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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is my friend BU to ask me to pick her up from the airport at 2am ?

614 replies

Eggsandpickles · 15/06/2023 08:12

She clearly wants to save money by not getting a taxi. There are no buses to our village at that time. A taxi would probably cost her around £85.
Thoughts ?

OP posts:
TheHighQueenOfTheFarRealm · 15/06/2023 08:23

I would do it for a close friend who does stuff for me too.

sparepantsandtoothbrush · 15/06/2023 08:24

We do among my family and friends. It's just a one off occasionally not every day so it doesn't bother me in the slightest.

I don't think she's being cheeky or unreasonable to ask but if you say no and then she gets annoyed then that would be unreasonable

Cosycover · 15/06/2023 08:25

Are you working the next day? If I wasn't then I would. If I was working I wouldn't.

CrazyArmadilloLady · 15/06/2023 08:25

Of course it’s unreasonable to ask!

I’d never dream of asking this of anyone - how rude. If you ask, you’re saying you want to really put them out. Inconvenience them.

Yes, they can say no, but most decent people will feel bad for saying no, so will either be guilted into it, or left feeling like a bad friend.

It’s so NOT OK to ask this of anyone.

Newmumatlast · 15/06/2023 08:25

MissBattleaxe · 15/06/2023 08:18

I wouldn't even ask family to pick me up at 2am. She should either stay in an airport hotel or pay for the cab. She's pretty much asking you to stay up most of the night.

See I would and they would me as my immediate family all go very much out of the way to help eachother and keep eachother safe. Not everyone does this though (growing up we were the family giving friends lifts and not getting them in return because parents wanted to ensure we were safe). So I would ask and wouldnt think unreasonable to be asked. It is then the persons choice though and wouldn't get funny if they said no

MySoCalledWife · 15/06/2023 08:25

Well you could end up waiting for hours (so many flights are delayed these days) and not get any sleep

big ask. I’d say no, if I had to work the next day. Skipping a full night sleep is too big an ask

SkyandSurf · 15/06/2023 08:25

It would not occur to me to ask anyone to pick me up at that time. Not even my husband.

Unless there is some backstory where she has recently done some incredible favour for you, I'd tell her it's far too late for you and you are unable to help.

L3ThirtySeven · 15/06/2023 08:26

I think is fine to ask, and find to say sorry you can’t as well.
It really depends on how close you are as friends.

icelolly12 · 15/06/2023 08:27

Personally I think she's very rude to ask as that time of pick up will impact you the next day and the night before.

LittleMonks11 · 15/06/2023 08:27

Cheeky mare

ThreePaws · 15/06/2023 08:28

If you’re close, she’s not unreasonable for asking. You can say no.

Plump82 · 15/06/2023 08:29

I couldn't ask personally.
We'll have to get a taxi from the airport in a couple of weeks. It's going to cost us about £100. When we booked, it should have landed in time for us to get the last train home. But the flight time has changed and we'll now miss that train by about 10 mins. And our opinion is, we'll just need to suck it up.

cestlavielife · 15/06/2023 08:29

Is your dd going with them? Are they staying with you and you will have to let them in?
If is to be a taxi and drop to their house then no
Unless she pays you and you need the cash
How far is it?

BeyondMyWits · 15/06/2023 08:29

Are you working or do you have plans for the next day? Would not be happy if it was a "work night", would be OK if a general weekend with nothing planned. (We have kids at uni abroad and it is a regular occurrence here, but even they know to travel on a convenient day, cheapest flights are usually nightime unfortunately)

Katiesaidthat · 15/06/2023 08:29

I wouldn´t do it, but then I get up at 6am to go to work. She needed to think about that when she saved some cash booking a late flight. Oh and these flights tend to be late, as they accumulate delays all through the day...

W0tnow · 15/06/2023 08:29

I’m in the minority here but I think it’s totally unreasonable to even ask!

x2boys · 15/06/2023 08:29

Well.it's up.to.you she can ask I don't think that's unreasonable
You can either agree or not ,either is reasonable.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 15/06/2023 08:30

To me it would depend to some extent on why she’s been away.

Holiday, no way.
Visiting a desperately ill close relative, probably, if I knew money was very short. But not if I knew she was regularly spending a lot on non essentials.

5foot5 · 15/06/2023 08:33

Out of interest, which airport schedules flights that land at that time? I thought most places avoid take off and landing in the wee small hours

Almostwelsh · 15/06/2023 08:33

Just bear in mind that while you're agonising about whether you should or not, she might well have texted the same request to everyone she knows and is just waiting to see who will be the mug who will do it. I've known people do that kind of thing.

Carrusa · 15/06/2023 08:33

I think it's fine to ask, and fine for you to say no.

My dad will always do this for anyone, and it doesn't compute for him why anyone wouldn't. So in my world it is a normal favour to give.

Original poster
Eggsandpickles · 15/06/2023 08:34

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER she ie going on holiday for leisure. She can afford a taxi but doesn't want to pay for one. It's a Sunday morning pick up 2am. In fact, the flight lands at 2am so maybe 3am by the time they clear security & get bags etc

OP posts:
similarminimer · 15/06/2023 08:34

I'd rather give her the money for the cab!

mewkins · 15/06/2023 08:34

Fine to ask as long as there is no pressure and also a promise of reciprocation. Some (my dad) would have said 'of course' to anyone - neighbour, friend, etc. Other people would just say no. Both are OK.

burnoutbabe · 15/06/2023 08:34

I think it's unreasonable to ask-unless you live together/their your parent/child or she also had your child with her

But without any prior experience of doing these sort of favours, asking out if the blue is cheeky as it makes you bad saying no.

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