Page 3 | I am so over pronouns.

ginandbearit · 08/08/2023 07:47

Well my first name is very commonly a female one in the USA but more a male one here and in Australia and NZ, and I'm male , so I should use "he/him' to clarify things but it is more amusing to see the confusion when a US citizen contacts me...

ChubbyMorticia · 08/08/2023 07:47

Could be just my experience, but I’ve found that people who talk about how tired they are of pronouns, etc, get fairly upset if someone refers to them by the wrong one.

Theeyeballsinthesky · 08/08/2023 07:50

I recently visited a free women's legal service in a professional capacity and their practice is to use their pronouns (she/her- it's an entirely female organisation) in all publications and on their website as a way to reassure women that when they seek legal advice they will be speaking with a woman.

well that’s total bollocks to start with! I work with a TW who uses she/her & describes themself as a lesbian so no the use of she/her doesn’t mean you’ll get an actual woman. I mean ffs this is basic stuff - how do people not understand this?

Ridemeginger · 08/08/2023 07:50

DinnaeFashYersel · 08/08/2023 07:45

She/they

I know someone who uses she/they.

Im convinced she does this to deliberately provoke people to get it wrong.

Being “incorrectly pronouned” is the only way for otherwise extremely privileged people to claim victimhood, which holds an unfathomable social cache in the West at present. If you are not a victim of some prejudice or other, you are not only a nobody, you are also, by default, an oppressor.

TheOpeningActofSpring · 08/08/2023 07:52

timetorefresh · 08/08/2023 04:38

I'd actually assume that would mean I may not speak with a woman, but end up with someone identifying as a woman. If they make it clear they are a female only organisation, using the biological definition, then there's no need for the pronouns

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This. With bells on!

AdoptedBumpkin · 08/08/2023 07:53

I've noticed 'she/her' is a lot more common than 'he/him' on sites like LinkedIn, which I find both strange and worrying.

Theeyeballsinthesky · 08/08/2023 07:54

I find it hilarious that people think being referred to as male when you’re not or vice versa is ooooh so traumatising - again ffs! I used to have really really short hair - my sisters new bf looking at old photo albums saw a photo of me from behind wearing a bomber jacket & asked who that boy was. Astonishingly I survived this appalling misgendering without collapsing onto my fainting couch clutching my pearls. I just laughed and said “I look a bit different now”

CurrentHun · 08/08/2023 07:55

I recently visited a free women's legal service in a professional capacity and their practice is to use their pronouns (she/her- it's an entirely female organisation) in all publications and on their website as a way to reassure women that when they seek legal advice they will be speaking with a woman.

No. Are you for real?
Any organisation using gender identity markers (ie requiring pronouns to be given as standard) is doing the literal opposite of ‘reassuring’ any service user that any staff member who uses female pronouns will be actually of the female sex.

Either this organisation is very confused about what gender identity is and doesn’t realise that it has nothing whatsoever to do with biological sex, or you are.

This is a massive problem because for some women, knowing that they can definitely only deal with a woman at that service, will be the difference between using that service which they really need, or not using it at all.

TheOpeningActofSpring · 08/08/2023 07:55

Theeyeballsinthesky · 08/08/2023 07:50

I recently visited a free women's legal service in a professional capacity and their practice is to use their pronouns (she/her- it's an entirely female organisation) in all publications and on their website as a way to reassure women that when they seek legal advice they will be speaking with a woman.

well that’s total bollocks to start with! I work with a TW who uses she/her & describes themself as a lesbian so no the use of she/her doesn’t mean you’ll get an actual woman. I mean ffs this is basic stuff - how do people not understand this?

Yes, especially as these days gender identity tops biological sex when it comes to pronouns and sexuality. Absolute ridiculous.

JudgeAnderson · 08/08/2023 08:01

Could be just my experience, but I’ve found that people who talk about how tired they are of pronouns, etc, get fairly upset if someone refers to them by the wrong one.

Wrong. I don't care at all.

MockneyReject · 08/08/2023 08:01

ChubbyMorticia · 08/08/2023 07:47

Could be just my experience, but I’ve found that people who talk about how tired they are of pronouns, etc, get fairly upset if someone refers to them by the wrong one.

