Teacher gifts - ungrateful shit!

[Hufflemuff]

More of a rant than a question to be fair!

I was listening to Heart radio this morning and they had a teacher on called "Mc Grammer" (a rapping teacher - cringe) who was discussing teacher gifts and "what not to buy"...

He said one of the worse gifts he ever got from a student was a Rock - because the pupil said "he rocked" (aww) and some Doritos because that was the pupils favourite crisps (bless). He also said mugs were mostly an unwanted present "there's only so many cups of tea you can drink" apparently.

He said in the past he's gotten an Arsenal shirt, Nando's gift sets and gift cards... He said you should get to know the teacher to find out what they like and buy them something personal to them.

AIBU to be totally pissed off by this mans arrogance. It was totally tone deaf during the middle of a cost of living crisis to suggest parents buy gift cards (the minimum of which is usually £10) and other expensive presents in order for it to be considered a worthwhile gift. The fact he poo-pooed that boys rock as "one of the worse" gifts, which admittedly you wouldn't put on your mantel piece but the sentiment was there. He didn't consider that the boys parents might not have the money to buy a 'real' gift but he still wanted to give him something.

Ah!!! I was so very cross. It was the expectation to get something as a certainty and even then, he might not have been satisfied with it.

I have teachers in the family and they are always happy to get anything at all, no matter what it is. I think he was a really bad representation of all those caring teachers and Heart did the profession a real disservice by having him on.

Rant over! Gah!

My mum always bought something for our primary teachers at Christmas and the end of the year, and I vividly remember the teachers in those days (1980s, northern town) having a desk piled up with small gifts on the last day of term. As today, they were mostly chocs/wine/candles/bath salts/mugs etc! I don’t think things have changed that much!

(Only primary - not really secondary teachers though, I remember.)

I normally do either some Prosecco or some kind of small growing plant in a nice pot. Hopefully then the teacher can always regift, or put it in the classroom if they don’t drink/don’t want it at home.

DD’s had a really lovely teacher this year (who is quite young), so she’s also making her a bracelet as well.

I teach secondary but have always been so delighted by any very occasional present from a student - I’ve had a couple of lovely plants and things. One of my sixth formers bought me a really pretty dish that’s on my bedside cabinet now. Another got me a box of chocolates and a little impulse gift set - not my thing but it was a really lovely thought. About ten years ago a student painted me a lovely picture linked to my subject as a leaving gift and I still treasure it. I’d have appreciated a rock!

For my kids teachers and TAs I always go for a big tub of biscuits at Christmas and a small box of fancy chocolates each and a card at the end of the year.

Agree with you OP. My mam was a teacher for nearly 40 years and got all sorts. A little girl got her a plant 20 years ago and it's still on my mams kitchen windowsill. That little girl will be hitting 30 now. I'm sure if she'd been given a rock it would be there too. He's in the wrong job.

To be honest I don't think teachers should expect gifts - they may work hard but it is their job! I try and buy people gifts wgo are volunteers - Brownie and Guide Leaders, the Chair of the PTA - people who are not paid for what they do but work incredibly hard - some have made more differece for my children than people who are paid

I remember buying a bar of butterscotch with my own money - pennies scraped together - we didn’t have a lot of money at home, wrapping it, and giving it to my teacher at Christmas. It was an meagre gift and inexpensive- probably the equivalent of a pound or two today and I was quite embarrassed but I wanted to buy her a present. The teacher unwrapped it, proclaimed it a wonderful gift, opened the bar and enthusiastically ate some.

Forty years later I can still remember how proud and happy I was that she liked it. The saying ‘people might not remember what you did or said, but they will always remember how you made them feel’ is often so true and it has influenced how I live my life.

Glad to read about the hand made cards as my daughter has done that for her teacher and TA, sequins, glitter, gems, the lot 😀
I've also bought them nice chocolates (i know they like them) as they have been superstars this year and really sad to leaving them (me and my daughter!)

As this thread shows, the vast majority of teachers don’t expect gifts.

Teachers very rarely received gifts when I was at school. In fact I don't remember anyone ever bringing in a gift - and doing so had never occurred to me or my parents.

Both of my children also successfully navigated their way through the education system from age 4 to age 18 without ever having given any of their teachers a gift or card.

Why do people feel the need to give gifts nowadays? I assume it must be the parents who buy them and not the children.

If you absolutely must get a gift, be sure to make it something consumable and not a junk item like a mug or an ornament etc.

Imagine being a teacher and 10 kids in your class buy you a "world's best teacher" mug for Christmas, then another 10 get you a similar one at the end of the summer term, then it happens again the following year and the year after that and so on! What on earth are people supposed to do with all the junk/clutter?

He’s another one who shouldn’t teach! You have to wonder what life skills and morals he’s actually giving the poor kiddos he ‘teaches’.

