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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think she's in big trouble

297 replies

skatermom · 29/08/2023 06:45

My 14 year old daughter went out into town with her friend yesterday afternoon being bank holiday Monday. We live in a small village and she walks everywhere mostly. This time, they decided to get on the train and thought she would buy a ticket on the train. Her friend has a season ticket due to taking a train for school.
Well, the train conductor gave her a penalty notice for £50 and that a letter will be sent to her address as to what to do.

The problem is that she said she was not about to give her name and address to a stranger so she gave them a false name AND address!
So we will never receive said letter!
I've been so worried because I know it's an offence to not have a ticket but a worse one to give false details. I'm sure it's a criminal offence!
I'm so worried that she'll be on a CCTV somewhere or a 'wanted' ad placed out for her. I haven't slept all night thinking about this.

What would you do? Will they come find her?
Am I unreasonable to think she will be in big trouble with this?

OP posts:
GuinnessBird · 29/08/2023 10:03

Isn't buying a train ticket a condition of being allowed on the train?

DrSbaitso · 29/08/2023 10:04

Dwappy · 29/08/2023 09:31

How do the staff know where the people got on? Do your train lines all charge the same no matter how many stops people go? Otherwise I think you'll find an awful lot of people only got on the train at "the stop before" they got off.....

Show quote history

It does require a little bit of faith, but for the most part it works. Just as most people will buy a ticket on the train if given the option, even if they had hoped for a free ride. If the purpose really is just to get people to pay fares, that should be OK.

Yes, there will be some people who will karate chop the conductor, jump out of the window amd vault the ticket barriers rather than pay £2.80 but they're rare enough that a ticket selling, on-train conductor will cover enough bases.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 29/08/2023 10:06

I've been so worried because I know it's an offence to not have a ticket but a worse one to give false details. I'm sure it's a criminal offence!
I'm so worried that she'll be on a CCTV somewhere or a 'wanted' ad placed out for her. I haven't slept all night thinking about this

Jesus, overreaction much?

What would I do? I would say not a sensible thing to do, but she knows now for next time to buy a ticket before getting on the train, and if a letter arrives we'll deal with it. Not sure what else we could do? I wouldn't be punishing her. I've been caught by getting on a train without a ticket before as I was running late and just ran on, if I was 14 I might've panicked and given fake details as well. Well no I wouldn't, I wasn't that quick thinking.

NewName122 · 29/08/2023 10:06

Schmokin · 29/08/2023 07:11

Can’t remember the last time I went on a train that didn’t have a ticket barrier? Are you sure this is not a series of lies here OP.

I'm surprised now when I go on a train and there is a ticket barrier.

ReginaRegina · 29/08/2023 10:07

Tbf you always used to be able to buy tickets on the train.

Dolores87 · 29/08/2023 10:08

She'll be fine. They won't chase her from the CCTV. Noone has the funds or time for that. Honestly if my kid had done this I'd probably laugh at their quick thinking.

UnctuousUnicorns · 29/08/2023 10:12

ReginaRegina · 29/08/2023 10:07

Tbf you always used to be able to buy tickets on the train.

As pps and myself have said, you still can in plenty of places.

Cosycardigans · 29/08/2023 10:13

When I was a fare dodging teenager with no money of my own, they used to have a hand held machine that would look up the name and address to see if it matched what you gave them.

Cosycardigans · 29/08/2023 10:15

DrSbaitso · 29/08/2023 10:04

It does require a little bit of faith, but for the most part it works. Just as most people will buy a ticket on the train if given the option, even if they had hoped for a free ride. If the purpose really is just to get people to pay fares, that should be OK.

Yes, there will be some people who will karate chop the conductor, jump out of the window amd vault the ticket barriers rather than pay £2.80 but they're rare enough that a ticket selling, on-train conductor will cover enough bases.

Show quote history

I want to live where you live, it costs about a tenner to go twenty minutes on the train here.

UnctuousUnicorns · 29/08/2023 10:15

"Yes, there will be some people who will karate chop the conductor, jump out of the window amd vault the ticket barriers rather than pay £2.80 but they're rare enough that a ticket selling, on-train conductor will cover enough bases"

😅 Or hide in the toilet every time the inspector walks by.

wowthatsharsh · 29/08/2023 10:17

She won't be in big trouble.

Some teenagers are smoking drugs, shop lifting etc. Although what your daughter did is not right, in comparison it's not a big issue!

andrainwillmaketheflowersgrow · 29/08/2023 10:19

Cosycardigans · 29/08/2023 10:13

When I was a fare dodging teenager with no money of my own, they used to have a hand held machine that would look up the name and address to see if it matched what you gave them.

I highly doubt that 🙈

Clymene · 29/08/2023 10:23

You can buy tickets on the train here.

