To ask why there are so many kids with mental health problems?

[Newmama29]

I’ve been scrolling through some threads recently & I find people are talking a lot about their kids/teenagers having mental health problems. Why is this so prominent now? I, myself, was only a teenager 10 years ago so I am baffled as to how many people claim their teens have mental health problems. Is it just that we talk about it more or is society causing this?

Poverty , family breakups, school pressures, social media etc. The sanevad there is an incease in adult mental health

The internet

I think it's lots of factors.

Sure start centres closing and no early help for parents.

Covid.

Social media and an ever increasing digital world - we are still human with human emotional which gets overlooked when you can hide behind a screen.

Zero tolerance schools. Kids being afraid to make mistakes makes them anxious.

Ever ready world news 24/7 with a definite feeling of it being edgy currently

But added to that sorbets aren't as strict as they were when we grew up. Kids aren't left to their own devices as much to learn the real way and learn to risk asses.

It's not just kids mental health that's deteriorating - society as a whole has changed and human emotion hasn't evolved with it.

No resilience and no grit.

We also now pander to the minority in really odd way- see transgender issues and allowing normal life to be dictated to by a small minority who shout the loudest.

delusions of perfection perpetuated by social media.

Poor parenting in the sense that there’s perhaps not great discipline and now instead of children “being seen and not heard” they’re “seen and heard all the time”. There’s a happy medium there in that we should always be mindful of children and their opinions but also aware that they’re not decision makers or rulers of the roost.

Social media started it. Before then, you’d have a fall out with someone, go home and it might have been forgotten by the next day, or you’d try to avoid that person. Now it’s relentless. People can see into every corner of your life and use what they perceive to be power, over you.

Coupled with the pandemic and lockdown, which felt like a cruel punishment, it’s not surprising that the effect on mental health has been so appalling. Unfortunately, there are few resources to deal with it.

I said, right at the beginning of it, that the bigger issue would be mental unwellness. Now it is.

The social media thing has actually been evidenced - https://www.bbc.com/news/technology-55826238.amp

It has a really negative impact on mental health.

I think there sre quite a few things.

1. Children being in full time childcare from a very early age and having very long days away from their primary carer.

1. A really really stressful curriculum in schools with expectations put on children that are beyond their years. Like, in order to do well in the y6 sats at age 10/ 11 you need a reading age of about 14.

1. Touchscreen technology being a primary source of entertainment. Looking at a screen instead of actually physically playing.

1. They are bombarded with doom riddled information all the time. Constantly being talked to about the environment and global warming and how we are all going to die .

1. At the same time, they are being protected more than ever- allowed very little freedom and independence and not given the space to problem solve.

1. Social media . What a shit show for kids.

1. Crippling student

Etc etc etc

Whole combination of things.

Screen time, social media, digitally distracted parents

covid & the knock on impacts of that

a rush to diagnosis & medicalise vs recognising we all have to deal with uncomfortable situations at times

24/7 news cycle that is hard to escape

A desire for our children to be happy all the time meaning as parents we solve lots of problems for them until we can’t and then the problems feel a lot bigger

lack of meaningful connections, poorer social skills in general

better recognition & diagnosis

lack of support services & health services in general

Parents mollycoddling, lockdown and social media.

Lockdown after effects

I don't know, but having a son with MH and self harm, I would like to know if I could have handled things differently.

I think, generally speaking, social media is horrible. Kids can get bullied in their own bedrooms, a nasty thing said by one person is repeated by others. Also it puts unnecessary pressure to conform to unrealistic stereotypes.

Schools are a lot more pressurised than when I went. I am not completely convinced about the national curriculum. I can see it ensures that all kids are taught the same, but it is relentless and leaves no room for teachers to go over stuff again, so some kids fall further and further behind.

And some food is not great, over processed, full of stuff we wouldn't naturally eat.

Then there is weed. Lots of people tell me it's fine, won't hurt etc., But I am not convinced a growing, developing and maturing brain needs it. Unfortunately it's everywhere, it's very common and more kids smoke it than perhaps parents realise.

