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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Reddit is.. interesting

31 replies

Ryvitas · 03/08/2023 07:06

Somehow ended up in a dark hole,there are pages and pages of celebrities being rated on their looks. Anyone from Kate Middleton to Katy Perry, Margot Robbie, Natalie Portman, anyone well-known.
They're all given a mark out of 10, and are heavily scrutinised on their looks. Candice Swanepoel cannot be a 10 because her nose is a bit too wide and hooked apparently, Margot Robbie's mouth is too large, Natalie Portman has 'lost her looks' now at 42 and aged really badly.
Anyone over 30 is 'past their prime' (literally) , they frequently say stuff like 'Candice in her prime was beautiful '.
This is both men and women rating.
I mean it's not surprising that stuff like this exists, but it's just sad. It really shows the ageism we experience and the double standards. There are pages about male celebrities too, but they're not considered 'past their best ' over 30.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ryvitas · 03/08/2023 07:09

I'm really not in the whole 'looks fade' camp. In fact I despise that term. You aren't less beautiful because you're older, you just look older. Maybe your looks fade if you stop bothering with them, it's not a given though. It's so sad that people subscribe to all of this.

OP posts:
JMSA · 03/08/2023 07:10

I couldn't read that stuff. I'd be apoplectic with rage! Angry

Sparklesocks · 03/08/2023 07:23

Reddit has thousands of subs depending on your interest but unfortunately that includes mean spirited ones that attract nastiness. Best to give them a wide berth.

Hufflepods · 03/08/2023 07:26

It’s not really Reddit though is it? It’s like pointing out one single thread on MN and claiming all female user think X.
You are the one giving these pages hits.
I used Reddit and I can’t say I’ve ever come across stuff like this because it isn’t the material I’m interested in.

Calistano · 03/08/2023 07:27

You must have searched for this though, the one thing that is good about reddit is the ability to only see subs you are interested in. If you are browsing r/all be thankful they removed all the porn, used to be wall to wall tits and fannies.

backoffbuster · 03/08/2023 07:49

I agree that sounds horrid. But I’m a regular Reddit user and have never come across these threads. In fact I find that the areas I frequent on Reddit can be more kind and considered than their mumsnet equivalents.

determinedtomakethiswork · 03/08/2023 07:52

I think everybody on Reddit who makes a comment on that sort of thing should have a photo of themselves posted. Or, two photos. One showing them at their best and one showing them at their worst.

itsmyp4rty · 03/08/2023 07:53

There are plenty of men whose looks have faded IMO. Leonardo Dicaprio certainly isn't the beauty he once was. Patrick Swayze didn't age well. Robbie Williams, Johnny Depp, Russell Crowe and a lot of the members of boy bands/pop bands that were big in the 90's. They could all be picked over just as easily but the difference is that men just aren't judged on their looks the way women are - or expected to keep them forever. They are allowed to be adored and respected for other reasons as they age - but women without looks are generally considered low worth.

HoneyIShrunkThePizza · 03/08/2023 07:54

backoffbuster · 03/08/2023 07:49

I agree that sounds horrid. But I’m a regular Reddit user and have never come across these threads. In fact I find that the areas I frequent on Reddit can be more kind and considered than their mumsnet equivalents.

I agree with this, all the subs I've been on are nice communities

cinnamonfrenchtoast · 03/08/2023 07:59

The beauty of Reddit is that you only have to look at the stuff you're interested in.

I've been a member on there for years and never see the kind of thing you describe.

Original poster
Ryvitas · 03/08/2023 10:35

I searched Margot Robbie as I've watched the Barbie film and then managed to find all that. No actually, I'm not generalising, I'm just stating what ive seen 😂 but I think half of these people writing are just bitter men tbh.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ryvitas · 03/08/2023 10:36

Agreed there's a lot of nicer stuff there luckily.

OP posts:
VikingVolva · 03/08/2023 10:41

I had to vote YABU, because Reddit is simply a collection of topics in which people chat.

Not every topic is pleasant. Things that are so wrong as to be criminal can be taken down, but other than that discussion remains.

As you say yourself "there's a lot of nicer stuff there" too

Would you think it would be a fair description of MN if someone had only looked at the feistier threads in AIBU? Or if you were a campaigner against ageism, what would you say about S&B?

Smokeslow · 03/08/2023 10:48

YANBU Reddit is chock full of men who hate women and see them as nothing more than wank fodder. The Natalie Portman one is disturbing because they are likely fixated on her in Leon and she was 12 years old when she filmed that movie. You can comfort yourself safe in the knowledge that most of these males will likely never touch a woman in real life so hopefully no actual women will have to put up with them and we can just ignore them.

Yajebbend · 03/08/2023 10:48

What about tattle life. It’s just so awful that I can’t believe people are so nasty. Give me gentle mumsnet any day

pikantna · 03/08/2023 10:49

No site is full of loveliness. There are plenty of threads on MN that get discussed on other sites and the nastiness remarked upon.

Original poster
Ryvitas · 03/08/2023 10:51

Yes agree re tattle too, it's terrible. Indeed there are awful threads everywhere, it just shows how disturbing some men's minds are.

OP posts:
user123212 · 03/08/2023 10:55

this is why i don't support/read Reddit. full of incels.

Barbadossunset · 03/08/2023 10:57

I’ve seen quite a few threads on here in which men’s looks are commented on pretty viciously.

RitaFires · 03/08/2023 10:58

I went with YABU because you're unlikely to find that kind of content without looking for it. It's really easy to just read the subreddits you like and avoid the toxicity. Even on r/all today there's news about Justin Trudeau separating, some maps and a photogenic cheetah, all completely inoffensive.

SiegmeyerOfCatarina · 03/08/2023 11:06

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

araiwa · 03/08/2023 11:11

He must be hung like a horse to get the women he does. The state of him.

Mumsnet is........ Interesting

PorpoiseWithPurpose · 03/08/2023 11:13

The people wasting time on that shit are rated at all “1s or 2s”. .

pontipinemum · 03/08/2023 11:20

I only use reddit for book stuff, recipes, baking and to read AITA because that can be bonkers!! I would advise those other ones they sound shit and I'd get too angry!!

Can be good for random tech questions as well.

GoingToBeLessRubbishAtLife · 03/08/2023 11:39

I’ve subscribed to lots of subs on Reddit. I find each one of them much kinder than some Mumsnet threads. I just read one here about a woman who split with her ex two months ago and he’s got a new partner already. The names he’s being called are outrageous. It’s not even worth joining in to say ‘well he was single……..’ as you’ll be shouted down.

If you go looking for shit on Reddit you’ll find it. If you go looking for shit in your local high street you’ll find it. Some people are shit, most aren’t.

There are some incredibly supportive and wholesome subs there. I’ve never searched out a female (or male) celebrity so have never seen those subs.