To not want my kids to drink mocktails or AF beer?

[Thesenderofthiscard]

On holiday with grp of friends - oldest kids are 13, youngest 8.
the 5 teens have been asking for ‘mocktails’ when we’re out at cafes/ restaurants- Virgin bloody Mary’s, Virgin mojitos - and now the little one want them too.

I’m REALLY uncomfortable with this- Have said no to my teen so now I’m the worst parent in the world. I’m not happy with the normalising of drinking = fun or being ‘grown up’ at this age.
ine of the dad’s told me in need to get real, and for an AF beer for his 13 old son.
I ask him if he’d let his son have a ‘fake’ vale or cigarette and all he’ll broke lose.

oh, and not to mention these drinks are €8/10 a pop as they’re meant for no- drinking adults

YABU - lighten up! Let them feel like grown ups

YANBU - They’re too young to be pretending to drink.

I would not even batter an eyelid at this. It's fruit juice. It's not going to make them an alcoholic.

Kids might like 'grown up' things but it doesn't mean it's a slippery slope to the real thing. When I was a kid, we did used to get the 'real thing' - actual alcoholic drinks at Christmas etc. I don't think I was even 10 and though I'm sure they weren't that strong, I was definitely tipsy! I wouldn't dream of doing that for my children. But you're making a mountain out of a molehill in my opinion,

AF= Alcohol free beer!!

😆 oh come on!!

Children want to try new things, especially things which make them feel 'grown up'. It would be a shame to deny them such an innocent pleasure, especially on holiday.

One of DDs friends was not allowed to stay at DDs 16th birthday as we offerred them a glass of prosecvo on arrival. That girl was a total coke head at 20 whereas DD doesn't drink st all and is all about the match teas.

I let my 3yo & 2yo drink some of my mocktails when we go for dinner. Infant last time I got them one to share so they kept their hands off mine. 🤣

I'm surprised kids want to pretend to smoke these days. When I was a kid so many people were smokers and it seemed a bit cool. These days I don't see many people smoking anymore so I wonder if kids are inclined to copy the behaviour anymore.

😆😆

I do think those prices are extortionate but if it wasn't a cost thing, I would treat mine to one on holiday if they wanted. It's more about having a pretty looking drink with a fancy straw/umbrella/fruit than pretending to be drinking alcohol imo. I remember getting them as a kid on holiday, although I don't think they were called mocktails then. I don't see the point in buying alcohol free beer for kids but also don't really see the harm.

For what it's worth, I used to pretend refreshers and lovehearts were "tablets" when I was little, I did not go onto develop any addictions to pills!

I don’t think there is anything wrong with them but you’re the Mama, go with your gut.

I do, however, hate reading that people wouldn’t dare spend €8 on a special drink for their children on holiday. I’d happily spend €3 on a wine for myself (if I wanted one) and €8 on a drink for my daughter. She’s not beneath me. Weird.

I love a good mocktail but at that price I'd be saying no too.

This is a classic AIBU of the old school: an OP who is perfectly convinced that they are not in the least unreasonable but who wants to use the thread either for the catharsis of a row that they can’t have IRL or to practise their arguments for the RL showdown.

Brava OP!

I feel the same as this really.

It's about how it is framed.

If it's a 'Virgin Mojito' or 'alcohol free beer' then that feels like it's prepping kids for drinking culture when they're older. It doesn't sit right with me really to encourage kids to drink these things.

It guess for me, it's about whether they use the 'adult' names for it.

But also, most kids don't like the taste of beer and giving them AF beer is a bit weird. You also can't buy it in most shops if you're under 18.

Fun fruit juice mixes / mocktails are fine if they don't have adult cocktail names.

I agree OP. We don’t give kids dummy cigarettes any more,do we? We wouldn’t give kids ‘ pretend’ lines of coke.

I'd say yes to mocktails - DD has one occasionally but they are pricey. No to AF beer or wine because 1) they are usually not 100% AF and can be classed as AF if they are 0.5% and 2) it's developing the taste for booze which is not healthy.

AF beer - no.
Mocktails - sure, why not it's just expensive juice.

Yes I’d let mine have them
and I would also drink AF beer and mocktails with them so they understand not all of the grown up drinks have to be alcoholic

Mocktails - expensive juice but ok (unless saying no for £ reasons)

AF beer or 0% gin etc - not until they’re 16ish

I agree with the OP, it's train them early to get into the drinking culture.
The candy cigarettes stop being sold for a reason, it made them feel smoking was a cool thing they should do it.
Just because some families don't allow alcohol or fake alcohol till kids are of age, doesn't mean they'll turn into alcoholic druggies. Mine weren't given anything and none of them drink much, and aren't druggies.

Jesus, lighten up! I remember on holidays my parents were friends with the owner of a bar and he used to make me and my brother special cocktails, which were basically orange squash and grenadine. I loved it and I’m certainly not an alcoholic (I don’t even drink!)

I agree about them being overpriced but cant get my head round not wanting kids to have fruit juice as a treat. I allow my kids to drink diluted alcohol - I was having diluted alcohol & cocktails since the age of about 8 and have never had a drink problem. I believe very strongly that bringing kids up to see moderate alcohol consumption as a normal part of life is a good thing. I never saw either of my parents drunk.

Why is normalising drinking not ok? Drinking alcohol is one of life's great pleasures?!

There is no healthy level of smoking. Moderate alcohol consumption can be good for you & certainly isnt dangerous in most circumstances, for most people.

I get what you mean OP but at the same time... they're on holiday and I don't think it's doing any harm or worth the agro. Some families would allow their 13 year olds to have an alcoholic drink on holiday so a non alcoholic drink is nothing. I have friends who are t-total and have mocktails, so it's sort of normalising that in a way.