We didn’t buy a single teacher present for any of our kids’ teachers but sometimes they would make them a little home made card and give that. The only time we bought a gift from our family was for the library of our son’s special school. He had been there from when it opened and it made a massive difference in our life and we wanted to give something as a thank you, and so we bought a fun set of books we knew the other younger children would enjoy

Gifts for teachers is so overhyped and is just an accepted thing to do, especially for certain parents who kind of do it for show and one-upmanship. I think schools should ban gifts for staff - cards or a heart felt poem if you feel like, but no gifts.

Im in my 20s but I only ever brought my form tutor a little something like a box of Chocolates. I do remember when I did my GCSEs I brought my form tutor and my english teacher a nice pot plant each (they were both female and in there late 50s/60s). My form tutor as a token gift and the english teacher as it was by far my worst subject and she had gone above and beyond and I came away with a very good grade so it was an appreciation gift for her extra help and support.

I’m a teacher and still have cards from my students from when I started.Love the ones that are written by the dc themselves and I also appreciate the ones that the parents write.
Chocolates are fab. Hand made buns etc go into the bin I’m afraid after getting a terrible gastro once. Knick knacks and mugs make my heart sink as I have to think of a way to dispose of them . I’m not ungrateful but I have no desire or interest in accumulating more tat.
Best thing ever is a gift card from a group of parents. Second best thing is nothing.

When my DH was a deputy head he had a form where he met his form twice a day for the whole five years

They got him one of those giant (hideous) padded cards and every one of them had written a really lovely personal paragraph about him - he literally cried, they cried, and there was a giant group hug 🤗

He said it was his best moment in 20 years of teaching

Honestly I reckon he will want me to put that card in his coffin - we've moved half a dozen times since, card still in his study

He is a complete arse. Anything at all - esp homemade cards- were always appreciated by me and my teaching colleagues. I walkways shared any choices or sweets I was given with the class (I suppose you can't do that any longer, sadly) and choccie biccies went down a treat when left for all staff to share in the staffrroom. "Teacher" mugs never go amiss: we used to ut them in the staffroom for staff and visitors to use. I was totally embarrassed by being given money in the form of vouchers (and actually, I don't think teachers are allowed to accept these any longer in some LEAs)or wine (! much as I needed it by the end of them!).

This. They must agave searched high and low to find someone like that.... interesting considering potential motivation in the context around teacher strikes- surely not deliberately stirring up ill feeling?!

again.. my grand-father did receive gifts when he was a teacher. It's not about "nowadays".

I'm a (secondary school) teacher and hate getting "tat" or trinkets or dust gathering stuff. Sorry!

If you're going to buy a gift, get something useful for a classroom that kids can use, a voucher, or something edible or drinkable. Wine! Mmmmm, wine!

What I really like are all the cards and letters I've received thanking me for the effort I've put into teaching. I've kept every one of them. Some have even made me cry. Some have really surprised me e.g. quiet kids that rarely spoke in my lesson but took the time to write a little card saying how much they loved my lessons and enthusiasm and how I made the subject enjoyable.

Some gifts are nice but a card is the best.

Teacher's gifts are really unnessary en bloc which they seem to be. I hope that stupid man's comments go far and wide and have the desired affect that this mawkish gift-to-landfill, comes to an end.

It's actually disgusting given that so many people are struggling and this twat mouths off about 'thoughtless' gifts.

As a teacher I do not expect to receive gifts at all, please don't feel pressured to do so. A card with a message or a simple thank you is the best gift anyway.

I was a secondary teacher and we never expected - nor usually got - gifts. I once got a chocolate orange from a boy when I had a Y7 form for my tutor group and it was clear his Mum had said "Give this to your tutor! Go on, don't come back and tell me you didn't!" because the way he sidled up to the front, trying to do it without the rest of the (all boys) class seeing, was superb, bless him!

I also got a lovely gift from one of my A level students after he got an A grade (no A* grades in those days) and I still have it - it was 1987!

I offered to organise the teachers gift this year. I really like this particular teacher and so do many parents.

So I have my bank details and received amounts from £20 to £5 to nothing. I made it clear no minimum or maximum and no obligation. I'm not sitting there keeping track of 30 parents contributions. One reminder and that was it.

Vouchers purchased for teacher and TAs. Got my child to write card from the class. Job done.

When I was at school (80's/90's) we did not get the teacher gifts. Does anyone know why we do now? I have never really understood the trend if I am honest (will probably get shot down for saying).

This. I imagine teachers get so much tat.

If some kid brought me a rock I'd be over the moon! A gift is a gift, not something the recipient gets to choose!
Many years ago when I was at school we didn't get gifts for teachers, they were lucky if they got a bunch of roses from my dad's garden!

When my kids were at primary school, in the 70's, no one ever bought the teachers a present.

A card, for any that were really liked, was it.🙂

There was the "competitive" Mum who always liked to be seen walking in with a massive gift, giggling and flicking her hair. The year she walked in with a 24 pack of cans of stella (this was her go to for male teachers) to give to the openly Muslim teacher was quite the moment.