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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Genuinely unsure if IABU

252 replies

devildeepbluesea · 25/08/2023 20:10

My lovely neighbour (rented property) told me on moving in that she works nights as a HCP. This is borne out, as far as it goes - she’s clearly out overnight but only for 1-2 nights per week.

In the meantime I’m pretty sure she’s running a commercial kitchen from her home, and making her living mostly from this.

Are there any circumstances where this is ok? I don’t want to knacker her income stream but equally I’m a bit worried about vermin (lots of evidence of food prep outside in the garden).

OP posts:
MadeleineMummy · 26/08/2023 23:50

restingbitchface30 · 26/08/2023 23:28

My very first thought unfortunately

Show quote history

Yes she is right to challenge anything that goes against our British way of life. it is not right that anyone comes to our country and tries to set up a business, especially serving ethnic food. I don’t know why anyone would want to eat that poison anyway. Give me coleslaw and quiche, proper British food any day to that foreign muck. Have you tried putting out bear traps in her garden to catch her in the act of disposing of food waste in her garden? They can be purchased quite cheaply online (pm me if you want direct links).

Anyone who would want to not boil vegetables for at least an hour and decides to taint our glorious food culture with herbs or spices like these damned foreigners really needs to have the book thrown at them. Frankly, hanging is too good for them.

UsingChangeofName · 26/08/2023 23:57

So, starts by being

  • "genuinely unsure if IABU" to getting tetchy that most people think she is.
  • Then worried about smells to later admitting the cooking "smells amazing"
  • Can't actually see her garden
  • Worried about "vermin" but has seen no evidence
  • Worried about food being left out but hasn't actually any evidence of that
  • Is her "lovely neighbour" but wants to report her.
  • Has no idea whether she is actually prepping food in her garden as can't see, and can't answer those asking that.
  • Has no evidence she is running a commercial kitchen, but assumes it because she has smelled some cooking Confused. Has it not occurred to you she might batch cook for herself ? Enjoy cooking things for friends or colleagues ? Be volunteering for a lunch club or homeless shelter? Neighbours? Relatives ?
What an odd thread.

Yes, YABU

Milliemoo6 · 27/08/2023 01:09

I don't understand how you can know she's running a food business without a hygiene rating if you don't even know what she's cooking, do you know her business name? Unless you do, you won't find her on the FSA website as home businesses aren't registered by address due to them being a private residence.

Buffs · 27/08/2023 01:12

When I lived in the UK my lovely next door neighbour always peeled her vegetables in the garden, I think she liked sitting in the sunshine. Now I’m in the US and everyone cooks and preps in the garden, they even have outdoor kitchens.
I don’t think you have anything to worry about 😊

Pupinski · 27/08/2023 01:24

devildeepbluesea · 25/08/2023 20:21

Smells, noise (cooking very late at night), concern about vermin.

It might impact her LL’s insurance too.

Show quote history

If that's your rationale, I've lost sympathy. She has a right to cook what she wants when she wants without your permission, and the landlord's insurance is nothing to do with you. Stop being a busybody.

If you have evidence that she's preparing food commercially without having had a legally required hygiene inspection, that would be a different matter and you should report her as that's a public health issue.

damsoncheese · 27/08/2023 01:44

Have none of you ever looked out of an upstairs window and seen other gardens that way?

kayya · 27/08/2023 03:34

These comments 🤣🤣

bluetongue · 27/08/2023 03:58

She’s cooking food, not meth. Mind your own business.

Chickenkeev · 27/08/2023 04:01

MadeleineMummy · 26/08/2023 23:37

She obviously cannot be a lovely neighbour if you are concerned. She could be a double agent creating Novichok to kill foreign nationals on British soil, or she could be running an illegal restaurant or even cooking food to feed unemployed feckless layabouts, rough sleepers or illegal migrants.

what I would suggest is creating a spreadsheet of all her comings and goings with accurate times and descriptions of her attire, deportment and mood, take photos of her leaving and install video cameras around your property facing her windows and garden to document the minutiae of her life. Maybe take to making silent calls every hour, 24 hours a day to check up on her whereabouts. I would suggest getting your neighbours to spy on her as well. Why not make posters and pamphlets outlining your concerns and pasting them around the town and into your neighbours’ letterboxes with your photographic and documentary evidence to reinforce your suspicions.

you seem like a conscientious person who is fastidious and driven. I am sure that you can fathom her secrets within the year and persecute And punish her for her indiscretions eventually.

good luck, you seem like such a lovely person.

This made my night, bravo 😂

MadeleineMummy · 27/08/2023 08:18

Ohgollymolly · 26/08/2023 20:18

This would pee me off. Report her to the council and landlord.

