also, I remember much preferring alton towers to disneyworld. I never dared to tell my parents though.....

Peachy2005 · 31/08/2023 16:48

YABU to care what she thinks. We just did our first family long-haul and while it was fab once we were there, it was proper torture on the 4 extremely long flights and I wouldn’t do it again - unless someone offered me 1st class 😂

Yellowlegobrick · 31/08/2023 16:52

If we all took a leaf out of your book OP

the environment would be less fucked
the British economy would benefit

I love uk holidays too.

suburbophobe · 31/08/2023 16:53

I hope she gets caught up in the travel chaos.

Gosh, aren't you charming? 🙄

Tabitha1960 · 31/08/2023 16:53

Why on earth are you letting someone else's opinions affect you so much? Of COURSE she's going to think your holidays boring, and you will think hers expensive and stressful.

Each to her own!

PS I am with YOU -- air travel now is horrible. Unless you are a wealthy celeb, you are treated like cattle. I will never go abroad again.

doroda · 31/08/2023 16:53