Falling out over concert logistics

[RightWhereTheSpiritMeetsTheBones]

My childhood best friend moved across the world 3 years ago. Found out that there’d be a concert held where she is, and managed to snag 4 tickets for it. One for me, one for her, and another 2 for a friend and her boyfriend who wanted to get tickets too.

The vague plan was always for me to stay with my friend at her studio apartment and for the other friend and her boyfriend to get a hotel. We got tickets together but we’re not necessarily going together IYSWIM.

After seeing hotel prices though friend thinks they should stay with us!! Obviously that’s not going to happen especially since friend will not want strangers living in her apartment for a week and I’m not going to put her in the difficult position of being the ‘bad guy’.

Actually not even that chuffed to hand tickets over—they haven’t even paid—to friend and the boyfriend after how rude they’ve been about the whole thing but have accepted that I did promise them I’d get tickets for them.

AIBU to not be more accommodating to friend and boyfriend?

Yes, but why should they? They haven't been prompt with payment and they're being a pain. OP did the work to buy them (not an easy feat these days).

If they back out I'll take the extra 2 tickets off your hands. I live in Australia and wasn't able to get tickets and my DD would be over the moon to go!

My point is - if she does accept payment and pass them over, she can’t stop them doing a thing with them

I thought everyone on the group was trying to get tickets but the op got lucky ie she sent the only one who put in the “hard work”

Send a single 'Hi' text, wait for them to say 'hi' back, THEN send the text about the tix.
This way it's in a chat, and it's more difficult to say they didn't receive the text from you...

If they don’t take them then please don’t sell them on for profit. Let them go for face value and fees. There are fan to fan exchanges and ethical resale platforms or even the option to return tickets so they can be refunded and go to people on waitlists.

Concerts are expensive enough without profiteering - you might have been/be the person who missed out.

That’s a bit weird! 😂

It's not that much of a risk buying the tickets. They can easily be resold. There's already two sets of people on here who would buy them.
I hadn't thought about the couple buying and reselling them at a profit. That would stick in my craw tbh. If they don't buy them if it were me I'd sell them at cost price to someone as that's what you had planned to do originally. Doesn't seem right to profiteer from it.

This is such a none problem.

They need to pay for the tickets they had you buy and then sort themselves out.

"we should all stay together to split the cost"
"no sorry friend that doesn't work for me as I have accommodation with a friend I'm traveling to see"
"but then we can't afford to go"
" should have thought about that then shouldn't you, would you rather I sell your tickets on?"

End of discussion.

It was essentially a lottery system in most cases to even buy tickets. You can’t buy them without an access code if you didn’t qualify for pre sales, and if you do actually get to the purchase screen, you click on whatever you can get and then x4 before the site decides to kick you out to the back of the line. The chance of getting there is slight so didn’t ask for prepayment cause I didn’t even think I’d get tickets and then once I got to the screen there was no time to text bank details and wait for them to send it.

Of course there’s resale but (speaking for myself and I’m sure some other people) it’s nice to just get the tickets first and not have to worry if you won’t get any for a ‘normal’ price.

The Australia thing for me was a bonus as I was going to visit my friend anyway but lots were trying for Australia/Singapore first because if they got neither they could try again for the European dates whereas if you tried only for the UK one you’re stuck with the resale market if you didn’t get an access code.

Presumably everyone on the group was endeavouring to get tickets? Or only you?

Don’t worry I hate the resale-profiteering market and think they’re ruining the concert experience for everyone else so won’t participate in it myself!

Was a new group chat specifically to help each other buy tickets since the max was 4 tickets and if you were only buying 2 why not help someone else get 2 if you’ve got the access code or access to presale?

So what you going to do op

drama vs pp sensible suggestion

Hi OP

You should have put in your OP about the fact you said to your friend before you bought they tickets that you were staying at your other friends and they would have to find alternative accommodation. That changes things and shows you were explicitly clear it was a separate trip but they said to get tickets and now they're trying to get you to change things for them.

On this basis you're not being unreasonable and I'd just say to them 'no worries if you don't want to go any more, I'll be able to sell them no problem' and leave it at that

*Anyway, sent details of my bank account and the price (with receipt!) for the tickets yesterday afternoon. Was blue ticked almost instantly but still no reply with my money no where to be seen…

Told them they’d have till Tuesday.*

I get that the assumption they could stay with your friend or that you would pay stay in a hotel with them was silly, but what did she actually say that was rude?

Very reasonable. Gives them weekend to do research. And then if not possible either offer them back to you or buy and then resell

Why so snarky when OP had said 45 minutes before you'd posted what she was going to do? Not quite sure what the "big drama" would be anyway, the aibu was should she be helping these people more to sort accommodation, not whether she should have a fight in the car park about it.

"I'm happy to play 'Ticketmaster' for you but I draw the line at playing 'Thomas Cook'."

That's such a good line ! may ramp things up rather than calm then down sadly.

They will just have to stay in an expensive hotel for the concert and move to a cheaper one a bit further out for the rest of the holiday. I feel for them a bit - I'm going to see HSLOT in Italy next Sunday and between me deciding to go and actually buying tickets the hotel prices had quadrupled. I had expected an increase but not that much. It was the same in Cardiff. Luckily it's only one night. Hoping I get London TS tickets to avoid travelling.

Anyway it's not your problem to sort and you were really kind to get them the tickets in the first place.

“Falling out” indicates drama to me 🤷‍♀️

What's she supposed to do though? She held up her end of the agreement - 'drama' is inevitable if you are unfortunate enough to encounter a CF. OP hadn't been paid yet for the tickets she bought at their request. It's definitely not on her to sort out their accommodation or even to spell it out that she won't be arranging that for them - she isn't their mum!

What I would have done?

”shame about the hotel prices! No chance staying with my friend though but don’t stress because all being well you will find somewhere and, if not and you don’t want the tickets - let me know and I’ll see on (face value!). Good luck!”