Before I get into this story I should prefix that at different periods of time I’ve really struggled with bad relationships and money so what I’m about to say is not meant to seem judgemental at all.
There is a mum of a child in my dad class at school, the children are pretty good friends. We got chatting one time before Christmas and the topic of presents came up where became apparent quite quickly that she was struggling to get her child gifts and that by comparison we were in a fortunate position to be able to buy things for ours. The conversation honestly made me feel really bad and it was a prompt for me to reevaluate the meaning of gifts. Anyway it was after this that she asked me to go food shopping with her to keep her company. All the way round she was hinting that she couldn’t afford the shopping and she how she was so
worried she couldn’t cover it. I felt at the time trying to guilt me into paying for it. I was left a little annoyed.
regardless she asked me to lend her some
money to help with food, a few weeks later and as I could I did. But the messages
for money have increased and on more than one occasion have made less sense. In context I’ve given her probably 500
now. But I would send her 120 only to get a message two days later saying she had no
food again. I’ve had to stop as we are also feeling the squeeze and need to prioritise my kids. She promised a small
amount back, which is the only
part I’ve asked for due to
my phone bill, it didn’t come which left me
with late payments to manage. I feel pretty used and am
left thinking there’s more to this than simply money worries, to go through that much cash in a short period. She has a boyfriend living with her which without going into
detail, he’s contributing nothing, won’t look for work but is happy to eat all the food and take money from her account that was meant for bills. My previous caveat re relationships was important as I know how hard they can be but she’s openly said she’s not afraid to tell him to go. I said to her that he is happy to take take take so that her son basically goes hungry but she is also
guilty of allowing it to continue.
the last random request was that her sister was in trouble and she needed money for a taxi to go and help her. I said no.
But what’s really annoyed me is that her bf sister is staying with them and this morning they were asking for food from the school for apparently her son. Not only do I feel
mugged off but there are also
other kids struggling and knowing there is Something amiss here with the money I’m frustrated she’s taking resources away from
others. To be honest I want to block her but feel uneasy due to the kids friendship group. I don’t know if it’s drugs or what but something is going on and feel she needs some home truths. Am i being unreasonable?