To think America Ferrera’s speech in Barbie isn’t that great?

[Prrambulate]

BARBIE SPOILERS BELOW

Everyone seems to be raving about this moment in the Barbie movie - possibly worthy of an Oscar nomination, and a quintessential characterisation of what it’s like to be a women in modern society.

I thought it was lacklustre. There are parts of it that ring true - the incessant need to be likeable - but they’re kind of cliched. And other parts I just don’t agree with (love your kids but don’t talk about them all time, ie retain a semblance of identity beyond motherhood. Isn’t that a good thing? And who’s saying we always have to be grateful? I feel there’s much more collective understanding now about the challenges of being a woman and/or mother…)

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Speech:

”It is literally impossible to be a woman. You are so beautiful, and so smart, and it kills me that you don’t think you’re good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow we’re always doing it wrong.

You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can’t ask for money because that’s crass.

You have to be a boss, but you can’t be mean. You have to lead, but you can’t squash other people’s ideas. You’re supposed to love being a mother, but don’t talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman, but also always be looking out for other people.

You have to answer for men’s bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you’re accused of complaining. You’re supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you’re supposed to be a part of the sisterhood.

But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful. You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line.

It’s too hard! It’s too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault.

I’m just so tired of watching myself and every single other woman tie herself into knots so that people will like us. And if all of that is also true for a doll just representing women, then I don’t even know.”

It's nothing new to most adult women, but if it gets young girls thinking/talking about it, that can't be a bad thing

Sounds a bit deep for Barbie 😂. (I haven't seen it).

I actually thought it was perfect. She was speaking generically about what everyone woman, no matter her race or class, experiences on some level. Or what they have seen other women experience. That scene got a round of applause in my cinema!

Although I prefer this speech but maybe not suitable for a 12A 😂

There are parts of it that ring true - the incessant need to be likeable - but they’re kind of cliched.

Isn't it supposed to be a collection of cliches? And she puts them together to make it clear how they contradict each other. I found it a bit cringey when I was watching it, but I think what works well is that it all leads up to a conclusion about the expectation that women should be likeable.

But it's all true, a woman's place is in the wrong. One of the biggest harms taught to girls/women is that you can have it all so then we end constantly chasing an impossible ideal instead of simply being good enough and accepting that good enough will be differing from person to person.

It's quite basic but good for a movie based on a kids toy. It's good they focused on a mother cos there seems to be an anti mother/older woman sentiment creeping in with the younger generation (I say this as a non mother but just something I've noticed with Gen Z). I thought it was nice that at the end the mother and daughter understood each other more and realised their struggles were connected. I'd love to see that explored more but Barbie probably isn't the movie to do it 😆

There are parts of it that ring true - the incessant need to be likeable - but they’re kind of cliched.

They're cliched because they're been so true for so long, and any time someone says them, they get criticised for it. That was the point!

Does it need to be great? It's just nice for it to be said and given mainstream attention.

The fact that she said it and someone jumps on here to denigrate it is kind of on point.

Good to educate the younger generation.

Thought the film was genius actually. Tempt in the youth with pink fluff and glamour then zap them with a feminist pro mother agenda. Well done Greta!

I thought it was a great speech and totally tallied my experience of being a woman.

Right, I see the point about younger women in particular not being as exposed to / accustomed to these ideas (which are so often discussed and dissected here).

After watching it, I was team Ken!

I loved it. Saw it with my DDs (17&22) and was surprised to see their reactions.
I had to hold my hands in my lap to stop myself applauding her speech.
Thought it to be an amazing empowering film in many ways.
Love it!!

The content’s ok but it’s really badly written.

You only have to spend a day on MN though to see that absolutely every point made rings true around many women.

Putting the whole thing into a single place just shows the absolutely ridiculous expectations society has of women, that women have of themselves and that women hold over other women, Only today I've read a thread of a someone being sneered at for putting her child in nursery when she's not at work. Choosing between jobs to select a career or a homelife. Thinking a man has another woman because his toothbrush isn't there. another being blamed for her husbands texting another woman because she works too much and isn't giving him enough attention.

Like a PP said - perfectly - 'a woman's place is in the wrong'

Totally agree. As other PPs have said, maybe it’s revolutionary if you’re 15 and have never been on the internet/listened to female singers/read articles or books about feminism, but I felt embarrassed that this was the big pay-off revelation meant to turn everything around.

Also, many of these problems are caused by capitalism, and Barbie’s very existence, and her modelling of the American Dream, is all about the pursuit and support of capitalism. It’s such a shallow understanding of feminism, society, and existence.

But the teens in the screening with me loved it

The sentiment is great but it’s all be said and done before, and it sort of cringed me out a little. I felt that way about the movie as a whole. A little bit wishy washy. But agree if it gets younger women thinking about it then that’s fab. I think the movie thinks it’s cleverer than it actually is. Also America Ferreira is classically beautiful and so was the actress who played her daughter, I’d love to see actual facially average looking women on screen but it’s that one step too far even for Greta gerwig.

I’ve read better on Mumsnet. There’s been some cracking rants on here over the years. But, I wasn’t expecting that in the Barbie film and it’s certainly well intentioned.

My 15-year-old DD cried...

My response to the film was that it looked good, made me laugh and left me feeling good. Not every movie has to be life-changing or perspective altering.

What is more interesting to me is that, like anything that is aimed at women or primarily involves women, it is excoriated for not being perfect. One of the best things about it is it has drawn out a lot of male commentators who hate it because it's for girls. It saves women from having to find that out the hard way, because those men will tell you themselves 😁

It's not instructional, it's talking about what is wrongly expected in general of every woman. Think you have taken it in the wrong context.

What is more interesting to me is that, like anything that is aimed at women or primarily involves women, it is excoriated for not being perfect.

Too true.

It’s a 12A film; I think hoping for Germaine Greer-level feminism is a bit much for a mass market teen friendly blockbuster.
😂

The fact we’re taking this film - created by, directed by, produced by, and starring women - to task for not being perfect rather proves the point, doesn’t it?

It's been done a bazillion times before (see Cynthia Nixon's similar version) but that's the point, it still needs to be said.
The comparitor is Kendom (boozy trash) vs Barbieland (Nobel prizes and presidents)...

Also, many of these problems are caused by capitalism, and Barbie’s very existence, and her modelling of the American Dream, is all about the pursuit and support of capitalism.
I'm pretty sure they covered this.