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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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9
defi · 19/06/2023 13:23

Not one drop of sympathy she can't tell the difference between a cat and a child. We need to shine a light on this ridiculous ideology

Ameanstreakamilewide · 19/06/2023 13:24

Nah, not in the slightest.

Her behaviour was scandalous. If she's so confident in her ridiculous claims, then she can stand by them on SM.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 19/06/2023 13:24

MrsOvertonsWindow · 19/06/2023 13:16

I feel sorry for the cat girl. It's one thing seeing the little dinosaurs, police officers and fairies rushing around in Nursery or Reception classes. But a 13 year old identifies as a cat and a school goes along with it? On what planet is this acceptable?
Along with a serious mental health intervention, this confused child must be told that she may identify as a cat at home with her parents but this is a school and schools deal with facts and science - not pandering to delusions.

There is a girl in year 10 with my ds who identifies as a cat, she sometimes goes to school wearing ears and a tail, she doesnt go to school much though as apparently she has anxiety. I have spoken about it before but my posts were deleted.

Bathsheba1983 · 19/06/2023 13:25

@BCCoach @PowerTulle you clearly have no understanding of schools.
So you say it’s ok for students to covertly record conversations with teachers…
-what about ‘cat girl’. Her privacy needs to be protected. Don’t think for one second that the pupils at this school don’t know who this is and aren’t laughing at her.
-what if cat girl is very vulnerable. The girls doing the recording have said she should be in an asylum (allegedly) and are on record saying she is mentally very unwell. Those are horrible things to be out there online about you, imagine how she must feel.
-conversations in the background - recordings might catch something that needs to remain confidential/safeguarding etc.

i could go on. It is totally unacceptable to do this to a teacher and to then put it online.

as I said, I disagree 100% with what the teacher said, and I think she handled the whole thing poorly. But she doesn’t deserve this.

Bathsheba1983 · 19/06/2023 13:25

Unions?!? Hahaha!!! They’re the most ‘woke’ of the lot.

SunnyEgg · 19/06/2023 13:27

BCCoach · 19/06/2023 12:51

@Bathsheba1983 its acceptable to covertly record someone in a position of authority who is abusing their power. Undercover reporters do it. Whistleblowers in government and companies witnessing corruption do it. Workers in care homes witnessing abuse do it. Why shouldn’t schoolchildren witnessing abuses of power in schools do it?

I agree with you. They have no other recourse

It’s why whistleblowing exists as there’s a power imbalance

The teacher exerts it over the students when telling them to find another school and go to training

Dadalus · 19/06/2023 13:36

To all the people saying the girls were wrong to record this... If the DM had run this story just on the girls' word, and there was no audio recording, be honest would you have instantly dismissed it as fake?

PowerTulle · 19/06/2023 13:37

Bathsheba1983 · 19/06/2023 13:25

@BCCoach @PowerTulle you clearly have no understanding of schools.
So you say it’s ok for students to covertly record conversations with teachers…
-what about ‘cat girl’. Her privacy needs to be protected. Don’t think for one second that the pupils at this school don’t know who this is and aren’t laughing at her.
-what if cat girl is very vulnerable. The girls doing the recording have said she should be in an asylum (allegedly) and are on record saying she is mentally very unwell. Those are horrible things to be out there online about you, imagine how she must feel.
-conversations in the background - recordings might catch something that needs to remain confidential/safeguarding etc.

i could go on. It is totally unacceptable to do this to a teacher and to then put it online.

as I said, I disagree 100% with what the teacher said, and I think she handled the whole thing poorly. But she doesn’t deserve this.

No. You have not read my posts. Nowhere did I reference covert recording of anyone.

I’m asking you why you would be so opposed to being recorded, properly and with full knowledge, doing your professional duties? I’m curious. It seems to me that both teachers and pupils are being left in very vulnerable positions and I’m considering why teachers find the idea of classes being observed so abhorrent.

