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Original poster

To be very disappointed in teen

109 replies

SoccerMum1 · 15/07/2023 22:17

Am I being reasonable here to be very disappointed in DS14 today, here's the back story

DS14 asked me this morning to fill his water bottle up, and put it into his kit bag for him, as he was off out to play football at a mates house. On opening his bag, I saw a load of fruit which he'd purchased.

I asked him where he'd got it all from, and what he was planning to do with it - he said they were gonna use it to play football with, and to hang in the nets and take shots / aim at, and practise kickups with - DS played this once before at the beginning of the year, and asked to play it again a few months ago which I told him off for, and told him to find another activity.

He said he'd purchased all the fruit yesterday (spend £20 on it) after school, and didn't tell me cause he knew i'd stop him from doing it again, he said it was his time and money, and he could do what he wanted, and that he enjoyed doing it (and I was being a kill joy) and then stormed off, taking his bag with him

Am I being reasonable for being overly disappointed in ds here?

OP posts:
WeetabixTowels · 15/07/2023 22:40

Whilst I appreciate that some teenagers are total fucking nightmares and get girls pregnant/take drugs/commit crimes, I don’t think that means parents can’t be mad about anything ‘lesser’

SallyWD · 15/07/2023 22:42

I thought you were going to say he'd got someone pregnant, or was skiving off school or taking drugs! I mean his plan is ridiculous but it could be sooo much worse. Let them get on with it.

Mangotango39 · 15/07/2023 22:46

Well you could say computer games are a waste of money, they don't even physically exist.

in my eyes, he's spent the money on a game. Sounds silly and harmless in the grand scheme of things.

Whoiscomingtosaveyou · 15/07/2023 22:46

It’s a poor choice of what to spend money on but in terms of being “very disappointed” with a teen it wouldn’t be on the radar.

DaisyUpsy · 15/07/2023 22:47

I have de ja vu. Have you posted this before?

dancinfeet · 15/07/2023 22:49

did you post this a few months ago?

TappingTed · 15/07/2023 22:50

Waste? What about people who do cake smashes for baby’s birthdays? That’s a huge waste? And by people who know better than teenagers about the value of things…
Maybe suggest he and his friends ask
around for old fruit @SoccerMum1 as lots of people have old fruit at the bottom of their fridges… could help clear them out and save £20… but I just couldn’t get angry at football playing kids mucking around with fruit… it’s so wholesome really.

Original poster
SoccerMum1 · 15/07/2023 22:50

dancinfeet · 15/07/2023 22:49

did you post this a few months ago?

yep, I was unsure on whether to let him play the first time he asked, and the forum advised not to, so I told him to find another hobby - very disappointed he's done it again whilst keeping it hidden

OP posts:
Vintagecreamandcottagepie · 15/07/2023 22:51

Is this a joke?

Of all the things to get worked up about 🙄

saltinesandcoffeecups · 15/07/2023 22:53

🙄 oh good lord. Exactly what is your objection to to this?

Damnedidont · 15/07/2023 22:56

Lemonyyy · 15/07/2023 22:27

I can’t believe everyone has come on and literally just said “could be worse”. Yes I’d be upset with my kids wasting £20 of fruit, no matter who bought it, we waste so much food in this country it’s disgusting! I do expect my dc to be aware of what’s going on in the world around them.

I agree. Watching a group of entitled brats wasting £20 of food when you are struggling to put meals on the table must be deeply depressing.

DrCoconut · 15/07/2023 22:56

Having known real poverty I'd be upset about the waste of food and money when people are going hungry. I also hate cake smashes, "sensory play" with food and similar for the same reason.

