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AIBU?

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Original poster

4 year old asking about breasts

75 replies

cattleist · 13/08/2023 11:59

We are on a holiday in our native country. DD who is 4yr old is being extremely pampered by grandparents, uncles and aunts. The other day DD was hugging my sister and she suddenly blurted out "what are these big things?" referring to my sister's breasts. Since then she keeps asking my mum as well why she has big breasts. Is this abnormal behaviour for a 4yr old. Today she was looking at herself in the mirror and kept saying "mine ate tiny aunty has big ones". Her behaviour is driving me crazy. Am I overthinking?

OP posts:
LauraSaidIShouldBeNicer · 13/08/2023 12:01

Absolutely ridiculous question of course it's normal! Just explain that woman come in all different shapes and sizes. Why are you even over thinking it?

Zola1 · 13/08/2023 12:01

Course you're over thinking, surely every child in the world goes through this stage

DannyLaRuesBestFrock · 13/08/2023 12:02

What the hell? Of course it's normal. Don't give her a bloody complex over completely natural female anatomy.

JustCarryOnWalkingPast · 13/08/2023 12:03

It's normal. Tell her that all ladies have them, but some are bigger than others.

Needmorelego · 13/08/2023 12:04

“That’s her breasts. All ladies get them when they grow up. You’ll get some too. They are all different sizes though.”

SleepingStandingUp · 13/08/2023 12:04

It's fine op, it's annoying cos it's repetitive but it's perfectly normal.

Why does Nanna have big ones and I have little ones and you have floppy ones and Aunty Ava have bouncy ones and Aunty Jane has squishy ones?

You have little ones because they don't grow until you're much older, and then they grow all different shapes and sizes.

Clefable · 13/08/2023 12:05

Surely she's seen yours before? My DD is 4 and talks about boobies fairly often!

Cotton55 · 13/08/2023 12:07

What?! Of course it's normal behaviour for a 4 year old!! I'm shocked that you've even asked this! Just answer as pp's have suggested. And please, please don't give your child a complex about the female body but telling her to sssh or "we're don't talk about things like that" or something similarly awful.

BusinessClass · 13/08/2023 12:07

🤔

Giantwindows · 13/08/2023 12:08

Your four year old’s behaviour is driving you crazy because she’s asking perfectly normal questions and you’re failing to give her a proper answer? Jesus wept.

Original poster
cattleist · 13/08/2023 12:09

@SleepingStandingUp she's been repeatedly asking my sister, my aunt, my mom so I felt a bit embarrassed but now I am relieved after advice from mumsnet. I BFed her only for a year so she might not have any memory of seeing mine though.

OP posts:
SoCentralRain · 13/08/2023 12:09

Her behaviour? How odd. Just tell her what they’re called, what they are used for sometimes, they come in all shapes and sizes and that she’ll get hers when she grows up because she’s a girl. It’s not difficult.

summerlovingvibes · 13/08/2023 12:10

My 3 year old drew me a cracking pair of boobs the other day on her white board... and then went back to add nipples which were far too large and low 😂

Totally normal OP for children to ask about stuff like this, especially when they realise it's something they don't have!!

Appleblum · 13/08/2023 12:11

She's 4 and naturally curious. My DD even has names for my boobies!

Original poster
cattleist · 13/08/2023 12:11

I have asked this question not because I feel she's doing something wrong but just so i get an idea of how to deal with such questions in the future also. I did tell her big people have big ones and small girls have tiny ones🤪

OP posts:
Timetochangegonzo · 13/08/2023 12:11

Oh god. She might have BOD (breast obsessive disease). I’d call 111

Original poster
cattleist · 13/08/2023 12:12

@Timetochangegonzo 111 said wait for 24hrs or go to a&e 😂

OP posts:
SoCentralRain · 13/08/2023 12:12

I remember a little boy in my DD’s reception class who just used to stare at their teacher’s (very ample) boobs all the time, it was quite funny. I suppose that’s the age they get curious and realise men and women are different.

DinoRoar14 · 13/08/2023 12:13

Talking about books is currently my 4yo s favourite topic.
My boobs are the best. They are good for cwtchs and big.
Daddy's boobs are rubbish.
She wants to know where her boobs are.
She sometimes let's me know her opinion on strangers boobs.

Thank fuck she hasn't voiced this to people yet.

itsmylife7 · 13/08/2023 12:14

Don't you have breasts OP ? 🙄

TinkerbellefromYorkshire · 13/08/2023 12:18

Surely you have told her they are for feeding babies milk and everyone has different shapes and sizes.. and they grow bigger as you get older.. l can't believe she's never seen anyone breast feeding.. either a relative a friend or someone on telly or in a book you have read to her.
The first thing you must educate her on is they are to produce milk to feed babies and that she fed from yours..
Some of these posts really astound me.

Mmhmmn · 13/08/2023 12:24

summerlovingvibes · 13/08/2023 12:10

My 3 year old drew me a cracking pair of boobs the other day on her white board... and then went back to add nipples which were far too large and low 😂

Totally normal OP for children to ask about stuff like this, especially when they realise it's something they don't have!!

😂 😂

transformandriseup · 13/08/2023 12:25

My 4 year old has been curious about my breasts for a long time now. She now says "I'll have those when I'm older". I never thought it wasn't normal.

titchy · 13/08/2023 12:27

Wait till learns of the existence of penises...Hmm

Clefable · 13/08/2023 12:28

cattleist · 13/08/2023 12:09

@SleepingStandingUp she's been repeatedly asking my sister, my aunt, my mom so I felt a bit embarrassed but now I am relieved after advice from mumsnet. I BFed her only for a year so she might not have any memory of seeing mine though.

But surely she sees yours sometimes? I am getting changed around DD, sometimes she'll come in when I'm in the shower, etc. She has seen me naked lots of times!

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