AIBU to say private school children are much sportier & better musicians?

[Denimrevival]

Just on the back of comparing with friends & family with dc in private schools. The kids & their families are all naturally sporty & outdoorsy anyways but the school provides a vast range of sports with it's own pool & swim team.
Musically their kids all play 2 or three instruments all at least grade 4 or 5..
How do these private schools do the academics, music & sports to such a high standard? Do they also have a very good base if the kids are having sport & music reinforced outside school through their families lifestyles?

Dd did go to our local state for two years and it was awful. So I sadly have experience of that. I also coach kids in my spare time.

Not sure why everyone except private school parents are allowed to confidently assert what they think about kids and sport.

😳I'm embarrassed for you with those remarks, yes it is clearly the case that your hard working children are innately superior to the riff-raff at the local compo that you drive past in your Land Rover as you ferry your children to and from school; reminding your children that the reason these state educated children are heading for loserville is because they even complain about walking in the rain (oh hang on). Or do you remind your children that being collected by the school bus at 7am is testament to their commitment to their education and hard work as opposed to the riff-raff at the local comp who simply can't be bothered to turn up to school when it isn't open!

It is a good job that you are there to remind them that their struggles are real (heavy is the head that wears the crown of an expensive education) but that ultimately, one day, like you they to will have a misplaced sense of superiority.

Well that's fine then isn't it? Dd manages Saturday school, two school sports and riding but you have to be very committed to do that.

This post is about musical and sporty children though. Obviously not all children are sporty or musical - even with the opportunities, there are plenty of privately educated children who won’t be good at those things, but they’ve had the benefit of being exposed to the opportunities which then picks up those who have a natural talent.

I don’t think we are superior (we are both state educated), but we do what we think is best for our children. On the contrary, the parents who sneer at our choice to send our children to school on a Saturday are the ones with an air of superiority, telling us it’s mean parenting.

I can honestly say that the vast majority of children at our school are happy with Saturdays at school. For the minority who aren’t, perhaps it’s not the right school for them. I don’t know any child who is forced to learn an instrument if they really don’t want to either.

As I said, I’m betting it would change if the PM,s kids went to school where they couldn’t afford a glue stick.
Why don’t the state school parents push? Sometimes they are too busy keeping their own heads above water. As I said, it’s the difference between being able to take your child somewhere to take part in something, and having to take them to work every night while you clean because there’s no one else to look after them.

Babybythesea not all state school parents are too busy keeping their heads above water?
What about all the parents on these threads who say ‘we send our dc to state school because we are decent caring people - even though we could easily afford private school’?
Also, plenty of politicians’ children go to state school - why don’t they do something?
As a pp has said, it’s not easy for parents to make changes in their dcs’ schools. Thinking that private school parents are some sort of ubermensch capable of working miracles is pretty patronising to state school parents.

Quite. There are schools out there that don't have Saturday school, so pick one. Also noone is forced to learn an instrument. I'm sure there are non sporty girls at dds school, lots of the very musical ones are not sporty. They all seem very happy so I'm happy.

Why don’t the state school parents push? Sometimes they are too busy keeping their own heads above water. As I said, it’s the difference between being able to take your child somewhere to take part in something, and having to take them to work every night while you clean because there’s no one else to look after them

It's not a Netflix show. The vast majority of families at our local state school are perfectly regular 2 income families.

@Goldenbear no one has said that private school pupils are poor unfortunates or disadvantaged. In fact everyone has said the opposite. What they have said is that your assumption that they don’t experience ‘real life’ is wrong. You are wrong simple as that. You are changing peoples words to suit your own argument. If you honestly believe that the only way you can experience real life or be creative, is by fearing you might get stabbed on your way to the local comp then I feel very sorry for you. That is a very blinkered and sad view of the world.
I know a lot about this real life you talk about. More than you actually. It’s no more real life than going to a private school surrounded by countryside. What it is is shite and no one wants to live this life just so they can record a bit of grime and rap about disadvantage.
It is not a race to the bottom, no child should experience adversity in any form, children from every walk of life do unfortunately. Who are you to say that a child being abused but going to private schools experience is less real than one who goes to an inner city comp and uses a food bank. Both are real, both are unacceptable. No one on this planet is saying the private school child doesn’t have an advantage over the other but both are living in the real world.
I find it pretty ridiculous that you feel you are in a position to preach about kids in an inner city comp when you yourself are sat in your pretty comfortable life.

The posts from @Goldenbear about needing a shit school to influence the great art that is grime and drill (awful sexist terrible drivel) are absolutely cringe.

