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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is my friend BU to ask me to pick her up from the airport at 2am ?

614 replies

Eggsandpickles · 15/06/2023 08:12

She clearly wants to save money by not getting a taxi. There are no buses to our village at that time. A taxi would probably cost her around £85.
Thoughts ?

OP posts:
Strawberrydelight78 · 15/06/2023 22:51

Who ate you kidding? An airport taxi at 2am will be more than £20-£25. Some even charge for the time waiting for you in the airport. If you just ring a local firm from the airport they go by the metre now no set price from one town to another.

Strawberrydelight78 · 15/06/2023 22:55

Exactly this I don't drive and wouldn't expect it. Just book a taxi or train train that goes straight through to Manchester airport.

Viviennemary · 15/06/2023 23:07

I think she is cheeky asking. It puts you in an awkward position. She should either get a taxi or ask a member of her family.

Uokhon · 15/06/2023 23:25

My mum lives in Devon and her friends have driven/collected her from Heathrow before and she has done the same. This is what friends are for.

changeyerheadworzel · 15/06/2023 23:27

Not a GHOST of a chance. Daytime, no problem.

azimuth299 · 15/06/2023 23:32

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/06/2023 13:04

@Fisharejumping

lol how could it possibly be an adventure?!

Show quote history

To be honest, my DD would absolutely love this. Staying up really late or waking up in the night, getting into the car in her jammies and maybe a blanket, seeing the world at a time she doesn't usually get to see, chatting in the car, monitoring the flight via phone. If we stopped at a drive thru and she got to do the playlist that would be extra fun. And she gets to see her friend in the middle of the night!

My DD is a little younger I would imagine, but I could absolutely see her considering it an adventure.

Salome61 · 15/06/2023 23:39

A friend has regularly said to ask her if I need collecting from the airport. As I've got older I've got nervous about driving especially at night, so I'd never be able to return the favour and always get a taxi.

I was very grateful to my experienced taxi driver a few months ago. I arrived back at the airport at 9 pm at night, in very thick fog. Driver was very careful and my normal 45 minute journey home took an hour and a half.

Summerfun54321 · 16/06/2023 00:02

Just ask her is there a reason she can't get a taxi. Let her make the awkward excuse not you.

NatashaDancing · 16/06/2023 00:26

Sigmama · 15/06/2023 21:59

Getting to and from an airport or train station is part of the expense of travelling, how does she think people without cars manage, cf

Exactly - "all this helping a friend out" guff is, well just guff.

mellicauli · 16/06/2023 00:52

Play the safety card. Say there's no way you can drive between 2am and 4am, as you'd be too sleepy to drive safely. The fines are quite heavy now and you can't afford to risk it.

JimJamJo · 16/06/2023 00:53

I would rather pay for the taxi myself!

BadNomad · 16/06/2023 01:05

How did she get to the airport?

Joystir59 · 16/06/2023 01:42

Almostwelsh · 15/06/2023 12:16

I was asked similar. I just responded "mate, I wouldn't even drive myself from the airport at xxx o clock" which is true. Don't think my friend took offence.

When I travel I pay to park my cat at rhe airport. It works out cheaper than a taxi both ways and doesn't put anyone out.

You've got a helluva a useful cat

captainmarvella · 16/06/2023 01:47

Eggsandpickles · 15/06/2023 08:12

She clearly wants to save money by not getting a taxi. There are no buses to our village at that time. A taxi would probably cost her around £85.
Thoughts ?

In my country/culture this is not ever done, no one would dream of asking a friend to pick you up that late. You take that liberty only with a family or you just wait until 6am or so in the airport itself so that it's at least bright when your family drives to pick you up. Here it's not safe for women to drive alone, and even otherwise, it's considered massively rude to ask a favour that would disrupt one's sleep, unless it's a dire emergency.

UNLESS, the "driver" friend has a history of picking up people from the airport (like a side job) and/or the friend is paying for the trouble.

However I know things are obv different in the UK, so here's my question for you, OP: how was the request framed to you? Was it "Dear Friend, Is it possible to pick me up at 3am? Would that be okay? Of course I will gladly pay for the petrol costs". Or was it a blase CF style ask?

