To not rehome my pets despite lowering their quality of life?

[bakingtouch]

I need this thread as a very clear wake up call if that's what's needed.

I've just broken up with my long term partner and have moved out of the house we were renting. I've recently moved into a ground floor flat that has accepted my pets. It has a garden bit out the front albeit concrete but my dog has no issue toileting there (obvs I clean)

They're all adjusting well (2 cats and a dog) and they're honestly my world, especially after the breakup, I'd feel so isolated without them. They're 7, 5 and 4. The dog is 4.

I'm having to go back to in office work full time (was at home 2/5 days before). On those 3 days my dog would get picked up by a service that offered a 2 hour play date service and dropped home again, with other dogs, but the best I can do now is have my mum pop in to let him out to the toilet. They've always been on KatKin and Butternut Box but this is massively going to have to change, my outgoings on my own are simply exceeding my salary so I'm having to cut back and they're going to need to go on a cheap food.

I do feel awful overall. They're life is going to be very different, but they're going to be happier with me still, right? or is it best to give them up to someone who can offer them a lot more?

Another vote for Borrowmydoggy. We met three people who were nice but not a perfect match then a totally lovely lady who works from home & loves the company of our dog, acts almost as an extra owner.

They'll be ok.

Can you take the dog for a long evening walk?

I had to go to work fulltime for a while while my dogs were young; not ideal but they napped a lot.

Can you get a cheap webcam so you can check on them via a phone app? Might ease your mind.

I was one of the posters that said that as I always view cats as much more independent. I have never owned one (or had one own me!), but any I have known, if they have access to outdoors they are out so much they are at getting stimulation. Although they might wander and find themselves a new owner if there needs are not met!

They would not be imprisoned in solitary confinement like a dog would be.

I wouldn't worry about the Butternut Box either. I mean, it's great but in part it's for the owner as you feel good about feeding meals you recognise as delicious rather than 'dog food' which may actually be just as nutritious.

But the cats are being locked in with each other and a dog when the owner is not at home so they cannot come and go as they please, nor escape each other or a dog if they want/need to. A one bed flat is generally pretty small also. If they are used to coming and going whenever, this change may lead to increased stress.

THIS
Just because a dog is not tearing the house apart doesn’t mean it isn’t being harmed by such lengthy periods of being left.

Part of loving our pets is ensuring they get all their needs met not just food and water that includes stimulation and emotional care.

On the days I work away from
home I ensure my dog is taken out for a minimum of two hours in total (usually as two separate visits) and if I couldn’t afford this I would either change job, find another dog care solution or rehome. I genuinely would because I care about my dog more than how much I love him.

We have also personally had two rescues who came to us precisely because their existing family couldn’t be with them in the day

i also gave up butternut box when my marriage ended but I kept the dogs and 3 years on my life is different again. Your situation now could be temporary, you could get another job wfh, you could find a new partner, move, get a lodger, you’ve no idea.
keep them, do your best.
maybe ask in local groups if you can share dog walks with someone? There might be someone who does shifts that would help you out and vice versa?

Well the food is a complete waste of money any way.

I think you are doing great! Dont rehome!🤗

I'm not familiar with cats though but i guess what some were saying about the cat flap might be a good idea.

P.S Just this morning i was reading on one of those dog support groups someone saying they leave their dog in the crate for 6 hours during the day and some people dare to say it was acceptable 😑

Not saying its ideal but long days alone are pretty standard for dogs in many countries. At least your mum is going to take your dog out for toilet and a bit of company.

Personally I'd go along with it, and see how the dog reacts but I have a feeling he'll be fine as long as he's with you and the cats. And I think you need your pets as much as they need you now.

Take care and good luck with your new life x

Oh and just adding: I had great experiences with borrowmydoggy, and even made a friend. Never had any issue with it, and my old dog had a lot of different borrowers, all absolutely lovely people.
Definitely worth a try!

Oh my heart ♥️
So so lovely to read that, well done for turning your life around!

The food as everyone has said, is not an issue at all. I had to reappraise why we were eating Aldi and Lidl but pets were getting top notch nosh. Now they eat grain free generic supermarket stuff but it's still good quality.

It will be tough going getting up early every single weekday to walk your dog before work. Then when you get home, another long walk without fail. I've never used BorrowmyDoggy but it sounds like it will suit your situation. I think I would cut out other expenses even to afford 1-2'days of daycare or a walker to break up the week.

There are other things you can do for your dog too - BBC Radio 2 on low for company, make puzzle bundles out of cardboard/ treats / sellotape for your dog to have fun ripping apart, filled frozen giant Kong's for breakfast as you leave the dog so she'll spend an hour or two licking that, all these things will help the dog pass the time without fretting.

The cats will miss you but they have each other to interact with, so it's not quite as bad.
Hope things work out ok for you.

We always leave BBC6 Music on for our cat (who even if we’re at home will often snooze in another room during the day - she’s only an evening lapcat) because she’s an indie kit.

Sign up to BorrowMyDoggy and see if anyone local would like to have them whilst they work from home

What area are you in roughly op

Can you post on your local Fb town group asking if anyone would like to walk your dog once a day or have a cuppa
Ans cuddle with a neighbour

I would try borrow my doggy, my mum is on it after her dog died and she couldn't afford a new one.

She works from home and has a lovely dog from not far away that comes round a few times a week while the owner is at work. Both her and the dog love it!

We are at home all day and our dogs spend a lot of time sleep now they're not puppies. Keep them!

They "sleep" during the day when they need a rest from stimulation or they are bored stiff and there is nothing else to do but wait for hours on end for something to happen. OPs dog, at home alone all day, day after day, they are not being stimulated at all so it means it is the latter.

So while it is not any bother for your neighbours, your soft furnishings, or even their owner it doesn't mean it is nice, or even a barely adequate life for a young dog.