I'd say it is just your experience.
I'm frequently called Sir and referred to by incorrect sex pronouns, by people who embrace them. They assume that because 'misgendering' would traumatise them, that it would do the same to me. It doesn't. I'm yet to see a GC feminist upset by this silly, transparent attempt to upset them. I've seen plenty roll their eyes and move on, though.
When I was younger, and 'presented' neutrally, just like most of my social group did, I was frequently mistaken for a man/lad. Never once did it upset me. It mildly amused me, if anything.

Cowlover89 · 08/08/2023 08:05

Yanbu

User63847484848 · 08/08/2023 08:08

It’s absurd. And immediately makes the person using them at the end of their email etc (when it’s voluntary) go down in my estimations and gets an eye roll. Especially if they’re over 21. The young uns I cut more slack.

CurrentHun · 08/08/2023 08:08

Not one female I know who has been called a bloke mistakenly, gives a crap about that. Much more worried (rightly) about everyday homophobia/lesbophobia which definitely affects them negatively.

Kilopascal · 08/08/2023 08:09

people think being referred to as male when you’re not or vice versa is ooooh so traumatising

Isn't it more the people being referred to as male when they are male but don't see themselves that way?

FOJN · 08/08/2023 08:12

I recently visited a free women's legal service in a professional capacity and their practice is to use their pronouns (she/her- it's an entirely female organisation) in all publications and on their website as a way to reassure women that when they seek legal advice they will be speaking with a woman.

She/her pronouns do not mean you will speak to a woman. In fact they signal that the organisation has bought into gender ideology which increases the chance you will end up speaking to someone who is male but using she/her pronouns.

Pretending it's to reassure women when it doesn't mean women seeking legal advice will speak to a woman is gaslighting. It also signals that you are not welcome if don't believe humans can change sex. Asserting that it costs nothing is also gaslighting.

User1367349 · 08/08/2023 08:12

TheDogAndDogAtCrutchley · 08/08/2023 01:09

I don’t care if I never hear another pronoun again. It’s not like they’re moving grammar along nicely now, is it?

And yet you used a pronoun four times in your original post.

FiddleLeaf · 08/08/2023 08:12

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GreenWheat · 08/08/2023 08:12

ChubbyMorticia · 08/08/2023 07:47

Could be just my experience, but I’ve found that people who talk about how tired they are of pronouns, etc, get fairly upset if someone refers to them by the wrong one.

Have you really found that or would it just be convenient for your narrative. I am a woman, have an obviously female. definitely look like one, nobody has ever referred to me as he. I don't know why they would but I wouldn't care. And I am definitely tired of pronouns.

Theeyeballsinthesky · 08/08/2023 08:13

Kilopascal · 08/08/2023 08:09

people think being referred to as male when you’re not or vice versa is ooooh so traumatising

Isn't it more the people being referred to as male when they are male but don't see themselves that way?

Yes but that’s not what PP was saying. PP were saying that it was pppl who complained most about pronouns were upset if ‘misgendered’ implying we are hypocrites

but you’re right - the ppl who push pronouns the hardest are ppl who want everyone to lie about biological sex

Theeyeballsinthesky · 08/08/2023 08:14

This is why calling a man she/her can get in the bin

GreenWheat · 08/08/2023 08:15

It's nearly always either people trying to highlight how speshul they are, or workplaces trying to showcase woke capitalism. Thankfully nobody has ever asked me to use they/them and I would not be pandering to it if they did.

WhiteFire · 08/08/2023 08:16

I've noticed 'she/her' is a lot more common than 'he/him' on sites like LinkedIn, which I find both strange and worrying.

This is my experience also, and your thoughts on it are shared. It is less about support for a group of individuals and more about #BeKind (#shutupandputup) and keeping women in line. I find it more worrying when it is women professionally involved with VAWG.

FOJN · 08/08/2023 08:17

ChubbyMorticia · 08/08/2023 07:47

Could be just my experience, but I’ve found that people who talk about how tired they are of pronouns, etc, get fairly upset if someone refers to them by the wrong one.

Really? As in office based meltdown, accusations of someone committing literal violence, making a tearful tiktok about the trauma caused?

I call bullshit.

I've received plenty of letters and phone calls over the years from people looking for Mr FJON because they made an assumption about my sex. I've managed to simply correct them and move on without drama.

jeaux90 · 08/08/2023 08:18

If someone asks at work I say "I am post pronouns"

I love the confusion on their face, like they've missed out on something.

I won't be gaslit.