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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want dd14 to have a small business

117 replies

tiredmum9 · 19/08/2023 17:28

My 14 year old dd has been making crystal bracelets & jewellry for a while and is now asking to sell them at markets and possibly online. She says this involves setting up an etsy, plus a Facebook, Instagram and Tiktok to promote her products. Aibu to say no? I really don't want to deal with the hassle of these social medias, and paying for countless supplies, preparing packaging as well as helping her ship the items just for her to only make a few sales and likely get fed up

Not to mention she will be preparing for her GCSES as she goes into Year 10 in September and this will distract her and stress her out more

OP posts:
JudgeRudy · 20/08/2023 01:33

I don't understand. Why would you be paying for stuff and sorting deliveries. It'd be your daughter's business, not yours. OK I can see initially there might be a cash flow problem so you (or dad) might need to step in, but that's all I'd be doing. It'd be a loan too.

RantyAnty · 20/08/2023 01:40

tiredmum9 · 19/08/2023 17:58

The trouble with selling as bootsales/craft fairs is that my DH would have to drop her off (and stay for boot sales) which he wouldn't want to do.

Also she struggles with maths so I'm not sure she'd know how to calculate everything and make a profit

I do like the idea of her having her own little buisness, I'm just trying to work out the logistics because it doesn't seem manageable at all

You and your DH seem so negative and slack.

Of course it wouldn't seem manageable to you because of your fixed negative mindset.

As for maths, the more you do it, the better you get at it.

Just give her the seed money and let her get on with it as you and DH would just drag her down.

Fizbosshoes · 20/08/2023 06:50

I agree with pp that boot fairs are not the place to try though.
I did the same thing when I was a teen at a bootfair, trying to sell bead earrings at a bootfaur - none sold because its not what people go to bootfairs for. Also people want a bargain and would likely offer pennies.
Craft or school fairs are possibly safer (school fairs or church halls might be the cheapest option as established or larger craft fairs might charge a lot for a table or pitch)

TibetanTerrah · 20/08/2023 06:56

tiredmum9 · 19/08/2023 18:06

I'm happy to go with her but I can't drive, and dh isn't willing to

Show quote history

She'll remember how unsupportive you both were.

Why can't you help her with the maths at least instead of crushing her entrepreneurial spirit? Sad

It just sounds like neither of you as parents can be bothered.

Dotcheck · 20/08/2023 07:04

I work with 16 - 18 year olds.
Many young people do have small businesses, and the amount they learn is extraordinary. Not just math, and business plans, but marketing and social media analytics. These kids tend to be more confident, independent, and find it easier making career decisions.
Please don’t discourage her!

JustKeepSlimming · 20/08/2023 07:05

It's also worth asking someone who does craft fairs regularly whether they would sell some of her stuff on their stall (for a cut of the profits). That way she doesn't have to stand around all day selling, and she doesn't have to pay the full amount for the table. Some people are glad to have a bit extra to bulk out their table.

I used to do craft fairs and did this a couple of times for a friend; after a while she got her own table, but it was handy at the start to get her up and running.

Kweeky · 20/08/2023 07:07

I don’t imagine she will sell much at all - people sell similar at our local farmers markets and I don’t see anyone buying. Unless this is really unusual and exciting stuff. I also have a friend who makes pretty stuff with resin but it’s really not fashionable and gets her ideas online so someone else is already doing it (x1000) -I suspect DD will be the same.
If she does some craft fairs and Xmas fairs initially that might be enough to put her off. Sitting looking cheerful for 3hours whilst selling nothing can’t be easy.

Hibiscrubbed · 20/08/2023 07:24

Support her. Please.

AmytheDancingBrick · 20/08/2023 07:25

I agree with @Kweeky. I’ve visited a few fairs this summer and footfall is very low and most people seem to shuffle around trying not to make eye contact with the sellers.

A table at a craft fair costs around £25 (more for bigger fairs). She would need to be confident of significant sales and have the stock to even break even.

As for Etsy - it’s filled with people and their hobby jobs, I doubt many of them make any money. I suspect that 12 months from now you would have a load of materials covered in dust at the back of a cupboard.

speakout · 20/08/2023 07:59

Some craft fairs are very busy, I have a college near me and their christmas fair is totally packed, high prices and vendors sell out by lunch time.

Equally I have been to some craft fairs that are very quiet.

Finding a good selling platform that works for her business model will be key.

I make and sell craft items full time and have explored options.
I do sell on Etsy, but competition is fierce. My busiest platforms are ebay and Amazon, although both are demanding in terms of seller performance, especially Amazon. I also have a web site and I also supply wholesale to a few shops.

You have had some good insight OP, however you/she decides to sell I would suggest keeping investment low to start with.

speakout · 20/08/2023 08:05

I suspect that 12 months from now you would have a load of materials covered in dust at the back of a cupboard.

Some people do make a good living from selling hand made - even on etsy.

If you look at seller stats you will see many sellers who have sold thousands of items. It is possible to make good money.
I sell craft items online and I struggle to keep my revenue under the VAT threshold.
I have to put my listings on holiday mode and take a break from the 1st December until after christmas because I can't keep up with the tsunami of sales.

