Funny moments at funerals

[GwinCoch]

This isn’t really an AIBU, but thought it fit here the best. The other thread about dress at funerals made me think about how differently we all remember those we have lost. It also made me think about a very silly thing that happened at my Nana’s funeral where we all lost it to laughter.

I know there are cultures and people who believe in absolute solemnity. So this thread might not be for you, although of course you’re welcome here. But I have always found that laughter and silliness has made grief so much easier to deal with. So, this is a thread for funny moments at funerals. And for anyone who thinks that this is disrespectful or wrong, you are entitled to your feelings. But this is a thread for those of us who lost our mind to the giggles which were the other side of grief.

I gave another example on the other thread, but it was the same funeral - my paternal Nana. And because she never went to church but decided to be buried there (I have six relatives buried there) the vicar didn’t really know what to say about her, he didn’t know her. (That’s another issue for people to quibble about outside of this thread!) So my dad was working in Uganda, flew home and took care of all of the arrangements.

The service began: “And what can we say about this woman? Mother of five? Her middle son works in Uganda…” and the rest of the eulogy was about my dad’s job! Really?! We did the rest of the service and then went to the pub for the post-funeral and everyone was queuing up to talk to my dad - it was the funniest thing. We’re Welsh valleys we don’t mince our words but it no one was horrid it was just every minute “Raise a glass to Nana - but more importantly to her son who works in Uganda!” Everyone was howling and my dad kept saying: “She was a very private person!” We all call him SURNAME of Uganda now, like a Livingstone joke. He laughs about it too and has stopped defending it now!

At a relatives funeral and another relative with cognitive issues had suddenly realised there was an issue and had to be be tiled why we were there so all you heard was a really shocked voice going "what...he's dead? " had to bite my lip at that one.

I do tend to have the giggles at funerals though!

I’m pretty sure I’m going to hell for this one.

A coworkers wife passed away very young from cancer, at the visitation I’m with the coworker and others outside smoking. Please keep in mind these are the same coworkers I smoked with daily and we’d crack jokes 99% of the time we spent together.

A friend of the couple worked at the local zoo and had arranged for a ‘meet’ of one of the bears. She’s telling us about BoBo the bear (not his real name) and how he’s special and very intelligent. I couldn’t grab the words quick enough as they came racing out of my mouth. ‘So he’s smarter than the average bear’ damn near in the voice of Yogi.

I was mortified for the 3.2 seconds of silence before everyone started laughing (including the widower!).

The vicar got the names and ages wrong of my grannies kids at her funeral. Everyone was like ‘who the fuck is Janice?”

Granny would have found it hilarious

Standing outside after my Grandma's funeral, the vicar asked me how I kiss boys with so many lip piercings (3). I said "I stab them in the face and hope for the best". He walked away quickly. Why even ask that?!

I've honestly attended a cremation where someone's phone played Highway to Hell. Rip Baz. My own LH requested Fire at his cremation. I didn't think I'd laugh but some of the stories in the eulogy....

I can't speak for funny moments at a funeral. However, the night I got the call that my lovely Nana had an aneurysm, we all had to get to the hospital asap to say our goodbyes as she didn't have long left. It was a Friday and very late and I'd been on a night out so at this stage was quite drunk. I obviously ran like Forrest Gump for a taxi and the running plus having had a baby not long before, I ended up peeing myself. So I get to the hospital and everyone is beside themselves with grief (myself included but thankfully the alcohol numbed it slightly). Well peeing myself have everyone a lovely distraction as they're all close to peening themselves with my walking like I have rickets

My DS works with adults with SN. Many have serious health conditions and sadly one young man passed away. My DSis and colleague were going to the funeral where family had requested something bright. DSis add a bright red scarf to her work gear and her colleague wor quite a 'loud' patterned dress. They were sat in the crem thinking they couldn't see his mum ( only person they knew) but assumed they d missed her. Vicar started talking about 'Paul ' and how much he was loved and missed etc by his family and friends. Especially his wife 'Joan'....erm....how he loved his job as a bus driver....what????.suddenly dawns on them they are at the wrong funreal, correct name, correct place and time, wrong day , they were 24hrs early! Wearing bright colours when everyone else was in expected black/dark . They quickly hurried away after the service before anyone spoke to them but couldnt stop laughing on way back to work wondering if the family ever wondrred who those 2 women in bright colours were!