By the way, YADNU to say no. It's a request for a favour that will involve you driving in the middle of the night, in a non-emergency. No one is obligated to grand such favors, even to besties and family.

Also I am quite speechless that OP's friend thought it was ok to use OP as a cab service - she is not even visiting or staying in OP's home, she will just get picked up at the airport and get dropped at her own place, courtesy of OP's time and petrol money?! LOL.

RantyAnty · 16/06/2023 01:48

3 hour round trip???? That would be a hell no.

Either say no, or if you want an excuse, just say you'll be gone that weekend.

CrazyArmadilloLady · 16/06/2023 02:17

All the people saying they’d do it, if asked…

OK fine - but would you ask someone to give you a three-hour round journey lift in the early hours of the morning? Because that’s the topic being discussed.

Seriously, would you?

If your answer is ‘yes’, you’re a CF.

coxesorangepippin · 16/06/2023 02:39

Your friend is unreasonable to put you in this position

She shouldn't have asked you this!!

Shame on her

LAMPS1 · 16/06/2023 03:06

I agree that she shouldn’t have asked you. She is unreasonable to put you in this position.
My response would be that it would be much better to book a taxi because the earliest you would be prepared to wake yourself up on a Sunday morning would be six thirty ( or whatever) Your weekend rest is important to you and so sorry but you really aren’t prepared to be up all night tracking her flight to see if it’s on time or not.
it’s not that you can’t be bothered OP, it’s that it just doesn’t make any sense to miss a nights sleep when there is an £80 alternative.

mjf981 · 16/06/2023 04:15

She's being unreasonable and putting you in an awkward spot.

I wouldn't ask this of a friend unless I was desperate. She's not. Asking a friend to miss out on a night's sleep is a massive ask. She needs to fork out for a taxi.

mjf981 · 16/06/2023 04:17

Or on reflection you could offer to get up early and pick up her first thing (8am?).

Then its up to her if she wants to hang around until then, or pay for a taxi to get home earlier. And you still get a decent night's sleep.

HerbsandSpices · 16/06/2023 04:29

I would suggest she gets a hotel at the airport and I'd pick her up in the morning at a sensible time. Me driving at 2am isn't a good idea. I don't so well with sleep deprivation and wouldn't have good focus.

PeloMom · 16/06/2023 04:33

She’s not unreasonable to ask but you can say ‘no’ without being unreasonable as well. As you said, will probably be closer to 3 am if not later by the time they get their bags. They can easily sit in a cafe till the first bus/ train starts running a couple of hours later.

Dunnoburt · 16/06/2023 04:43

Wouldn't bother me, I'd do it, as long as she paid petrol and parking. But then I am a terrible sleeper so up half the night anyway!!

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 16/06/2023 05:13

CreepingJenny · 15/06/2023 10:25

If a taxi is £85 then it’s probably around an hour away going by taxi charges here, so cost to OP two hours petrol plus all the airports I’ve picked people up from there’s no way you can escape the pick up charge which is min of £6 and that’s if the plane lands on time - I’d say no that’s like being up all night long 😱

I've done massive favours for close pals/fam... And they, me.

But..? those actual times?? Unless it was an absolute emergency? (rather than saving THEIR dosh - unless they're fully covering fuel/pick up costs??)

As this poster says... It would be like being up ALL night...

2am flight... Assuming about an hour travel.. Need to leave home at prob 130 am..... (just in case they clear passport/luggage quickly.) .. So either you'd have to not go to bed at all, or have a couple of hours and get up at 1am 🙄.

Prob 3am when get to car park... Then an hour home... So 4am...so when I'm actually tucked up in bed - prob 430 am... It will soon by light... So I'll have zero 😴!

Id be like a zombie after those overnight expeditions!

NatashaDancing · 16/06/2023 05:34

PeloMom · 16/06/2023 04:33

She’s not unreasonable to ask but you can say ‘no’ without being unreasonable as well. As you said, will probably be closer to 3 am if not later by the time they get their bags. They can easily sit in a cafe till the first bus/ train starts running a couple of hours later.

No. Friend is completely unreasonable for asking this.