Teenagers have been fare dodging since time immemorial

Clymene · 29/08/2023 10:25

And no, nothing will happen. The conductor was being a jobsworth.

GasPanic · 29/08/2023 10:31

It's not a big deal and she is not in big trouble.

The big deal is that she might try that trick in the future in a situation where it will get her in big trouble.

I'd also worry about the parent-child interaction. For example she did this and presumably knew it was wrong, why did she then tell you about it ?

Because she is scared of the consequences or because she thinks you won't do anything about it ?

Anyway, you've got the opportunity here to either to teach her the behaviour is unacceptable, or do nothing and hope for the best.

VickyEadieofThigh · 29/08/2023 10:38

Fieldofbrokenpromises · 29/08/2023 07:26

Oh yes, fare-dodging and lying, great things to be proud of.

Show quote history

Indeed. I find the comment quoted quite astonishing.

Fizbosshoes · 29/08/2023 10:39

I'd also worry about the parent-child interaction. For example she did this and presumably knew it was wrong, why did she then tell you about it ?

Because she is scared of the consequences or because she thinks you won't do anything about it ?

...or because she's worried and asking mum advice.
"I got into trouble on the train because I thought you could buy a ticket on the train...and it turns our I couldn't...and I panicked and gave a fake name and address"

It's not unreasonable for a 14 year old to be independent enough to go out with friends, but then come a bit unstuck in an unexpected situation, and want reassurance they aren't going to get into trouble.

Highdaysandholidays1 · 29/08/2023 10:42

We live in an area where sometimes the ticket inspector doesn't come around. It used to be you could buy tickets on the train, which was much better. Having to queue at one machine as the train is arriving is so stressful and it sometimes breaks! My children have got on and off without tickets when it was the old system of buying on the train. Now they get online tickets on their phone and there's no real excuse for not doing that!

Highdaysandholidays1 · 29/08/2023 10:43

But I expect the stress of it all and telling lies has stressed her out, so it has it's own natural consequence, I don't think she seems like she's heading for a life of crime.

BitOutOfPractice · 29/08/2023 10:43

@Cosycardigans do you still believe that your mom really did ring Father Christmas when you were naughty as well? 😉

Try not to worry OP. It sounds like you are handling it well and your DD has learnt a lesson. Surely every single person ever got into 'scrapes' when they were teenagers?

As for the person saying she shouldn't be travelling alone, good grief!

ConstitutionHill · 29/08/2023 10:46

Stella123456 · 29/08/2023 07:14

I’d be proud of her for her quick thinking. It shows a smart girl. And I wouldn’t give it another thought.

So you'd be proud of your daughter fare dodging and lying?

DrSbaitso · 29/08/2023 10:47

UnctuousUnicorns · 29/08/2023 10:15

"Yes, there will be some people who will karate chop the conductor, jump out of the window amd vault the ticket barriers rather than pay £2.80 but they're rare enough that a ticket selling, on-train conductor will cover enough bases"

😅 Or hide in the toilet every time the inspector walks by.

Or that, yes.

But most people, even chancers, will pay if there's an on-train conductor who gives them the option, or a closed barrier but the option to pay at the end of the journey.

We don't need twats on a power trip threatening 14 year olds with arrest. We just need options to pay on the train and at the end as well, in addition to options to pre pay. It used to be very common and it's still done in some places. If you've got conductors on the train anyway, why wouldn't you?

SonicStars · 29/08/2023 10:49

Kids do it all the time. Nothing will come of it from their side.

Your daughter has a moral problem here, not a legal one.

ColumnofFire · 29/08/2023 10:51

A couple of years ago a bailiff turned up at my house asking for someone who I’d never heard of & didn’t live at our address, but I recognised her name because we’d had a lot of letters arriving for her. The bailiff was issuing some kind of court summons for her, I had to show him my ID to prove I wasn’t her, & he checked our car details to see who it was registered to. The bailiff was nice & friendly & it wasn’t a scary experience or anything, but he told me that this was all in aid of a train fair not being paid! He said the culprit had obviously given a fake address, probably a fake name too, & therefore there’d be no way of them tracking her down so she’d get away with it. I was surprised at the lengths they’d gone to to hunt her down, but evidently it was all pointless in the end! So I wouldn’t worry.

Sarvanga38 · 29/08/2023 10:51

CurlewKate · 29/08/2023 07:18

It seems pretty unlikely that she would have given a false name and address convincingly on the spur of the moment to an experienced official. Maybe he decided not to make a big deal out of it.

That was my thought, although I went with the premise that she would have given a name and address for someone else she actually knows, to sound fast and convincing enough. Let's hope she's not dropped someone else in it.

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