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Original poster

Are people with more children happier?

121 replies

DinkeyDonkey · 02/07/2023 13:18

I have one child, who brings so much joy to our lives. So much so, I don't feel I need another. But I wonder, does having more children bring more joy? It must do.

OP posts:
FourTeaFallOut · 02/07/2023 13:20

Erm, I suspect everyone has their own tipping point. For me, happiest was with three dc but by four I might collapsed under the weight of endless laundry and given up the will.

SuffolkUnicorn · 02/07/2023 13:21

Depends on the parenting

User63847484848 · 02/07/2023 13:22

Depends on the children I think and also how could you ever know, so many factors involved.
personally for me no, 3dc and they all bring additional worry along with joy of course

Someoneonlyyouknow · 02/07/2023 13:22

I have three children who bring me great joy (most of the time) but I think more children would stretch me too far. So do what works for you. It's odd but we never suggest to happily married people that they should try polygamy

pinguins · 02/07/2023 13:22

Mine each bring me joy in different ways. Our life was lacking in some dimensions without each of them. But I don't think I would have been able to put my finger on that if I hadn't had them.

TedMullins · 02/07/2023 13:23

Surely that depends entirely on the person, their wants, their circumstances and the children?

MaxwellCat · 02/07/2023 13:24

No i have 4 children and im extremely miserable and depressed

EmmaR0305 · 02/07/2023 13:24

TedMullins · 02/07/2023 13:23

Surely that depends entirely on the person, their wants, their circumstances and the children?

Agree with this. It’s not a one size fits all - like asking someone how long a piece of string is.

Sometimeswinning · 02/07/2023 13:24

I knew from my first baby I wanted more. It would have been a tough few years if I'd not been able to go on and have more. Three was definitely when I thought I'm done.

I don't quite understand what you are asking? Are you regretting only having one child?

PurpleBananaSmoothie · 02/07/2023 13:25

More children bring more logistics, more money, more noise, less opportunity to have time by yourself. For many people the joys outweigh those stresses but everyone has a tipping point when the stress of children is too much. For some people that is no children, for some people that wouldn’t be until 7 children.

ShirleyPhallus · 02/07/2023 13:25

Who can define or quantify happiness from external factors?

I was very very happy when childfree. Huge joy in having my own time, own life, no expectations or pressures on me. I am also happy having children, but it’s a different happiness.

I actually think you have to be happy in yourself rather than relying on other things / people to make you happy

Busywithsomething · 02/07/2023 13:26

I think it depends on the ages of everyone. Plus the health of all.

cinnamonfrenchtoast · 02/07/2023 13:27

There are so many variables to consider.

Ages, personalities, any disabilities or health conditions, financial security, living conditions...

Personally I can't think of anything worse than a house full of kids but some people would say the same about having no children or an only child. Luckily we're all different!

Wallywobbles · 02/07/2023 13:27

We have 4 teens. They're nice kids. I will still be delighted to see the back of them. I've had enough of thinking of others and putting them first.

It turns out as they become adults it really feels like they take up too much space.

I liked having 4 smaller kids more. I liked it when they had a bit more enthusiasm and less disdain.

MyFaceIsAnAONB · 02/07/2023 13:28

FourTeaFallOut · 02/07/2023 13:20

Erm, I suspect everyone has their own tipping point. For me, happiest was with three dc but by four I might collapsed under the weight of endless laundry and given up the will.

This is us. 4 is a massive no. 2 was so simple and calm. 3 is just right!

But 3 also brings more issues and logistics.

I think you can be happy or sad either way depending. If you had a second ‘to give the first a sibling’ you might not enjoy it as much as someone who always wanted 2. If you wanted more kids than you could have then you might be sad for a time. If you went for a second and got triplets (happened to a friend!) then yes you might be more miserable for a bit than if you’d just had a second. But also you might not! Impossible to answer really!

Theomummy2 · 02/07/2023 13:29

Considering the happiest people on earth are those with 0 children, I’m not sure more children = happier

MaryJean87 · 02/07/2023 13:31

It depends. I've got 4, all have different qualities that I love and it makes me happy that I've created these humans. But the downside is that I don't have much time to do things for just me or my husband. I have high stress levels at times when they're squabbling with each other and the house is a tip half an hour after I've tidied up, so swings and roundabouts. But in general I'm happy I've got the family I always wanted.

edenhills · 02/07/2023 13:33

I have two kids and feel very happy. Most of my friends don't have any children and also appear to have happy lives.

Ragwort · 02/07/2023 13:34

Totally agree with Shirley - for me happiness comes from within myself rather than other people ... I have one DC, I am very, very happy with the conscious decision I/we made to have one DC ... I look at the struggles people with more than one DC face, whether or not they have the finances to make their lives 'easier' and all I see are the challenges and logistics ... and lack of time for themselves.

Surlaplage · 02/07/2023 13:53

My 3 kids bring the joy i felt with one multiplied by 3, and the answer is actually more than 1x3 because their interactions with eachother enhance the joy further. I really don't want any more but if I accidentally got pregnant, then there would be something joyous about that too (though I would be shattered!).

HollyBookBlue · 02/07/2023 13:57

I thought I wanted 3 kids. Had my DD and then couldn't imagine changing our family by adding to it. Perfectly happy with one

Nordicrain · 02/07/2023 14:00

As far as I recall studies show that parents become progressively less happy per child untill you are over 3 children.

Drews · 02/07/2023 14:03

Depends on the person. 1 is too many for me.

VisionsOfSplendour · 02/07/2023 14:04

Yes, every person with more than one child is happier than you 😀

Your premise is odd, why would the number of children by the only factor affecting happiness which obviously is impossible to quantify anyway

hattie43 · 02/07/2023 14:06

Not from reading MN no I wouldn't say so , nothing but stress and battling ND conditions .

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