MmmALovelyBitOfSquirrel · 15/07/2023 23:00

I'd be pissed off ONLY at the money he's spent. But, he'll see soon enough that all the money he's spent on that... Actually, I'm changing opinion as I write. Yes, it's a 'waste', but equally, if he spent it on a takeaway, it's still gone. If he spent it on trainers, it's still gone. He's having a laugh with his mates. Bit scruffy I guess but, he's having fun. He's making memories that they'll like talking about in a few years. I know one of my teens are very lax about money, it burns a hole in his pocket. But he sees his brother being able to buy things months after his birthday has been while he has nothing. Let him have his fun. They're only young once, wheres the harm. 'It'll attract rodents?' Well, likely the birds will get there first but if not, pass any field/park where kids go and there's often crisps, chips etc, on the floor somewhere.

xPissflapsx · 15/07/2023 23:01

I don't believe him. Something just doesn't add up.
Why would anyone spend money on kicking fruit?
Why not just kick a ball?
You sure it's not for target practice (BB gun, etc)

IVFlife · 15/07/2023 23:04

I'd likely be baffled but turn a blind eye

sadlittlelifejane · 15/07/2023 23:08

Damnedidont · 15/07/2023 22:56

I agree. Watching a group of entitled brats wasting £20 of food when you are struggling to put meals on the table must be deeply depressing.

Show quote history

Why? Him kicking fruit around doesn't take away from someone struggling to pay for food. There isn't a shortage of fruit for fuck sake. There's loads going brown in the park down the road. Presumably you don't have a car? Because surely you wouldn't be such an entitled brat to drive your car around in front of people who can't afford one?

FFSwhatisthis · 15/07/2023 23:08

@SoccerMum1

I'd be disappointed in him too.

It's a horrible waste of food & a dreadful state of mind that they can't understand there are (local) people hungry & unable to feed their kids.

yes there's drugs, alcohol, early parent hood, violence & a lot of other things they could be doing but a) fruit football doesn't mean they're not doing those things too and b) doesn't mean fruit football isn't a needless waste of food.

orangeleavesinautumn · 15/07/2023 23:08

harmless fun, and no more wasteful than people buying pumpkins to carve.

just tell him to buy his fruit "reduced to clear"

FFSwhatisthis · 15/07/2023 23:09

xPissflapsx · 15/07/2023 23:01

I don't believe him. Something just doesn't add up.
Why would anyone spend money on kicking fruit?
Why not just kick a ball?
You sure it's not for target practice (BB gun, etc)

@xPissflapsx

unfortunately it is 'a thing'

BillyNoM8s · 15/07/2023 23:12

Have you posted about this before? I remember exactly the same fruit football dilemma some months ago.

It's a slightly odd past time and a waste of £20 and food, but I'd pick my battles I think.

UrsulaIsMyQueen · 15/07/2023 23:12

I mean, it’s a really weird hobby to have and id find the food waste upsetting, but it’s his money and his life so I’m not sure what you can do really? I’d certainly tell my child that I thought it was wasteful and stupid, but I’m not sure it would change anything.

BillyNoM8s · 15/07/2023 23:16

Not really sure why people are dragging the cost of living and food banks into the mix? Unless her son has nicked his fruit from a food bank, it's a moot point that he's wasting it.

Zanatdy · 15/07/2023 23:20

Damnedidont · 15/07/2023 22:56

I agree. Watching a group of entitled brats wasting £20 of food when you are struggling to put meals on the table must be deeply depressing.

Show quote history

Agreed. Yes he could be mugging old ladies instead of shagging down the alleyway. Doesn’t mean it’s ok to do this. I’d be pretty annoyed too

Zanatdy · 15/07/2023 23:22

BillyNoM8s · 15/07/2023 23:16

Not really sure why people are dragging the cost of living and food banks into the mix? Unless her son has nicked his fruit from a food bank, it's a moot point that he's wasting it.

It’s really not. When there’s people who can’t afford to eat right now with high cost of mortgages and energy bills, watching a bunch of entitled teens kicking ten bells out of a loads of food is really shit. Of course COL crisis is relevant

TeleTropes · 15/07/2023 23:28

It’s not food waste. It’s used, just not eaten.

Much better to use natural, biodegradable items for fun than create more plastic tat that will outlast our grandchildren. I bet most PPs don’t give a second thought to the vast amounts of plastic waste they generate daily but are concerned about a small amount of food “waste”.

Nothing is harmless in capitalism.

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