At my good friends Nanas funeral, her sister sat on the row in front caught her sleeve on fire from a candle.
15 years later we cry laughing talking about how we were inconspicuously trying to get her attention in the middle of the service

I delivered flowers for a shop as an after school job. I was 16.
One of my first errands was to the local mortuary with a car full of arrangements for some dead man I didn’t know.
The aisle up the front looked about a mile long, and I’d never seen a dead body before. I got halfway up the aisle and a disembodied voice said, “are you here for…”
I jumped about ten feet in the air and whelped and it turned out it was the mortician, who happened upon me as he was passing through.
The dead guy & I almost had a double funeral.
I thought the dead man was talking to me hahaha.

We have always welcomed/expected babies and kids at family funerals and weddings. We had one funeral it was fairly silent while a speech was ongoing and a baby let out the loudest fart I have ever heard, and I am well familiar with babies. The church was packed and the entire place just cracked up, it was a beautiful moment of respite from the solemnity. That moment however, went on for about 10mins before we could all collect ourselves, and even then every now and again there would be a giggle somewhere in the crowd. I do hope something similar happens at my funeral.

My uncle banned his alcoholic ex girlfriend from my nans/his mum's funeral. She turned up anyway. Pissed. We had rose petals handed round to throw onto the coffin instead of soil but she brought her own roses. Wailed louder than the people who'd known her all their lives. She stood behind me flinging roses over my head so my partner made room for her to come forward and respectfully throw the roses in. Now I bet you think she fell in. Thankfully she didn't but there was a tense moment when she wobbled precariously at the graveside with my partner behind her ready to grab her if she went over the edge.

Not exactly at the funeral, but the run up to it.
A friend (let's call him Jim) - Dad had died after a short, but grim, illness.
Jim's siblings and their partners had travelled from "up North" to see Jim and discuss Dad's funeral arrangements.
Everyone at Jim's house, waiting for Vicar to arrive.
Jim nips to loo and doorbell goes.
Jim's sister shouts "I'll get it", opens front door and welcomes in the "Vicar".
"Lovely to meet you, Vicar. I'm Enid, Jim's sister, and that's my husband, Arthur. This is Kevin, Jim's brother, and his wife, Doreen. Thank you for coming. Jim's told us how supportive you were when Dad was ill. Can I get you some tea or coffee? We've discussed what hymns we'd like at the service but Jim will be down in a minute and we can go through that with you."...........
Cue, one very confused chap who said,
"I'm not sure who you think I am but I've just come to collect the milk money".

And there's more....
Next day, Jim, his wife and the entourage from up North, go to Chapel of rest, as arranged with undertakers, to see Dad.
As they arrive, they see 2 young men going in to undertakers and they follow them in to see them going through a door off the waiting room.
Receptionist comes in to waiting room, and they tell her who they are.
"Oh yes. Follow me", she says.
She takes them in to a smallish room, coffin is on display, 2 young men from before are standing at the head of the coffin looking sombre.They shuffle up to make room for the incomers.
Enid says, "He looks lovely. So peaceful".
Doreen says, "He does".
Jim's wife is thinking, "That's not my Father in law......in fact....I think it's a woman!"...and, it was.
Jim manages to get everyone back to waiting room discreetly.
Receptionist was mortified.
The 2 young men were visiting their deceased Mum so God knows who they thought all these folk were.
Jim's wife had to leave the premises so she could laugh quietly, but hysterically in a nearby alley.

My extremely literal son does not get nuance and euphemisms. He struggles with people saying things that aren’t factual. We affectionately call him Drax the Destoyer.

At my FIL’s funeral, the priest was welcoming everyone to FIL’s service and burial. DS pipes up in the world’s loudest whisper that granddad is being cremated, not buried. My MIL started laughing which was the cue for the whole congregation to crack up.

DB had a train app notications (loud train horn blow) on phone to find way to funeral. When he got there he was a bit stressed and forgot to turn off phone. During the service the notification noise went off loudly twice. He was so embarrassed he just couldn't admit it was him. I still cringe...

My adored grandma died just before the pandemic and she'd converted to Greek Orthodox in the last years of her life. The service was like nothing I'd ever experienced. It was very solemn, mostly sung or intoned by the priest and reminded me of high Catholicism with the chanting and incense. My dad had warned me it would be long and after two hours, I felt quite overwrought. We had kissed the body in turn (wasn't prepared for that, open casket and very performative), listened to the priest intone about glorious worm food and crushing non believers and been standing for the whole 2hrs. Somehow, I had two lit candles, one in each hand and was feeling the pain of standing with my arms bent at 90 degrees, worried about my need to scratch my nose but unable to do so because I might very well set my hair on fire. I can't quite describe it but it was similar to when I had been a child and the enforced solemnity seemed to imbue the event with a faint note of desperate hysteria. I could sense we were drawing to a close and the priest was winding down his chanting with a prolonged and melodic "blessed are the meek". My brother ever so slowly and deliberately leaned over, laced his voice with as much as incredulity as he could manage at a whisper and uttered "the meek?" in my ear. Couldn't cover my mouth due to aforementioned candles, couldn't contain my mounting fatigue and hunger and now utter mirth. I was desperately trying to hide my laughter in tears and was saved only by everything drawing to a close. My brother and I had to Not Look At Each Other for careful long minutes as people started to exit the chapel. Grandma would have laughed I'm sure.

