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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Cleaner being cheeky?

123 replies

Leo1195 · 26/06/2023 14:36

A bit of context to begin, my cleaner is not from the uk she’s from a Spanish speaking country I am from the uk but can speak Spanish. She has lived here 7/8 years and worked from me nearly 2 years now. I have two children under two both myself and DP work full time but I mostly wfh.

My cleaner regularly asks me to buy her and her family plane tickets, and recently has just asked me again, this is maybe the 6th time. At first I was happy to help as she fed me a whole story, she can’t speak English and finds it difficult to book and so I was happy to help.

Second time same deal and I didn’t think anything of it.

Third time she asked I asked her how she managed all the years before me to book flights and she said she used an agency but they charged her - fair enough but was starting to annoy me a little because she was using an hour of cleaning time to sit with me look for the best deals on flight etc.

Fourth time she asked I reluctantly helped her but also put the Ryanair app on her phone and Skyscanner in Spanish and showed her how to use it. This time she calls me up when she needed to check into her flight and asks me to check her family in.

This also happens on the 5th time she asks and also asks me to buy her extra luggage. When I asked her why she can’t use the app she says it doesn’t let her search?!

she now wants me to look again in my own time she’s just this morning sent me the dates and said she still can’t do it. She also never pays me the money as they first few times I told her that she could just work off what she owes me but I’m getting a bit fed up. DP thinks I’m a totally pushover which I am really I hate saying no to people but I don’t know what to do now?

so AIBU - just help her out and buy her the ticket

or

yanbu - tell her to figure it out on her own.

OP posts:
hedgehoglurker · 26/06/2023 14:40

Yanbu.

CatchYouOnTheFlippetyFlop · 26/06/2023 14:40

She is taking the absolute piss out of you, but are you actually saying that you do not pay her a wage, just let her work her debts off, because that doesn't sound right.

IamRoyFuckingKent · 26/06/2023 14:41

Total piss take. Stop doing it.

kweeble · 26/06/2023 14:46

No wonder she gets you to book for her and her family if you pay for them! Say No.

IglesiasPiggl · 26/06/2023 14:46

Tell her you are no longer able to help with this and she will have to find someone else.

Sonyrec · 26/06/2023 14:50

FFS Op! You know the answer to this. I hope she's finished paying off the last lot - just tell her that she needs to sort herself out from now on.

Mars27 · 26/06/2023 14:56

YANBU, she's ripping the piss out of you.

When my cleaner started spending 2 hours to clean my minuscule bathroom and 5 hours to clean a tiny two bedroom flat every two weeks I started to get annoyed. What did it for me was when she started talking about her other "ladies", how they bought her plane tickets to her home country as a present and paid for private medical consultations. She was clearly expecting me to do the same so I dismissed her.

Quitelikeit · 26/06/2023 14:58

So how much are you owed in total?

Nevermind31 · 26/06/2023 15:03

Of course she can’t do it. Much better to no clean and downs that time looking for flights, and then not to pay.
either tell her it is taking too much of her time, or that she can send you the details, and her credit card, and you will book it for her but it cannot interfere with her cleaning.
but I would get rid, I don’t like CF

Tdcp · 26/06/2023 15:04

Hang on, you pay for her tickets/luggage etc? I'm all for helping people out but bloody hell OP. This really needs to be knocked on the head. Working off the money owed doesn't work for you any more as you no longer require her sponging services. End of discussion.

Appleblossompetal · 26/06/2023 15:15

i She also never pays me the money as they first few times I told her that she could just work off what she owes me but I’m getting a bit fed up.

She’s taking you for an absolute ride!

gamerchick · 26/06/2023 15:19

So it's an advance in wages and your time?

You know you're pretty much to blame for allowing this to happen?

Face it head on. You can't help her anymore, sorry.

gamerchick · 26/06/2023 15:20

Or let her go.

Luxell934 · 26/06/2023 15:22

You pay for the tickets? and have done multiple times? Well no wonder she's always asking 😂

Justkeepingplatesspinning · 26/06/2023 15:24

You've bought 5 lots of plane tickets etc already? As in you paid for them? If I'm understanding your post correctly then your cleaner has taken huge advantage of your good nature.
It's one thing helping them to work out how to use the booking app etc but quite another to be funding the purchase! I think you need a new cleaner tbh.

Sugargliderwombat · 26/06/2023 15:48

Assuming you don't mean that you have paid, just booked the tickets for her (as you say you looked for the best deals etc.) Then are you sure she isn't just illiterate? It's more common than people think.

Tdcp · 26/06/2023 16:07

Sugargliderwombat · 26/06/2023 15:48

Assuming you don't mean that you have paid, just booked the tickets for her (as you say you looked for the best deals etc.) Then are you sure she isn't just illiterate? It's more common than people think.

The cleaner has been working off the money owed to the OP.

ColdHandsHotHead · 26/06/2023 16:13

She's not being 'cheeky'. Children who answer back are 'cheeky'.

SallyWD · 26/06/2023 16:17

What?! Are you actually paying for all these flights?! That's crazy.

2bazookas · 26/06/2023 16:27

You and your cleaner both need to grow up.

Stop being such a sucker.

Leo1195 · 26/06/2023 16:29

The first two times I told her she could just work it off but since then she has not offered to send me the money (she has my bank details) or I’ve just missed her

OP posts:
Caroparo52 · 26/06/2023 16:31

Unfortunately this lady has seen your generous nature and is taking advantage of you. I understand that you pay upfront and she works off the loan as she cleans for you. But you are paying her to sit with you looking for her flights too!
Ha ha sorry op but you're a mug. I would definitely say that's a nono.
My cleaner was into this too but more as in could I pay in advance for next month's work as she had such and such bill to pay.
I did do this for 3 or 4 times, mounting to several hundred pounds upfront, but in the end I got sick of being asked so I just said sorry no I wouldn't do it anymore. No hard feelings, she still works for me so I presume she has worked out another way of managing her finances.

TulipCat · 26/06/2023 16:32

Is this a wind up? Surely nobody is this much of a wet lettuce?

Butchyrestingface · 26/06/2023 16:35

he also never pays me the money as they first few times I told her that she could just work off what she owes me but I’m getting a bit fed up.

On the bright side, OP, this one will never, ever leave you. Grin

LookItsMeAgain · 26/06/2023 16:35

She is one hell of a CFer!

Stop arranging flights for you. She is your cleaner. While it's nice to do nice things for people, she is WAYYYYYYYY over stepping expecting you to arrange her family's flights.

Has she actually bought any of the tickets herself?

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