To not keep child home with a fever?

[caggie3]

I never know if I should keep my son home every time he's poorly or if I over react due to him being born and growing up during covid times, but I always do. Sickness bugs always but also colds, coughs, fevers. His attendance in his school nursery was only 68%. He's missed out on trips and days out etc. He woke up with a fever this morning, he's sat playing and it isn't bothering him but he is red and sweaty. He's meant to be going to a dinosaur park today and I said we won't go now he's poorly and he's crying that he wants to go and he feels fine. It just feels like I'm doing something awful letting him go out when he could be ill but as I said I don't know if that's just because having a child in covid times made me think that's the norm

So would I be unreasonable to let him go?! AIBU to not keep him home with a fever?

I don't know why some people are struggling to understand your post or are being a bit shitty but hey ho.
What's his temperature @caggie3? If it's around 38 then I'd probably dose him up and see how he goes. If it's closer to 40, I wouldn't chance taking him out I don't think. Try to do something fun at home instead!
Also, would it be just an hour or so, or a whole day out?

I have kids the same age op.

Snotty noses, into school with tissues. They know how to wipe their noses even if they need reminding. We'd never leave the house if they stayed home with every snotty nose. Reality is they'll have germs, other kids with get them, other kids will give them, thus the immunity circle of life.

Fever, lethargic etc., I'd keep off for but they're walking the school run regardless cos I have 3. So if they were acting fine, I'd pop them in uniform and see how they fare.

Sickness and diarrhea, I'd follow schools advice. It isn't automatic 48 hours. DS, 8, has vomitted at school and they've kept him because he felt fine.

However, your child is still infectious and should avoid going around others

only if what’s causing the fever (if it is an actual fever) is contagious. Teething, urine infections, digestion upset can all cause raised temperatures but aren’t infectious.

He may even of just overheated in bed. My dd runs very warm when she’s asleep and still buries herself under the covers/mountain of soft toys.

Are you seriously going to sit there and try and "correct" pregnancy everything I comment, seriously just stop.

I mean't everything, pregnancy was a mistake stupid auto correct

I imagine having a baby during covid was stressful and not "natural" so.i can see why parents are wary of taking kids out.

I'd take him to the dinosaur park if he feels fine, give him some calpol if needed.

Yes it's stressful having a baby born in covid pandemic but regardless they are th I same as any other child that's the point I am trying to make, children pick up bugs and all sorts because of weaker immune system than adults also exposed to when going to nursery /school

normal temperature in babies and children is about 36.4C, but this can vary slightly from child to child.
A high temperature is 38C or more.
If your child has a high temperature, they might:

• feel hotter than usual when you touch their back or chest
• feel sweaty
• look or feel unwell

@caggie3 Thought this can help you, all the best

I meant perspective can change if its a first baby now toddler anxiety probably sets in and decisions are hard to make. I agree though kids pick up all sorts.

Presumably you're only checking temperature because you've noticed a change in your child's behaviour and demeanour that would indicate illness? Temperature can fluctuate slightly so I guess it depends what you are considering to be 'high' and what the other symptoms are. If my child was running at 38 and otherwise fine, I'd probably send them in.

I don't think a fever with no other symptoms needs to stop a child doing anything the actually want to do. If they're feeling droopy, then yes of course stay home. But if they're a bit warm but raring to go, then I reckon there's no need. Treat the child, not the number.

Working parents don't have this luxury, it's a spoonful of calpol and off you go, no employer could allow their staff to be off so much.

My dcs school said to me (years ago) they could tell which kids had stay at home mums or grandparents close by attendance records ... makes you think.

If a child is unwell they shouldn't be in school, if it's a low grade fever and no other signs then I would send mine in, ditto mild coughs and colds. They both had close to full attendance right through primary (dd1 had different issues in secondary). If a child is really unwell 32% of the time they either have serious illness issues/disabilities or something else is going on, it's a very high illness rate

Minor Coughs/colds I would perhaps send them in if they seem fine. Fevers I would not send them in. How long has your DC been in nursery? For the first few months my DC was off probably just as much as yours.

As someone who has spent the last week struggling with two very unwell babies who have been in hospital with some horrible virus (one who is only 3 months old) keep your sick kids at home. Your kid might be fine with a temperature and able to cope but the next child might not be. I do have a primary school child who I keep off if he is unwell because I don’t want to infect others.

Selfish for the sake of a day out, just go tomorrow.

Didn’t even realise I’d picked up on more than one of your posts?

If I don’t particularly agree with something you’ve said then probably. It’s a forum, people are allowed to do that.

It’s your issue if you’re taking that personally.

So you were planning on taking him on a day out, just the 2 of you?

What is his actual temperature? With a thermometer?

If he has above 38 and poorly or if it doesn't come down with Calpol, just stay home. Under 38- he's feeling fine. He's not actually ill...

I've always kept mine off for all fevers because you just don't know how it will play out.
sometimes calpol and ibroprufin just doesn't work and twice my kid has ended up in hospital....once with a fever at 41 which they presumed could be meningitis and the second tike he was admitted for 8 days as they thought he had a blood infection but when that came back as clear they had to contact specialists from another city.
As a parent, my kid is my responsibility responsibility I can't see if he's going to be OK.
I also used to work in a primary school for reception and all too often I noticed teachers just telling kids to go and sit down ....they don't look after them or send them home like you think they will.

It’s your issue if you’re taking that personally.
Likewise @Cornettoninja

You asked me a direct question and I answered it @Usernameunknownfornow . You’re the one getting prickly for no good reason.

@caggie3 Also agree with the pp stating it's not a good idea to take him out with high fever even if given medication

A febrile seizure can happen when a child has a high temperature (fever).
Your child may:

• become stiff and twitch, shake, or have jerking movements
• become unconscious
• not respond or look at you when you talk to them
• be sick or pee (wet themselves)
• be sleepy, irritable or confused for up to 1 hour afterwards

Febrile seizures usually last for 2 to 3 minutes. It's rare for them to last more than 10 minutes. They usually affect children between 6 months and 6 years old.

He was just red hot to touch so assumed fever, weirdly the thermometer isn't showing a fever but he's very hot to touch

Then he doesn't have a fever. He's maybe just hot?
And he feels fine
I think his 68% may not have been entirely necessary...

@caggie3 you do have to trust the equipment you have (have you tried the thermometer on yourself?).

It may be that you’re running colder than usual so your ds feels hotter to you.

Yes I also think that might be the case that I've been keeping him off too much, which I have said that I'm worried is the case so it isn't something I'm unaware of. He's only 3 and it's a school nursery so thankfully it isn't a big deal this year but will be when he goes into reception so I just want to feel more confident in making these calls. I don't point out him being a covid baby as an excuse for him being ill more, just having a baby in covid times he wasn't allowed to his old private nursery for most symptoms, the GP wouldn't see him without a test being done for certain things, it was very much err on the side of caution and I think I've struggled to know what to do in more normal times, my reaction for everything is to isolate until I know what it is or he's better