And years ago at DH's grandma's funeral a vicar who clearly hadn't known this battle axe of a woman - stern, judgemental, bosom-hoiked and curtains twitched before breakfast, - talked about a kind old dear in reverent tones. He finished with "and now we will play Brenda's favourite song from The Wizard of Oz" and as the strains of Somewhere Over The Rainbow played, FIL leaned over and muttered "oh thank God, I thought it was going to be Ding Dong The Witch is Dead".

Cousin's funeral was in a tiny historic church and as the pallbearers lifted the coffin through the door they held it too high and skimmed all 3 wreaths off the top on the low door frame. We hurriedly caught them/gathered them up and rearranged them best we could. They nearly did the same on the way back out.

At my grandad's funeral the vicar described him as a 'proud Englishman'.... we're Welsh (and the funeral was in Wales!)

At my Nan's she had a waltz played at the end during which the coffin was picked up and taken out, due to the timing of the music it genuinely looked like the pallbearers were going to start dancing down the aisle with the coffin which made us all beam with smiles!

At the funeral of an aunt of my DH.
His aunt's name was Alice.
When the vicar was doing the speech about her and said her name, my DH whispered to me...
Alice? Who the fuck is Alice?
I had to turn my hysterics of laughter into hysterics of grief.

For anyone wondering, Alice? Who the fuck is Alice? Is a Wigan Piet take on the Smokie song, living next door to Alice.

I still get the giggles over that now.

Lurking American here (sorry!) terminology might be different!

It was a stormy evening, I was attending my great aunts wake with my little sister who was about 13/14 me a bit older. My Aunt was in an open casket and bit by but people were walking up to gaze at her and pay respects. My little sister hadn’t seen very many deceased people. She went to pay her respects and was just staring in morbid fascination at the body and pondering her own mortality when BANG! Lightning flashed, thunder roared, and the lights all went out at once! She let out a single, long, blood curdling scream fit for the movies! When the lights came on she was all the way across the room, gasping for breath and pale as a ghost! I couldn’t help but laugh, but not many other people were amused! I’m surprised she didn’t scare anyone else to death!

The minister at my granny's funeral was a bit of a rambler, quite old and got some of his words muddled up.

We had already had the service at the church and were at the graveside. It had been decided that my granny's 4 children then the eldest child of each would be the ones to lower the coffin so we were all standing in full view of everyone, I was arm in arm with my cousin.

I'd sort of zoned out of what the minister was saying but was definitely paying attention when instead of "Lazarus's resurrection" he said "Lazarus's erection".

Because everyone could see us I couldn't laugh out loud, so I pressed my face to my cousin's shoulder so it just looked like I was crying rather than holding back laughter.

At my DMs funeral, baby dgd (3 months old, no-one to leave her with) filled her nappy in that noisy way only tiny babies can. Cue the front row of mourners dissolving in silent mirth. My Dm would have found it hilarious.

My 14 yo nephew died during lockdown.

Because we couldn't have the funeral we wanted, I was live streaming his funeral for his friends on Facebook. I used my nephews phone and Facebook account.

What I hadn't realised as wasn't really watching the screen that much, was last time nephew had live streamed, he'd used filters and they hadn't reset.

Everyone had a big comical cartoon moustache and beard.

My nephew loved to prank me, he had the last laugh!

Friends funeral and her brother was saying a few words. He was saying all the things he's going to miss about her, her laugh, her unwavering support, her late night phone calls to check he got home safe....just as he said it someone's phone rang!!!!

I don't have a funny story to tell, but this is without doubt an absolutely hilarious thread ! These stories have had me doubled up in pain with laughter !
😂

Elderly aunt's funeral was at the crematorium. The speakers played background music as you went in (ie piped music, not anything chosen by the family). The music was instrumental versions of popular songs. Didn't know whether to laugh or cry when I recognised Smoke Gets in your Eyes.

My granny went to her cousin's funeral. They had lost touch latterly. She took flowers and card that referred to happier times and a better relationship in the past. She put these near the front, with other family flowers

Just before the service started, she realised she was in the wrong crematorium, so she left, leaving the flowers behind

Some poor grieving family probably thought their dad had had an affair