That Mumsnet should drop the D?

[PlinkPlonkFizz]

Adding D to all family, friends and pets is ridiculous! To see adults referring to their "DH" who has subjected them to assault or abuse is particularly nauseating. And DDog! FFS! Is it not just time to drop the D?

What we really need is a like button for posts like this one. 👍😂😁

I find it a bit childish to be honest.

People do just say H when they are pissed off with him! Or "D"H.

Other than that though, you kind of need the D part - all the alternatives don't work.

Referring by name e.g. Brian, Joe. We have no idea who that is, is it your husband, brother, son or dog?? Also privacy issues. Most people don't want to use real names.

Using a relationship descriptor e.g. my son, my husband, my daughter. Clunky and doesn't flow in a conversation. You need a noun that you can substitute for the name rather than writing "my youngest daughter" 12 times in one post or constantly using he/she and not knowing which person that refers to. DD2 is easier, and everybody knows what it means.

Use a single letter e.g, S, D, H. Except for H which tends to be clear, it's just not used enough so tends to have the same issue as using full name.

DH/DS/etc predates MN and has been internet forum vernacular since the old usenet groups and email chains etc. It might not be perfect, but it works well enough and there's no need to reinvent the wheel.

I think you meant DFunsponge! 🧽

It all gets a bit much but I must admit I chuckle at DFish! I should maybe use DGuineaPig(s) when I write about them. They really are dear to me though , I suppose it's heartening that so many MNetters consider their MIL to deserve a D!

Ffs just don't use it if you don't like it. Use it if you do. It's just a thing here and has been for years and years. No one gives a shiny shit whether you use it or not. You do you.

It used to be DS1 = oldest son, DS2 = second oldest son etc and DS (3) = my son (who is 3)

Now people seem to use DS3 to mean my 3yo son. So it could mean either. I mainly use the original version, mainly because the moment that I changed from writing just DS to DS1/DS2 was very special to me (we had a 10 year gap and DS2 took about 2 years to conceive) but I do try to mention ages in the post so that it's clear. I think DS3 = 3yo DS probably does make more logical sense.

Who won't? Are you expecting MNHQ to issue an edict, like the Ten Commandments?

Or insert some form of autocorrect that converts 'DH' to 'H', or 'husband'? (I once frequented a board which automatically replaced words or letter combinations it considered offensive with which meant that entirely innocent references to Scunthorpe became Shorpe.)

People saying it makes it easier to write, but it doesn't make it easier to read, having to parse sentences like "DSiL's DS, my DNiL, shares DNA with my DGF's GF".

The worst is when people are describing an absolute prick of a partner that’s cheated etc. and they call them DH…there’s nothing dear about them!

It's not a mumsnet thing, it's an Internet thing.

I often call my dog Ddog to, but in our case it means 'daft dog' 😂

Nobody has ever proposed this before.

The 'D' predates MN by man years.

And it saves a lot of typing. Instead of you saying 'Your mother should' I can just say ''DM should'.

Absolutely not. There are already far too many posts from men who want to justify their behaviour to their OH.

I think DS3 is 3rd child. DS (3) is 3yo.

Interesting vote so far! I completely agree but people get very defensive when the D issue is brought up.

Just use a different forum that you do like.

The only time it bothers me is when there's a dp , bf , gp , dsd and a dd all in one post. It can get confusing! Better than person a , b and c though.

I think it's fine because it denotes a family/loved one abbreviation, as opposed to random initial. "H" could be an initial for someone called Harry, could be Husband, could be horse, etc., but the "D" indicates "dear" as in, twee indicator that it's someone who would be classed as a close person in your life, whether they're considered "dear" or not!

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Yeah I agree. It's cringey.

There was a post once where someone was taking her GP to the GP - I stopped reading after the first sentence, it was far too early.

I agree that it allows posters to be passive aggressive by leaving out the ‘D’ and you can measure how pissed off they are by whether they include it or not.

Tbh it wouldn’t bother me whether it gets dropped or not but it’s up to individuals to do.

It would feel odd though.

If I just put P I’d feel like some posters wouldn’t know what I meant.

It’s a fun quirk, love it.