@Terryer I'm calling troll on that poster!! Some or the comments are bordering on deranged

JoWawa · Yesterday 11:53
Private school days tend to be longer.”

This. Lessons started at 8.40am and finished at 4.20. Clubs and music lessons continued until 5.30pm

This is the thing though- you have a bad experience of state school and that has given you a view of state schools. In reality there is massive variation from school to school. Some will (shock!) be better than private schools even.

Everyone can assert their opinions on children and sport but surely you recognise that yours is your own experience? My children have their own experiences - they are even different from each other's. 'Sport' is used as a catch-all term on the thread and while the OP was possibly thinking lacrosse, others will be thinking about how their child is at the football pitch every night. The term 'sporty' is interesting. My kids train most days for their particular sport but my son particularly would look alarmed if you called him sporty (he hates team sports and is one of the smallest in his class). 😄

At no point have I said that my children are superior. This post is about sporty and musical children. My point is that sporty and musical children have to work hard even if they’re given the extra opportunities at a private school. There are plenty of state school pupils who are sporty and musical as well, who work equally as hard (the county sports team I have experience of has a mixture of children, all of who get on and don’t care where each other goes to school). There are also plenty of children and parents, state or privately educated, who wouldn’t make the most of opportunities they’re given.

My children are aware of how fortunate they are to attend their school, through no reason other than having parents who can afford the fees. I went to a state school so can see both sides. I really don’t know why these threads have to be turned into a battle against the 2 sectors.

You are calling troll, funny that as I have been on MN forever. You constant assertion of the troll is because you don't have a counter argument and the fact it makes you feel uncomfortable as that is the decision you have made for your children. Stop pretending private school does not have a moral dimension to it. The misplaced sense of superiority being displayed by some posters is evidence of exactly why they chose private school for their children. If there is not a difference why bother at all?

This is the thing though- you have a bad experience of state school and that has given you a view of state schools. In reality there is massive variation from school to school. Some will (shock!) be better than private schools even

At sport? Unlikely. They might have a good football team. I'm sure there are some private schools that have shit extracurricular but I've no idea why people choose those.

When did I reference 'grime & drill' you are the only one who has used this as an example. Why is that because of your preconceptions on certain music being inferior to other genres. The snobbery is vulgar and many middleclass parents with children at state school don't want their children to be surrounded by parents and their offspring that share these values.

Of course there's a difference. I don't like the state schools near me so we picked a better one. If you love your state school then great. If you happen to have a state school in catchment that prioritises sport amd music while also getting excellent academic results then that's great for you. Morality didn't come into my choices, other than I think the lack of sport and music in the state system IS immoral and I'd be delighted to see this government gone and the fantastic turn around under Labour.

Based on one school, or two if you count the one you've attended, you know what all secondary schools are like for sports? I live in a town with 5 state secondary schools and there is massive variation between them for sports facilities, clubs available etc. My dd's and one of the others even has a pool, tennis courts, hockey pitches etc.
You think that football is the only sport on offer?? Really?? I think you've just illustrated that your perception is very different from reality.

I said if you have one you are lucky! Can't think of a single one like that in four counties near me. There's one 6th form college which has a pool and pitches.

Even if they could afford it. Lets face it bands where the members have gone to state school are all about cooler- all that detachment from poorer people doesn't do their empathy any good. I read an article where the private school was delivering lessons on empathy- hilarious, a bit like volunteering from private school to work with the poor 'unfortunates' - presumably to install in the rich kids how lucky they are!

No wonder some people think you are a troll with posts like this, tbf.

I haven’t read any posts here suggesting there isn’t a difference between state and private. There are loads of posts saying that private school children are often more sporty and musical purely because they have more opportunity and spend more time on sport on music. The posts are literally pointing out that the opportunity and time is the difference between state and private. No one is saying that makes their children superior.

I chose private school to give my children those extra opportunities, not because I think they’re superior to others.

Do I think that all state school pupils should have the same opportunities? Yes, obviously I do. Unfortunately though, we cannot afford to have Olympic size pools etc, and specialist sports and music teachers, at all state schools without huge tax rises.

Ha ha ha ha! I went to private school. I am tone deaf, I don't play any instruments, I have flat feet and the most sporty thing I do is walk my dog. I used to hide in the library to avoid PE!!

Then this thread doesn't really apply to you.

Have you visited all secondary schools across 4 counties?

Odd that here there are 2 secondary schools with pools as well as several primaries.