Some craft businesses do work. Many don't- but you will never know until you try.

Kweeky · 20/08/2023 08:12

Although I said I don’t think she will make money I do think it’s a great idea for teens to understand overheads, advertising, how to display stuff nicely et etcetc and profit and loss. I have a hobby and would love to sell the stuff I make to get it out of the house! I’m trying to work out what people actually want.

Shade17 · 20/08/2023 08:14

Well, if it succeeds the benefits are obvious but even if it doesn’t then it’s still really good experience and real-world education. She’ll be able to see how some of the things she’s learnt at school can be applied.

Enoughnowbrandon · 20/08/2023 08:16

It's not just about the amount of money she may or may not make.
I do craft fairs and when someone falls in love with something you've made and wants to pay money for it, that is a massive self esteem boost. Never mind the experience she will gain in social and business skills.
I genuinely don't understand why you and your husband aren't supporting her. That's your job as parents. Take her to craft fairs. Help her with the maths. Encourage her, for goodness sake.

Tiqtaq · 20/08/2023 08:18

Recommend Depop for this
Very straightforward

MooFroo · 20/08/2023 08:26

I’d let her do it but has to show you some research first. lots of tik tokkers talking about side hustles etc so it’s v easy for kids to get excited about making money but they don’t show the hard work behind the scenes!

my daughter did the same thing and had an idea for a small crafts biz selling letterbox hampers during lockdown. I asked her for a spreadsheet showing all the costs and expected sales. She was hugely surprised at paying commission to Etsy and postage and had when I went through it with her showed her how to look for cheaper suppliers rather than buying eveything on Amazon.

have her £50 to start with to match what she was putting in and did all the shopping with her - she lasted about 3 weeks and had 5 orders.
it was such a faff storing the bits and pieces, I had to post the orders she did have.
she expected orders to flood in but didn’t spend the time to get to know Etsy and how it all works - it needs time and is deffo not just a case of listing something on there and waiting for a flood of sales.

in the end she ended up making little gifts for her friends birthdays with the stock!

if your DD is willing to do the work then get her to do the background work first including coatings and start from there

cuckyplunt · 20/08/2023 08:26

Certainly not, let her spend her time, sleeping, scrolling TikTok and smoking dope, like all the other 14 yos.

LlynTegid · 20/08/2023 08:28

Boot sales or market stalls don't have to be every week, perhaps could be for a few before Christmas. Are there none that could accessed by public transport, or could your DH be persuaded to do just a few?

I agree about not doing online business.

Sigmama · 20/08/2023 08:30

Could you not use public transport, or cycle, and ultimately learn to drive

Hawkins009 · 20/08/2023 08:30

tiredmum9 · 19/08/2023 17:58

The trouble with selling as bootsales/craft fairs is that my DH would have to drop her off (and stay for boot sales) which he wouldn't want to do.

Also she struggles with maths so I'm not sure she'd know how to calculate everything and make a profit

I do like the idea of her having her own little buisness, I'm just trying to work out the logistics because it doesn't seem manageable at all

Why not let her at least try first ?

InsomniacsWife · 20/08/2023 08:30

YABVU

To say no essentially because you can't be arsed is dreadful

I agree, it needs to me managed along side homework and school but that's not enough of a reason to say no

Autieangel · 20/08/2023 08:30

Why doesn't she stick to selling on line if driving is a issue? I'd give her some start up money (to be paid back) and tell her to workout her costs and profit and maybe give her a few website links for how to sell on line. But be clear it's her venture/her responsibility.

FluffyDiplodocus · 20/08/2023 08:32

Of all the things your teenager could be getting up to in their spare time, this is a fairly good one! YABU to be unsupportive.

Dibbydoos · 20/08/2023 08:33

tiredmum9 · 19/08/2023 17:58

The trouble with selling as bootsales/craft fairs is that my DH would have to drop her off (and stay for boot sales) which he wouldn't want to do.

Also she struggles with maths so I'm not sure she'd know how to calculate everything and make a profit

I do like the idea of her having her own little buisness, I'm just trying to work out the logistics because it doesn't seem manageable at all

The maths thing is easy, help her set up an excel spreadsheet into which her material costs, time and profit (65%) are added together to create the item cost.

The boots are stuff is harder because at 14yo she cannot be left alone.

I'd be all up for supporting my child to do this.

Helpmepleaseimbusy · 20/08/2023 08:35

tiredmum9 · 19/08/2023 17:28

My 14 year old dd has been making crystal bracelets & jewellry for a while and is now asking to sell them at markets and possibly online. She says this involves setting up an etsy, plus a Facebook, Instagram and Tiktok to promote her products. Aibu to say no? I really don't want to deal with the hassle of these social medias, and paying for countless supplies, preparing packaging as well as helping her ship the items just for her to only make a few sales and likely get fed up

Not to mention she will be preparing for her GCSES as she goes into Year 10 in September and this will distract her and stress her out more

Wow how unsupportive and unreasonable. I would love it if my child had the passion and determination to do this.