To feel worried for this womans saferty and wonder why she isnt?

[girlfriend44]

Looking out the window in the middle of the night was a woman walking down the road in shorts and alone.

I was wondering why she dosent feel scared, I would?

Yes she should be able too. Yes it dosent matter what she was wearing, but really would you want your daughter to do that? I wouldnt and wouldnt do it myself.

I wonder if some people dont listen to the news and why they arent scared that they will be attacked or abused walking along in the early hours. Do they think it wont happen to them?

We all know what some men are like, its on here often enough?
Remember that I do know women should be able too and it dosent matter if she was wearing a bag on her head, clothing has nothing to do with it really? but you just have to wonder why?

Was she brave or silly and would you have felt worried for her?

Putting your weird issues onto her, even if she has no idea, is ridiculous. You are wanting to control her as much as contriving the situation to assume men want too, I am sick of the patronising of women and people trying to dress it up as fake concern to justify their own issues

I've never been able to relate to women who are afraid to walk around at night, I mean I get why from reading what they write/listening to their stories, but I have never felt that way personally

I've never been catcalled, approached, harassed or anything, a bonus I suppose of not being a looker and passing as a man with a hood up

Honestly I feel more intimidated walking past groups of women outside our local pubs, I've had many horrible interactions with bitchy drunk (and sober) women, I had one make moves as if to fight me! Zero from men, even on hot summer evenings wearing a tight vest top

I used to walk my neighborhood at night but have had to stop due to bears of all things. Neighbor has caught multiple bears roaming through her yard via her Ring doorbell camera. Weird but true. I really miss walking in the evening.

I think it depends on the area. Round here I wouldn’t worry at all but somewhere else I might worry a bit more.

I wouldn't have been concerned no. You seem very anxious.

YABU
You would feel scared. She didn't. That it where it all ends.

If you are anxious about total strangers, then maybe get some help for your anxiety.

I hate these threads.

The OP has been called:

Mental
Anxious
Weird
Ridiculous
Paranoid
Etc. Etc.

The sneering is horrible - pile-ons are the worst of MN.

It's a fact that many women frequently don't feel safe walking home at night. The OP focused on what the woman was wearing, which is a red rag. But seriously? Women attacking other women for being afraid of walking home at night? Posters sneering at women who admit to feeling anxious about it?

No debate, no bloody kindness, just the PA head-tilt and "are you usually this anxious, OP?"

Ugh.

I agree.

This thread is fairly unpleasant to read.

The woman's clothes do not matter. Women being so awful to other women for being worried about their safety is bloody horrible.

A few posters here should really examine their attitudes towards other women and the issues facing all of us.

No, I wouldn't feel scared . Are you suggesting we should cover up and/or be indoors for a certain time?
Fuck
That

Well said
For a so called women's forum, from someone who's been here years I've seen a sharp turn towards the right and anti women voices lately

If you feel worrried for women walking alone at night - this is how those of us how have loved and travelled independently all our lives get around - you’re going to be beside yourself when you realise the biggest risk the women you know ever take is having a male domestic partner…….

But I suspect you’re rather less interested in the stark reality of the most likely source of violence against women and rather more interested in judging someone who lives less narrowly and fearfully then you.

Women are more likely to be attacked by their partner in their home over some man hiding in the bushes at night.

Probably time to turn off the news.

The woman's clothes do not matter
For clarification I was referring to this bit
They don't matter
So why bring it up in the first place?

Yabu
I walk everywhere alone and I like to walk at night. I also work nights.
As a teen id wander around at night.
I've been raped and physically assaulted by men and also mugged.. and guess what.. none of these things happened whilst I was walking alone at night. The rape and the physical assaults were done by men I knew. One by a guy at a party and the other by a guy I was actually in a relationship with. And the mugging took place in Broad daylight in a city centre!!
I think whilst being alone at night might feel scary if you look at statistics sadly you've much more to fear from people you actually know than you do from random strangers lurking in bushes. Of course that occasionally happens but its rare. You're far more at risk in a busy bar tbh.
Reminds me of my gran going nuts when she found out I went hiking on the moors alone to see the full moon... telling me 'what if a crazy murderer is out there waiting for you you shouldn't go up there alone as a woman!' So ridiculous. Thats literally the last place I'd get attacked.

YABU to be this concerned about how other women live in the world. I've had awful things happen to me. Doesn't mean I don’t go out at night alone. Or travel alone for that matter. I am aware of my surroundings at all times, but I will not live in fear.

Another victim of the AIBU hyenas.
You had way more chance of being attacked than that woman you saw.
Dangerous place this.

I’m in London and walked the dog last night in the dark wearing shorts!
I didn’t know this was a daring or scary thing to do.

A few posters here should really examine their attitudes towards other women and the issues facing all of us.
Yes, indeed. Starting with the OP! She is victim blaming a woman before anything has even happened. She is asking us to judge a total stranger as "brave" or "silly" for going out in public in clothes that OP thinks are wrong for the occasion.
Some posters are concern-trolling the OP right back, which seems to me to be an appropriate response.

Stop listening to the news!! No every person who goes out is in immediate danger like the news would have you believe. Yes there are people out there who want to hurt others but this is not the average person!

I don't think that person would give a toss if a woman was wearing shorts or joggers. If they want to attack some one then a pair of shorts will not be the deciding factor!

Women attacking other women for being afraid of walking home at night? Posters sneering at women who admit to feeling anxious about it?

No one is attacking the women who feel anxious or afraid at night. We are calling out the OP for feeling afraid FOR someone else. For projecting their own misgivings and fears on to someone else. And we are pointing out that statistically the woman outside alone was in far less risk than a woman at home or a man outside. Because that matters to the internal risk assessments we all make before doing anything.

There's a risk getting in a car, there's a risk crossing the road, there's a risk turning the stove on, there's a risk playing sport, there's a risk owning a dog, there's a risk walking down the stairs.... but do we not do those things because there's a risk and people get hurt doing them?

Sometimes you have to be out after dark if you don't own a car. I'm a non driver and I'm not getting taxis everywhere so I have to walk from the bus stop if I've been out in the evening.

I've had jobs where I'd need to get home late at night or in the early hours of the morning since I was 18. I've also had to get home from nights out somehow. I'd have rarely been in shorts, but I doubt that'd make much difference to safety. I don't think I'm especially "silly", nor was the woman in the OP.

Both my son and my daughter have done similar (they often finish work late). Ds does tend to either phone me to talk or get an uber but dd actually feels safer not getting an uber from the tube to home as you never know who is driving.

She might be safer walking alone at night, rather than at home with an abusive partner. Far more women are attacked at home compared to outside