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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is once a week too often to talk to a parent?

129 replies

Kowaii · 03/08/2023 19:43

I usually try and FaceTime my dad once a week as my kids love speaking to him (he lives quite far away) and I like speaking to my siblings (who are all children).

Apparently this is causing issues with his wife who has told me it’s not approx to disturb their family life so often and it’s weird that as an adult I want to speak to my father so often. I actually went years without speaking to him at one point, but I am happy with where things are now and my children really love him and miss him.

Aibu? Should I cut it down or is the wife the one being unreasonable? I know she doesn’t not like me at all but I feel she should just kind of get over that like I’ve had to.

OP posts:
FFSDILIGAF · 03/08/2023 19:56

Better still show her this thread so she can see what a twunt she is.

WtP · 03/08/2023 19:57

I talk to my In Laws almost every day, sadly both my parents are gone & I get on well with my In Laws so they are like my mum & dad now?
I'm late 50's BTW

catandcoffee · 03/08/2023 20:01

She actually phoned you and said this, what was your reply to her?

Don't let her dictate to you OP, what a jealousy woman she is.

TrianglePlayer · 03/08/2023 20:02

I speak to my dad every day. It means so much to both of us.

BHRK · 03/08/2023 20:03

She sounds nasty and horrible! Continue to FaceTime your dad, what a lovely way for him to see his grandchildren. I speak to my dad about 3 times a week

britespark1 · 03/08/2023 20:05

We had similar when my dad remarried. She told him we weren’t allowed to visit more than once a month after moving him further away.

Mumof3premies · 03/08/2023 20:06

Wtf I’ve spoken to my mum 9 times today and my dad twice 😂😂
we speak at least once a day and FaceTime 3/4 times a week! My dads on the rigs and is away for 6 months at a time so we only see him 2 times a year and I tell my mum about everything that happens in my day 😂

Original poster
Kowaii · 03/08/2023 20:12

I just hung up on her, didn’t say anything! God I hate her so much.

OP posts:
WhatInTheFuckery · 03/08/2023 20:18

I speak to my parents most days, text them about random shit or we'll give each other a ring and have a chat if we're not doing anything. Also see each of them usually once a week (they're seperated). Nobody would be telling me I'm not speaking to them, neither of my DPs would have it either

Ireallywantsomechips · 03/08/2023 20:24

This is awful OP! Are they your full siblings or half siblings? Just hoping she’s nicer to them….

Serendipitoushedgehog · 03/08/2023 20:25

She sounds really possessive. My DH talks to his family once a week and I call mine more. Is she controlling in other ways as well?

drpet49 · 03/08/2023 20:25

MavisChunch29 · 03/08/2023 19:48

She can fuck off to the far side of fuck.

This. Wife sounds like a complete bitch.

openthecurtainsagain · 03/08/2023 20:25

I speak to my elderly dad at least twice a day. He rings me or I ring him and we have a good chat and sort out all the world's problems. I'm fortunate that despite being in his late 70s, my dad is very tech savvy and happily does WhatsApp, email, Facebook and YouTube.

Your dad should lead on this. What does he want? That's all that matters.

Emmamoo89 · 03/08/2023 20:28

YADNBU she sounds like a cunt x

Original poster
Kowaii · 03/08/2023 20:31

They’re my half siblings but I love them very much. She’s just always wished that I didn’t exist really. I think she really hates that my dad had a life before her.

OP posts:
Dymaxion · 03/08/2023 20:33

That is well within the boundaries of perfectly normal. Mine have a tendency to drop round unnannouced, which can be tricky, so she should thank her lucky lobsters Smile

MansfieldLark · 03/08/2023 20:34

I speak to my parents at least once a day.

Nowthenhere · 03/08/2023 20:34

Whilst I appreciate that adults are the ones responsible for facilitating a relationship with their children and making the effort to ensure they stay in the child's life, your Father does want a relationship with his Grandchildren... he may be being abused or he might just like a quiet life but I would continue to support your children's relationship with their grandfather by not entertaining this woman's bizarre and controlling ways.

smilingthroughgrittedteeth · 03/08/2023 20:38

I text/whatsapp my mum daily, speak to her once or twice a week and see her every saturday your SM is the unreasonable one

Christmas202 · 03/08/2023 20:41

I talk to my mum at least five times a day and daddy once if not twice everyday.

caringcarer · 03/08/2023 20:56

Your step Mum sounds a nasty piece of work. I'd ask your Dad if he likes you to call to chat to you and his dgc each week. If he says yes keep doing it. Step mum can FO.

caringcarer · 03/08/2023 20:58

I chat to my MiL once a week on the phone. Sadly my parents are both dead now but I love my MiL. I chat to her more than DH does.

SkinnyMalinkyLankyLegs · 03/08/2023 20:58

Tell her thank you for her opinion but you will speak to your father whenever you like.

Stressfordays · 03/08/2023 20:59

Sdpbody · 03/08/2023 19:54

I call my parents approximately 34,567 a day. I'm needy as fuck though.

Same 🤣

Neverseenbefore · 03/08/2023 21:00

once a week is completely fine and normal. It’s up to you and your dad. I FaceTime my parents every couple of days.