How old were you when you had your last baby.

[summerfinn]

I was 22 having my first and will be 37 having my last. Just wanted to see is 37 a common age for having your last baby. I never dreamt I'd be pregnant at 37 . I always thought that it was a bit old. Now I'm scared that I'm just being selfish and could have a baby with lots of issues.

OMG only on mumsnet is all responsibility for unwanted pregnancy placed on a man. Contraception is free and so is termination in the UK. Having children is a huge responsibility and places a strain on most relationships so why on earth a grown woman of sound mind would choose to continue a pregnancy with a complete stranger is beyond me. That is a completely different scenario from choosing to be lone parent via sperm donor having thought about it carefully and sought fertility treatment. I am in no way embarrassed to have common sense I'm afraid, sorry to disappoint!

41, first and last

40 and it was twins!

42

I hope your boys don’t come home and tell you they’ve got someone pregnant with your attitude !

Didn’t say it was all his fault, you’re the one who was berating the woman and the woman alone. You didn’t say they both should have known better, did you? Took both of them to make a child, and that begins at sex. You’re quite right about contraception - it’s available to both men and women. As for termination, that’s a very interesting suggestion from a supposed Christian. Personally for me, pro choice means just that, and either way it’s a huge decision that a woman has to come to terms with. It’s not something to be used simply because a man cannot take responsibility for his part of the consequences.

You don’t have common sense, that’s simply what you’ve convinced yourself of your own opinion. You obviously lack the ability to see nuances in individual situations and certainly cannot see a lifestyle beyond your own being one that brings happiness, stability or ultimately well adjusted children. You evidently think that having a husband is key to all of this and in my own judgment that’s pretty sad. I know my (and others here) judgments of you will slide like oil on Teflon, you only care what those you consider equal or above you see about you. But you’re not coming across as a good person here, not an intelligent nor a well rounded human in general. You’ve built your self worth on a pillar of salt and sand, let’s hope one day it doesn’t crumble around you

So do I!

@TheSnootiestFox

must be gutting to follow all the rules you were set, and then see from the evidence around you that you needn’t have bothered…

By the time I had my second DC at 22 (a few weeks off 23) I already had my law degree from a Russell Group uni…shortly to be followed by my postgraduate qualifications and professional career. There are other ways of doing things. A person is not selfish because they don’t do things your way. My kids have loved having a young mum. And I love confounding people’s expectations about me! 😂

I had my kids at 27 & 31. I had 35 in my head as a cut off point, but actually, I probably would’ve pushed that to 38/39 if DH hadn’t wanted a third (he didn’t!).

I’ve got friends who had their last baby in their 40s. Seems more common these days.

OP, you are not being selfish having a baby at 37! Surely you haven’t been thinking that about the millions of 37 year olds and over who have been having happy healthy babies throughout their natural childbearing years for generations?

Enjoy your pregnancy and new baby.

38

It was the woman who made the decision to continue with the pregnancy based purely on benefits calculations in that situation.

And I actually am trained in sexual health and ran a drop in contraceptive clinic at the school I taught in. I might be Christian myself but I strongly believe we have a duty to the unborn. My argument always was that if Jesus can save a donkey from a pit on a Sunday then I can give out a few condoms in my lunch hour 😆 now, can you stop derailing this thread by attacking me? I was asked when I had ny last baby, I answered and explained my rationale. There was no need for any further discussion. I now no longer have a husband so no need to be sad 🤣 and the people who know me in real life will always tell you I'm the one out of everyone they know who has their ducks in a row, despite every type crap situation being thrown at me. So when my pillar did crumble it was business as usual because I'd put myself in a position to be able to keep calm and carry on. Like most intelligent well rounded humans do.

37

One at 31 and one at 33 (and done, I am now 38). I'm one of the younger mums in the playground though, I can't think of many who are under 40 in my child's Y2 class - v middle class area though

When I was in primary my mum was one of the older mums. She had me at 26 which is the age I had my first.

Thinking 26 to be an old mum seems hilarious now.

I'd prefer my kids to be in their 30s I think.

Had not long turned 35 before my last was born

34

First baby - 19 years old
Last baby - 33 years old

I was 22 with the first, 34 with the second.

personally I feel there are pros and cons to having kids “earlier” or “later” but I agree the OP was a bit unwittingly rude against older mums and people seem to have missed that.

1st at 20
2nd at 23
3rd and last at 26

Agh, no I wasn’t, I was 40. I’m 43 now. That almost 3 year old doesn’t sleep, I am so tired!

Also, everyone is different.

When I had my first at 22, we were financially stable. Owned a lovely home. I ran a successful business. Ex dh was 7 years older than me and earned mega bucks. I was still looked down on for being young.

When I had my next two at 34 and 40, me and now dh had nothing. I was back at college, we were renting, dh has a good job but it’s for a local authority so his earnings are shit. But it was okay, because I was older.

Cut myself off there - but eveyone who has ever commented in real life is of the feeling that I was somehow wrong to have my first at 22, and having my other two later was “better” even though my position was far, far better when I was young.

39. Almost 40

It's not offensive to educate oneself. Why turn everything into a battle?