I agree - all of these things, plus:

Children aren't allowed to fail any more. Parents do their absolute best to ensure their children don't have any uncomfortable feelings, do their own risk assessments for things like climbing trees, timetable their every moment for clubs etc. The intent is obviously very well-meaning, but I do think this has also had an impact.

I have asked the same questions, we moved from UK to rural Sweden a number of years ago. My kids go to a small rural school only 16 in their class and I would say around 70% have or have had some kind of mental health issue.

Maybe social media, war in Ukraine, climate crisis, Covid, inability to afford rent (let alone buy), AI going to destroy humanity, pressure to live "best life", want a thigh gap, exam pressure, decline of bees, food insecurity and increased poverty.

Take your pick.

I work in young people's mh and it's like an avalanche of referrals. We used to have 40-50 a month, now 120.

I also think, to a lesser degree, we now have a tendency to pathologise the normal. I hear parents say "my child gets angry and shouts", that's not poor mh that's being a teen.

This

Comparison is the thief of happiness.

Lockdown - adults too.
I wierdly lost contact with a lot of people as juggling work & DC and nothing else
Social Media - from Dawn til dusk they watch stuff, compare themselves, see people doing stuff they not invited to. It's relentless.
School funding - less money for sport etc to give kids an outlet, only 1/2 hour lunch breaks.
Poor diets - my DC included
Constant gaming - if not on, missing out

I really appreciate these insightful comments. It seems like a cumulative effect of many different changes in society. I do believe that as a society in general we have became desensitised to negative news stories etc as we have access to it 24/7.

I now have a toddler & I am mindful of how I’m raising him to have resilience in the world. We are so mum-shamed if we give our child into trouble or let them cry a bit that our children are unable to regulate their own emotions later in life.

Social media, parents not keeping an eye on child's phone and internet use and the rise of indoctrination and brainwashing by left wing educators who confuse the minds of children.

Lockdown and social media are probably the main culprits.

I'm not convinced myself that it's particularly good for young children (under three, at least) to be in childcare settings all day. But I admit that's not something I have robust research to back up - I did look at some research eons ago but everything I found was about school readiness, and mostly for children from deprived backgrounds. So not really relevant to teenage mental health.

There's an increase in mental health problems in adults, too. Pretending that it's just kids and that it's just that they're not resilient or whatever is masking a wider trend.

We pathologise everything!
You can't be anxious about something it has to be anxiety and managed
You can't be sad, its depression

@Newmama29

I now have a toddler & I am mindful of how I’m raising him to have resilience in the world. We are so mum-shamed if we give our child into trouble or let them cry a bit that our children are unable to regulate their own emotions later in life.

I taught mine resilience by offering security, not by 'letting them cry' - resilience isn't going to be learnt by a toddler crying. I think you probably need to look into resilience a bit more before making bold statements that some children are less resilient because they didn't get into trouble. That's not at all how it works.

Covid, social media, stereotyping, peer pressure, exam pressure, family financial pressures, poor diets, lack of exercise, parents being more interested in their phones than actually talking to their children, schools being overstretched, curriculum too broad so children are too pressured, no time in the curriculum to pause, families being overstretched emotionally, financially and with time...

Absolutely nothing to do with social media or lockdown in our house. Ds had undiagnosed autism and was unsupported and horrendously bullied at mainstream school. Even now at 19 and in specialist education he's still massively struggling with his mental health.

And young people years ago did have mental ill health, it was often just hidden and not talked about. I had significant difficulties (not just normal teenage things) that my parents hid away, told me bad things would happen to me if anyone found out. Turns out I'm also autistic. Throw in some childhood trauma on top and I'm now in my late forties dealing with some of the issues that should of been supported 30+ years ago.

I agree OP. Definitely an overall increase not just an increase in diagnosis.

Chaotic family situations (so called 'blended families', different partners coming and going & general lack of children feeling safe and secure in their home).

Social media and the comparisons with others. Also, lots of children feel like they have propor relationships with total strangers online, while simultaneously having very limited social skills and relationships in real life.

General lack in this country of taking responsibility for your own actions. Always someone else's fault - school, government, council ect. This attitude get passed on to our children. This attitude also makes people feel like they don't have control (because nothing is their responsibility) and the feeling of no control isn't good for mental health.