Chrissy Teigen surrogacy

[HermioneKipper]

Just announced a 4th baby via a surrogate.

Its just so breathtakingly entitled to buy a woman’s body - especially when you already have 3 children?!

No regard for the safety of the surrogate’s body or thought for the baby who would be ripped from their mother at birth.

These people sicken me

What do you mean lesser of 2 evils.

Do you mean because the local authority did such a crap job of raising a child in a care home that you deem that child incapable of ever being a good enough mother to allow them to raise a child on their own. Even if there is nothing to say that would happen

So you are all for ripping a baby away from its mother and taking that child into care for the process to be repeated

I was in care growing up and despite being the latter end of 30s and having a husband and a detached house in a leafy area on the edge of London I had SS at my bedside after I had given birth to both of my children.

I was old enough to know how to get them to back off, say what they wanted to hear. But it was only when I was talking to other mums that I realised that none of the other mums had this. After my 2nd I was ready for them when I saw them approach

Only other person I have ever spoken to who had the same had also spent time in the care system growing up.

Are you saying that as care home kids we should be sterilised to stop us getting pregnant and abusing our children
because we are guaranteed to be an abusive parent because we spent time in the care system.

Same. Babies shouldn't be bought and sold.

It is Akin to human trafficking, with the exception of a loved one doing it for another loved one.

toomuchlaundry

Also in the U.K. surrogacy isn’t a commercial transaction

Why do the surrogates not get held to the same standard? They are choosing to do this

It’s quite obvious the PP meant in the situations where the child is deemed to be so at risk that removal is the least worst outcome, not that babies should be removed from every formerly looked-after woman as a matter of course. You still have your children with you, I presume, so you are not in the former situation.

I can understand why your experience might make you sensitive about it, but you’re putting words in posters’ mouths.

It’s an imbalance of power.
While I do think the surrogate should also bear some responsibility for basically selling a baby they usually need the money

I am not sure where I stand with surrogacy, however the thought of a new-born baby being taken away from her Mother be difficult to swallow.

I don't think I have the right to have an opinion. That said, I wonder how many of the mumsnetters who are livid about surrogacy stories, also bleat on about pro choice and how a "woman should be able to choose what to do with her body".

I know it goes far deeper than that but that is my thought. As long as a baby has 2 loving parents it shouldn't matter. But of course, it does.

I would be interested to hear from people who were carried by a surrogate and if/how it affected them

It’s an imbalance of power.
While I do think the surrogate should also bear some responsibility for basically selling a baby they usually need the money

It's not selling a baby though is it, it's carrying one for someone else

I don't know how surrogacy affects babies. I am viscerally concerned about the impact, but I have no idea whether there is any basis to my concern. My issue with surrogacy is almost entirely based on the exploitation of women. Women's bodies are not there to be bought.

I think there would be a possible argument in favour of surrogacy, as with prostitution, if full informed consent could be obtained from all parties. I still think it would be bad for society, for much the same reasons (pertaining to commodification of bodies, etc, particularly women's bodies) and I would oppose it on those grounds alone - however, happy to thrash those issues out once people have found a way to get full, informed consent from the child at the centre of all this, the child who is being taken away from the only person it has ever known and whom some posters do not apparently consider worthy of consideration.

Maybe surrogacy should only be allowed once the child is over 18? [shrug]

I think there would be a possible argument in favour of surrogacy, as with prostitution, if full informed consent could be obtained from all parties.

It isn't possible to obtain fully informed consent from a foetus/infant. And that is the most important and vulnerable of all of the parties.

One of my friends recently expressed an interest in being a surrogate because she’d had three breezy pregnancies. I had to really bite my tongue. The bloody media have normalised this and makes it seem like it’s some lovely altruistic act. It’s awful.

Thank you! ❤💐

There is a lot of evidence which shows that being parted from the birth mother has a detrimental effect upon newborns.

But I absolutely agree with you that it is an appalling commodification of women's bodies as well as of infants.

It isn't possible to obtain fully informed consent from a foetus/infant. And that is the most important and vulnerable of all of the parties.

Exactly my point.

I am opposed to surrogacy in all its forms. It's a bit too Handmaid's Tale for me.

SelfPortraitWithHagstone

Beautifully expressed.

Tidsleytiddy

I think surrogacy is fine as long as all parties are fully aware of potential problems.

So where is the child, the most important person, in this transaction (because that is what it is)? How can they be "fully aware of potential problems"?

Yep.

No you don’t otherwise they wouldn’t allow people to donate organs to relatives. People survive fine with just one kidney. There are women who have a much reduced quality of life than some organ donors due to injuries from giving birth. There are lots of poor people who could gain money from selling their organs but of course this would be both women and men but surrogacy just affects just women. Funny that. Though I suspect selling organs would result in more women being affected due to higher poverty rates.

If you’re going to go for the argument that women should be free to choose what to do to their body but feel queasy at the thought of a poor women selling an organ to feed her family then you don’t believe in people choosing what to do with their bodies.

I have no idea what you’re on about. Honestly. What a ludicrous argument. One organ isn’t ideal now really is it.

“Gestational Carrier” this is a woman, the mother, not. Bloody bag used to store a baby for nine months and then be discarded. Disgusting term.

I was agreeing with you Hermione in case it sounds as though I think you used the term.

Look at it from the child’s POV. A child up for adoption has arrived there because they need parents through unfortunate circumstances like drug addicted parents, deaths in family etc. Social services vet adoptive parents with the child’s need in mind and reject any prospective parents who don’t meet standards. The whole process is on improving quality life for an already existing child. Obviously adoptive parents are choosing to be involved in the process but the child has not been made on order for them.

For surrogacy, adults purposefully create the situation where the child is given up to them. And in lots of cases especially third world countries are agencies running or even capable of running the kinds of checks to see if they’ll be fit parents?