There is absolutely nothing worse than other people’s cooking smells. You expect it at meal times and perhaps at odd times on occasion, but not commercial level where it’s happening all the time.

And anyone who says this wouldn’t bother them is lying.

You are right. Proper British people would have a cooked breakfast of bacon, eggs, black pudding, fried bread, grilled tomatoes, mushrooms, baked beans and toast on a morning between 7 and 8:30. Then a sandwich for lunch and boiled potatoes, boiled carrots, boiled peas and a chop and perhaps grilled fish on a Friday between 6-7:30. The only variation would be a midweek beans or tinned spaghetti on toast. Outside of these hours is a disgrace and people should not be able to use their kitchens at all. I would write to my MP and get Nigel Faridge involved to campaign for proper sociable British cooking hours.

I cannot recognise my country anymore. These foriners are flooding in and cooking at all hours of the day.

PurpleChrayne · 27/08/2023 08:20

missmollygreen · 25/08/2023 20:15

Why does this bother you so much? Is it having and effect on your life?

She said why it bothers her. She's worried about vermin.

sparklefresh · 27/08/2023 08:26

You don't know what she's cooking, you can't see into her garden, you don't actually know if there's food left out. You don't know if she's doing it commercially (she could be bull prepping for a sick family member). Sounds like you just want to disrupt her life.

sparklefresh · 27/08/2023 08:33

bluetongue · 27/08/2023 03:58

She’s cooking food, not meth. Mind your own business.

Right?!

MadeleineMummy · 27/08/2023 08:34

CurlewKate · 25/08/2023 20:31

She's not cooking "foreign food" is she?

In the 70’s an Irish woman moved in to our village. She started to peel potatoes on her back doorstep when the sun was shining as her garden a was north facing and she had a small poky flat.

I made sure that this was not left unpunished and my neighbours and I wrote to the Daily Mail, the local paper and had words with members of the parish council. After years of ostracism, spitting at her in the street and our children throwing stones at her window, the fenian miscreant was hounded out of our decent community.

vickylou78 · 27/08/2023 08:37

Without more details op I'm not sure anyone can help you. Eg. How do you know its a commercial enterprise? How do you know she's not batch cooking to go in freezer or cooking for elderly relatives etc. What food prep is happening in garden? How much food waste is left outside? What noise is she making and at what times? Have you seen any vermin? All relevant and you can't really report to council until you have information about what nuisance she is actually causing.

Bib1234 · 27/08/2023 08:46

You asked if you were actually being unreasonable in your heading … but actually sound like you wanted everyone to telll you that you weren’t.

Elfblossom · 27/08/2023 08:50

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pictoosh · 27/08/2023 09:38

I had to laugh at 'cooking noise' - that's a complaint from someone who wants to have a problem if ever I've heard one.

Elfblossom · 27/08/2023 15:57

pictoosh · 27/08/2023 09:38

I had to laugh at 'cooking noise' - that's a complaint from someone who wants to have a problem if ever I've heard one.

Crikey pictoosh! I can hear you stirring that pan from here and please! Stop peeling those potatoes so loudly, you're giving me a headache 😉 😆

GolgafrinchamB · 27/08/2023 16:36

Oh for god's sake, @devildeepbluesea , it is legal to run a food business from a home, and to not have a food hygeine rating. It can take up to three years for the inspection team to get around to doing the rating, there's frequently a massive backlog. She can trade in the meantime.

It's also legal to earn the bulk of your income from a domestic kitchen. Plenty of people do this.

She will need to meet the food hygiene standards and may well need to change how she does things, but the bulk of your complaints are unreasonable.

minpin · 27/08/2023 17:17

I am a landlord. It would completely negate my insurance to have someone running a food business from home. Not to mention environmental and neighbourly impact. People who run legitimate catering businesses have to pay so many costs and abide by many rules. This is basically cheating the system and sounds unsanitary. I would report it because it’s dangerous …

Vintagecreamandcottagepie · 27/08/2023 17:40

@minpin

There's no evidence whatsoever she's actually running a commercial food business! Just vague cooking smell getting on op's nerves. And an overactive imagination.

Imagine of we all reported our neighbours for such vague suspicions. Hear a dog? Must be a puppy farm etc.

Wouldn't be a very nice world would it?

And the authorities would be spending even more investigating the accusations of dim-witted nosy neighbours than they do now...

UsingChangeofName · 27/08/2023 19:38

Well said @Vintagecreamandcottagepie

@minpin - the issue here, is that the OP has absolutely no evidence that her neighbour is running a catering business from home.

threatmatrix · 28/08/2023 00:38

It’s really non of your business is it. Bloody hell.

Emz6103 · 28/08/2023 02:12

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