And as a school governor I’m very familiar with schools and activities directly regarding safeguarding. That is my first priority.

MrsOvertonsWindow · 19/06/2023 13:38

ZeroFuchsGiven · 19/06/2023 13:24

There is a girl in year 10 with my ds who identifies as a cat, she sometimes goes to school wearing ears and a tail, she doesnt go to school much though as apparently she has anxiety. I have spoken about it before but my posts were deleted.

That's awful. No teenager should be enabled to to expose her mental illness in this way to her peers. No wonder she has anxiety. The adults are completely failing her - and no doubt many of them hiding their genuine anxiety for her because an adult ideology (that has no business influencing children in schools) dictates that all acquired identities are legitimate.

What a safeguarding fail.

IwishIcouldButIcantSoIwont · 19/06/2023 13:38

hattie43 · 19/06/2023 06:30

This ideology is horrific . She should be sacked .

Correct

noblegiraffe · 19/06/2023 13:40

At 13 if I'd had a teacher saying that to me I'd have been incredibly upset and worried about how this would come back on me. Would I get into trouble? Would my parents be hauled in and told about what I'd supposedly done? Would I have to change schools?

They were wetting themselves laughing as they left, and seemed fully confident that their parents would be fine with them describing other pupils as weird or crazy, so I don’t think they were that worried.

ItsFunToBeAVampire · 19/06/2023 13:41

Dadalus · 19/06/2023 13:36

To all the people saying the girls were wrong to record this... If the DM had run this story just on the girls' word, and there was no audio recording, be honest would you have instantly dismissed it as fake?

Of course they would have called it fake, it happens all the time when dealing with this subject.

That's why instead of saying it's fake, they've moved onto the girls are bullies and must have edited the audio in order to make the teacher look bad.

It's not a good look for the ones that are defending this.

RedToothBrush · 19/06/2023 13:42

Bathsheba1983 · 19/06/2023 13:25

@BCCoach @PowerTulle you clearly have no understanding of schools.
So you say it’s ok for students to covertly record conversations with teachers…
-what about ‘cat girl’. Her privacy needs to be protected. Don’t think for one second that the pupils at this school don’t know who this is and aren’t laughing at her.
-what if cat girl is very vulnerable. The girls doing the recording have said she should be in an asylum (allegedly) and are on record saying she is mentally very unwell. Those are horrible things to be out there online about you, imagine how she must feel.
-conversations in the background - recordings might catch something that needs to remain confidential/safeguarding etc.

i could go on. It is totally unacceptable to do this to a teacher and to then put it online.

as I said, I disagree 100% with what the teacher said, and I think she handled the whole thing poorly. But she doesn’t deserve this.

CatKid needed proper protection then didn't they?

Not propped up by this bullshit which other kids are supposed to indulge behind the injustice of this ideology.

You CAN NOT blame the other kids for the safe guarding failures of schools, which left them feeling they had no other recourse but to whistleblow.

ArabeIIaScott · 19/06/2023 13:43

noblegiraffe · 19/06/2023 13:40

At 13 if I'd had a teacher saying that to me I'd have been incredibly upset and worried about how this would come back on me. Would I get into trouble? Would my parents be hauled in and told about what I'd supposedly done? Would I have to change schools?

They were wetting themselves laughing as they left, and seemed fully confident that their parents would be fine with them describing other pupils as weird or crazy, so I don’t think they were that worried.

'wetting themselves'

noblegiraffe · 19/06/2023 13:44

Wetting themselves laughing. What’s the problem there?

Ameanstreakamilewide · 19/06/2023 13:48

To me, it seems like the other kids laughing at Cat Girl is the least of her problems.

She needs professional support for her mental health, not being patronised and affirmed by ideologically captured dopey teachers.

ZeroFuchsGiven · 19/06/2023 13:50

noblegiraffe · 19/06/2023 13:44

Wetting themselves laughing. What’s the problem there?

