Falling out over concert logistics

[RightWhereTheSpiritMeetsTheBones]

My childhood best friend moved across the world 3 years ago. Found out that there’d be a concert held where she is, and managed to snag 4 tickets for it. One for me, one for her, and another 2 for a friend and her boyfriend who wanted to get tickets too.

The vague plan was always for me to stay with my friend at her studio apartment and for the other friend and her boyfriend to get a hotel. We got tickets together but we’re not necessarily going together IYSWIM.

After seeing hotel prices though friend thinks they should stay with us!! Obviously that’s not going to happen especially since friend will not want strangers living in her apartment for a week and I’m not going to put her in the difficult position of being the ‘bad guy’.

Actually not even that chuffed to hand tickets over—they haven’t even paid—to friend and the boyfriend after how rude they’ve been about the whole thing but have accepted that I did promise them I’d get tickets for them.

AIBU to not be more accommodating to friend and boyfriend?

people are being stupid. it was clearly tickets to Taylor Swift (congrats by the way!) and people would have paired up with strangers on the street to get in the virtual queue to get tickets.

to Australia? From the UK. Well surely a pretty niche group with a shed load of money to spare.

OP have you checked out flight costs yet 😬

Messages to send. Do NOT send tix without payment.
Hi x , are you two going to pay me for the tickets? Will send when you do. If not please let me know as I will obviously resell them.

x: oh I thought we’d sort accom first?
you: I don’t need accomm, that’s all up to you. This isn’t news- I told you that before getting the tix! Does that mean you don’t want them anymore?
x:splutter some of us are doing it hard
you: well yes some are, but nobody planning to cross the world to go to a concert can really complain. If you don’t want them I’ll resell next week.

you: reminder- hi, could you pay for the TS tix this week pls?

You: hi, I’ve sold them on now.

As I said before purchasing the tickets, I’m visiting my friend. This was never intended this as a joint trip with you and your bf. Let me know if you want the tickets by x date otherwise I’ll sell them.

Sound like they haven't said they don't actually want the tickets, you just don't want to give them to them as they were rude. Just text you have made accommodation arrangements so they need to make their own. Give your bank details for the tickets incase they still want them as its a bit shitty to back out of that when you've promised it. Give them a deadline to pay of no more than one week or you will resell, obviously resale won't be an issue for TS. Don't even discuss flights with them, Book yours now so it's obvious you aren't going together.

Apart from saying no to your friend and their boyfriend about the accommodation and getting them to pay for tickets pronto the only other helpful thing you could do is to ask your friend with whom you are staying if she knows of anyone nearby who would like to offer and be paid to have the other two as accommodation is skyrocketing out of their reach.

She might know some one who would like to rent out their spare bedroom at reasonable rates for a week.

If they can’t afford a hotel, or apartment, they’ll have to look into hostels. If they can’t afford that, they can’t go and you’ll have two extra tickets to sell.

As pps have said. Tell them you can’t help as you have accommodation. Ask for ticket money or sell them on. They are being supremely cheeky. This is not your problem and you need to be firm I think.
Then look forward to Taylor and seeing your friend.

If they can’t afford the hotel, what on Earth do they think they’re going to do about flights?! They’ll be looking at at least £1k return each for Australia!

Do not give them their tickets unless they pay you. Give them a deadline and say you can resell them if everything is too expensive for them. Don’t budge! You’ve done them a favour and they’re being arses!!

Missing the point of the thread.... (Yes they're cf and the op needs a spine)

Flying all the way to Oz for a concert, only a few tonnes of CO2 then🤔

This.

Excellent clear message.

Just because you obliged by buying tickets through easy accesss, does NOT mean you are now obligated to attend together.

Their accommodation woes are nothing to do with you.

They are CF's.

i could well imagine any apartment being 50/50.

Get that payment before you transfer the tickets and don't discuss your trip further with them.

I wouldn’t inflict these two CFs on anyone, let alone a friend’s friend.

think they jumped in without considering the true cost of a trip to Australia.

I think this is it essentially. It was all a fantasy thing since we thought we wouldn’t get tickets until we actually did.

Anyway, sent details of my bank account and the price (with receipt!) for the tickets yesterday afternoon. Was blue ticked almost instantly but still no reply with my money no where to be seen…

Told them they’d have till Tuesday.

You won’t have any issues selling the tickets on. I’d just message them along the lines of this:

If I had known there’d be all this drama I’d have just bought 2 tickets and not bothered to ask around if you’d like me to help you buy 2 if I got ‘in’. I did tell you my plans beforehand - I’d never thought of this as a group trip, I was always just going to see my friend. If you don’t want the tickets any more then let me know and I’ll sell them on.

So basically your friend thinks that if you buy Taylor Swift tickets in Australia, they come with free accommodation. 😅 Shes a cheeky fucker.

Excellent OP. No matter what happens to FOMO CFs have a great time - a trip to Oz to catch up with a best friend AND going to see TS together on her biggest tour - stuff of dreams!

Are these colleagues?

How close are you? Socialise?

How old are you all?

Presumably a very well paid and pretty responsibility free group of “friends”?

Not colleagues. It all came out of a big group chat where people invited whoever was interested that we vaguely know that wants to go to the concert. With this couple, I was classmates with the woman maybe 15 years ago and I still see her from time to time at the cafe in town. We say hi how are you etc but that’s about it. Have no clue who the boyfriend is and have never spoken to him ever.

But you must have all had such trust in one another. Given you were each prepared to pay a huge amount for each other upfront.

and booking tix for something on the other side of the world for people that I’m pretty much on acquaintance level to - baffling!

Presumably all very comfortably off, flexible and pretty responsibility free?

this trip is going to cost many many thousands of pounds. How long are you planning on being out there?

So she’s an ex classmate, who thinks your friend should be putting them up. What a cf!

Just a piece of advice OP. Do not let them have the tickets to sell on, they'll make a huge profit. Either they will use them or you'll be selling them for your own profit, make that very clear. In fact it would be a bonus if they don't go, with the resale price you'd cover a big chunk of your flights.

PP suggested a really sensible and drama free way of approaching this

are you going to do that?

Or go for the big drama have it out with her approach?

An ex classmate you hardly know

and yet you were happy to pay upfront for her and her partner for a very expensive ticket across the other side of the world?

If they pay for them and the Op then passes the tickets to them, they can do whatever they heck they like with the tickets surely