Taking your Dd to public toilets

[Thatsongoverandover]

How do you do it as a family?

Dd is 5 and when with me, we go into the same cubicle together and both go to the loo if needed or just her. I never let her walk there on her own, even if I can see the toilets and so on.
What do/should dads do? It’s generally always me taking Dd for the last few years.

I use those toilets to change my sons bum as the female one doesn't have one or if the other toilet isn't available. I'm pregnant no way I can hold it

Right and what about the next dad who’s out with his daughter? Should they just use the disabled loo too? When does it end?

What about little boys who go in with their dads? They have to pass grown men who are stood up weeing. And don’t tell me “well they’re boys so it doesn’t matter”. At age 5, a boy and a girl are just the same in terms of potentially feeling scared and intimidated. And yet, little boys still have to go in there because it’s just life. They’re with their dad and completely safe. And it’s the same for your dd. I’m sure her dad will swiftly take her in to a cubicle and distract her view away from the men, just like a dad with his 5 year old son would do. She will be absolutely fine with her dad with her.

In fact, because she’s with her dad, your daughter is at much less risk than say, an 8 year old boy who is out with just his mum and has to go in to the men’s toilet on his own. So there you go. Something to think about.

The disabled toilet is a bad idea. Your dd will just have to go in to the men’s with her dad.

Around here most of the baby changing units have a toilet in so we mostly use those. DP will use them if he is out with my 4 year old too.

Once he has had to take her into a cubicle in the men's but he felt really wierd doing it and would choose any other option if it was available. It just didn't feel right to him. He wouldn't dream of going into the ladies with her either obviously.

The proper single occupancy toilet room (with proper walls and full doors that lock) type option is the best for when DP needs to take her. So it's brilliant when we come across these. I think they should have a couple where possible anyway. They tend to be larger and more accessible to most people (including those with pushchairs, walking aids, baby carriers and multiple children)

Disabled toilets accommodate a wheelchair and disabled person. There is no legal requirement for able bodied people not to use them if they have a particular need. The requirement is for an accessible toilet. Not a restriction on the type of person using it.

You could argue differently from a moral point of view but I would say there are all sorts of reasons why someone may be or feel disabled from using the main toilets. Parents with young children is one of them. It’s a matter for each individual and their conscience.

But it shouldn’t be when it leads to a disabled person being in the potentially very embarrassing position of being unable to access the only toilet which could come close to meeting there needs.

disabled toilet provision in most places is shocking as it is without people using them simply because they can’t work out how to do a sensible alternative.

Why? They’re weeing, not having a wank. They’re not even facing your child. Just walk past with her and take her into a cubicle.

I would never send kids into a toilet on their own. If I'm with them I take them myself, if their dad has them he'll use a disabled toilet. He wouldn't take them into the men's because have you seen men's toilets 🤮

Another person who thinks disabled facilities are there for their children's benefit.

Sadly the ease at which people use disabled facilities without a second thought shows how many people still see people with disabilities as second class citizen.

Near were I live theres a well used splash park. A 7 year old girl was raped last year in the toilets there. No one should be sending kids off to the toilets on their own it's not safe.

If kids can get assaulted on a adventure playground at legoland they can get assaulted anywhere.

That doesn't prevent your husband from being respectful of disabled facilities.

@ilovesooty well he's not taking them into the men's and he can't go into the ladies so yeah he'll use the disabled loos.

I know. Your son needs those facilities and the attitudes and behaviour of posters who think their children are entitled to use them must be so hard for you.

There's no reason why he can't use the men's toilets. Your attitude is appalling.

DD1 is 4 and if DH is taking her to the toilet he takes her into gents into a cubicle. I will let her go into the ladies on her own at places like soft play etc if I can see the door or am nearby. She's quite happy to do so. If it's somewhere unfamiliar or complicated to get to the toilets I will go with her.

Entitled and selfish. Why should a disabled person have to be disadvantaged ffs

How lovely to have a two-minute disability and then be able to ping back to a life that is fully accessible- simply because you couldn’t stand the thought of your non-disabled children having to wait a nano-second more for a toilet. I’ll gladly swap you the 24//7 difficulties of living with and managing a child who is blind in the face of such horrible entitlement.

Is your disability that you don't understand all disabled people are not the same?

Also the use of the word 'nipping' to suggest the toilet trip would be quicker than if using the regular loos, what's that about? Nobody 'nips' to the toilet with a small child. It takes them time to use the toilet, sort their clothes and wash and dry hands. No nipping involved, that's using language designed to mini ones what's happening.

*minimise

A young girl was raped in the ladies toilets at a restaurant near me a few years ago. Absolutely horrifying. The man was just waiting inside the cubicle for her.

@ilovesooty the men's toilets is no place for little girls. My girls don't even go into the bathroom when their dads using it. How's he going to walk them past a load of strange men. Cop yourself on.

It's no different DH taking my son or my daughter to the gents when they are with him. You're being ridiculous and entirely unreasonable about the disabled toilets.

It's no different DH taking my son or my daughter to the gents when they are with him. You're being ridiculous and entirely unreasonable about the disabled toilets.

I have a disability and if I have to wait for the disabled toilet I will shit myself in public. This is not hyperbole, it has happened.