Of course they were wetting themselves laughing, most sane people would after being sat down and told that a girl can be a cat.

noblegiraffe · 19/06/2023 13:50

To me, it seems like the other kids laughing at Cat Girl is the least of her problems.

Regardless, it is still a teacher’s job to intervene if people are being unpleasant to her.

HoofWankingSpangleCunt · 19/06/2023 13:51

SidewaysOtter · 19/06/2023 12:47

When you hear her saying it it sounds incredibly threatening and unpleasant.

Something else that isn't really getting enough weight is that a teacher was saying this to two children. If this happened to me as an adult I'd be pissed off and maybe upset, but I'd have the ability to escalate and I would expect to be treated fairly. I would know that I had certain protections, either by law, HR policy or whatever.

At 13 if I'd had a teacher saying that to me I'd have been incredibly upset and worried about how this would come back on me. Would I get into trouble? Would my parents be hauled in and told about what I'd supposedly done? Would I have to change schools?

The girls clearly suspected that they wouldn't be believed - and I would put good money that if they'd just relayed events verbally that they wouldn't have been - hence the recording. The teacher accused them of saying things they were adamant they hadn't (the "asylum" comment), made threats, made personal comments (the use of the word "despicable") and therefore I would say she has abused her power over them. This could so easily have escalated into an entirely unfair 'teachers word versus theirs' disciplinary issue against the students.

That they had the foresight to record it is to their credit.

1000%

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 19/06/2023 13:53

noblegiraffe · 19/06/2023 13:40

At 13 if I'd had a teacher saying that to me I'd have been incredibly upset and worried about how this would come back on me. Would I get into trouble? Would my parents be hauled in and told about what I'd supposedly done? Would I have to change schools?

They were wetting themselves laughing as they left, and seemed fully confident that their parents would be fine with them describing other pupils as weird or crazy, so I don’t think they were that worried.

‘Wetting themselves’ how do you know? I don’t think that is on tape , or has been reported? Were you there to observe this, or as a participant?

or are you just resorting to making stuff up?@

BorgQueen · 19/06/2023 13:53

She was telling absolute lies and berating the Girl, it’s unacceptable.
She should be disciplined at the very least and told not to believe outside training companies without doing research.

Butchyrestingface · 19/06/2023 13:58

She didn’t handle it well but she shouldn’t have been secretly recorded.

Yes, she should have, the bullying, delusional, dictatorial fud.

noblegiraffe · 19/06/2023 14:00

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 19/06/2023 13:53

‘Wetting themselves’ how do you know? I don’t think that is on tape , or has been reported? Were you there to observe this, or as a participant?

or are you just resorting to making stuff up?@

They were laughing as they left, it’s on the recording. They were laughing saying they’d caught it all on film.

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 19/06/2023 14:01
  • ‘it is unacceptable to record somebody. it is unacceptable to record somebody. Those people who say teachers should be recorded all the time, I just hope they can afford private school fees because trust me there will be an even bigger recruitment crisis if teachers were being recorded to check they had the ‘right’ views. This isn’t 1930s Germany.’

When I started out as a university lecturer 20 years ago I was told students were allowed to record me as some find it useful for their learning. I said ‘must I allow this? It adds to the pressure while I am finding my feet’ and was told I had no choice as it was an accessibility issue.
I haven’t noticed a recruitment crisis in academia.
While I understand the reluctance I think teachers will probably have to suck it up if it’s deemed useful for other reasons. Tbh if anyone is out to get you you’re probably better off with an actual recording as a group of students even without a recording could still get together and swear you have said something you haven’t.

SunnyEgg · 19/06/2023 14:03

Butchyrestingface · 19/06/2023 13:58

She didn’t handle it well but she shouldn’t have been secretly recorded.

Yes, she should have, the bullying, delusional, dictatorial fud.

Yep. How else would you prove what went on. People still excuse it with the recording, let alone without it.

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