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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if you've ever been arrested, and what for?

108 replies

ChittyBangabang · 11/06/2023 17:26

With Sturgeon being arrested this afternoon, my friends were discussing this and surprised that some had been arrested. Included for protesting and also driving offences, but one also for fraud (acquitted) and one for shoplifting (dropped).

Anyone else?

OP posts:
Tigofigo · 11/06/2023 23:51

RumNotRun · 11/06/2023 22:48

Once for attempting to pervert the course of justice. Long story but basically I was just an idiot and didn't think through the implications of the text I sent to someone. CID arrived at my student halls and I offered them tea and coffee. They then said they were there to arrest me. I was 😲 The police in the custody suite were lovely, we were all chatting away, then they asked me to empty my pockets. I laughed thinking they were joking. Umm..no. on the booking board thing they wrote my name and then just "pervert" which we joked about (I had a mini set of handcuffs on the keys in my pocket)

Cells were the worst, I tried not to think about what bodily fluids some of the graffiti was written in! I smoked continuously as I could keep my cigarettes but no lighter.

Eventually it all got dropped as they realised I was just an idiot who got involved in something that was more serious than I realised. Thank goodness! I've behaved well (mostly) since then as I never want to be in a cell again.

I really am intrigued to know what the text said!

I've not been arrested but have been subject to a drugs raid and interviewed by the police as part of that.

Rolypolyfishheads · 11/06/2023 23:54

I was once arrested on suspicion of being over the limit because I drove over an awkward mini roundabout rather than just going around it. I wasn't over the limit at all, just being lazy! The officers who stopped me didn't have a breathalyser unit with them so arrested me and took me to the station where I had to wait ages. When it was proven I was innocent they drove me back to my car and sent me on my way!! The second time I was arrested I was in the wrong and was charged and went to magistrates court where I received a 12 month conditional discharge order. The reason was because I punched my exs new girlfriend who was right in my face screaming at me and being really aggressive. I just saw red and lashed out. She had been hurling insults at me all night (I had gone to meet a friend in a bar and they happened to be there too 🙄) she was accusing me of being abusive to my ex who had bullshitted to her about our relationship. My ex was extremely abusive and made me seriously mentally unwell 😔 this will be on my record forever and stops me from getting certain jobs. Both of the arrests were in my 20's, I'm 45 now.

Imnotdrinkingmerlot · 12/06/2023 00:01

Arrested for breach of the peace- sabouteuring a fox hunt. But luckily no charges were brought as I need a clean slate for my job.

I'm good as good in most ways though - never even had a point on my licence - so doubt anyone would guess!

dizzydizzydizzy · 12/06/2023 07:50

Not so far. Thinking of calling the police on DP though due to domestic abuse so he might get arrested.
(He has just told me that the headteacher who committed suicide due to a bad ofsted was stupid....... I felt like telling him he was the stupid one)

Twilightstarbright · 12/06/2023 07:53

Never but I remember talking to DH about it and his Dad and siblings all have been arrested and have criminal records. I was shocked.

CosmosQueen · 12/06/2023 07:59

No. I did know a chap who had been arrested and in prison multiple times for various offences. Apparently he was ‘easily lead’ so never his fault 🙄
He was actually a really quiet person, did a lot of voluntary work with ex-offenders and rehabilitating offenders for years afterwards.

Wrongsideofpennines · 12/06/2023 08:08

I've never been arrested. But I worked with the loveliest woman in social services who had been arrested at 16 (now in her 60s) for throwing a bottle at a celtic football match. It hit a police officer and therefore was taken far more seriously than otherwise would have been. She had had to declare it for every job ever since and it had caused some issues obviously with CRB and DBS checks.

Desiredeffect · 12/06/2023 08:11

Yes common assault and had a police caution but now spent as doesn't show up on my db's

Florissante · 12/06/2023 08:22

That's a hoot. And good for the police for playing along.

Florissante · 12/06/2023 08:22

No, I've never been arrested.

Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 12/06/2023 08:25

Yes. Just past midnight, two police and aDOG banged on the door until I got up and opened it after looking out of the top window. Arrested ( refused to say why) and taken to Paddington Green, put in small room and asked quite a lot of personal questions about my ‘associates’, whilst refusing to say why.

I was allowed my phone call, so I rang my boss . Our agency handled Metropolitan Police Recruitment at that time(!) so he was able to make some more calls and get me released.

it turns out that someone had somehow put me on a list of known associates of some very nasty people, this was before computer records really took off so ‘paperwork’ was strewn with errors. Very spooky, though I was remarkably calm about it in retrospect.

Porkipye · 12/06/2023 08:50

Never been arrested but a nasty shit
who I worked with could not do his job and took credit for my work , eventually joined the police force and threatened to arrest me and cuff me at the earliest opportunity. He said it would be a great pleasure to lock me in a cell . He started act like a policeman the moment he was accepted on to the force , it went to his head . He was insufferable while he worked his notice.

He was also going to run me through the police computer to see if I had a criminal record as I once lived on a rough council estate .

He actually slowed down to glare at me in his cop car when I was waiting at the bus stop one day . I wish I could have got this on camera. But after certain things that have happened in the police force I guess he would not dare do this again . He tried to speak to me in a supermarket recently, I just blanked him .

OpenDoors72 · 12/06/2023 09:45

Never. My boyfriend was arrested loads as a teenager and in his 20s for getting in fights.

He's late 30s now and became more sensible when he had children. He has a fairly senior professional job he gets strictly background checked for.

ISpyWithMyCamerasEye · 12/06/2023 10:14

Name changed for this.
Yes, I was arrested and charged with gbh with intent which also saw me imprisoned for three years.
This was over 20 years ago.
A cousin beat her then 8 month old baby, resulting in the baby suffering a fractured skull.
I got hold of my cousin and left her wishing she'd never raised her hand to her baby.
I still stand by my actions to this day.

TheFormidableMrsC · 12/06/2023 10:32

Yes I have. My ex husband and OW were desperate to justify their abusive behaviour by making false allegations about me so that they could say "we had to have her arrested, she's mental" etc. So my ex totally set me up, we were having a text conversation about our son who was only 3 at the time. In the middle of the conversation he said "stop texting me". I was confused because we hadn't concluded the conversation and it wasn't an argument so I carried on.

Several days later I get a knock on the door early one Sunday morning. I was arrested for harassment. He'd made a complaint that he'd asked me to stop texting and I hadn't and he felt harassed. I was taken in a van, having to leave my children alone, and it was possibly the most horrific experience of my life. To my shock, my ex had not provided the police with the "evidence" and once he knew I was in custody he took hours to bring print outs to the station. Once the police actually saw it, they had nothing to keep me for. It was obvious. However, they still tried to get me to accept a caution and I said absolutely not. They bailed me for a few weeks during the which my ex did everything he could to try and get me to break my bail conditions. Finally I was released from bail and I made a formal complaint to the IOPC. I did get an apology eventually but my God, it was the most traumatising experience and I ended up with PTSD. I am still scared of the police and would never ever approach them for help unless it was utterly desperate.

BellatrixLestrangesHeatedCurlers · 12/06/2023 10:33

@ISpyWithMyCamerasEye if I was going to be arrested, it would likely be something similar. Defending something helpless and innocent from harm is worth it.

mindutopia · 12/06/2023 10:34

I wasn't arrested but while living in the US, I once got a citation for riding my (push) bike through a stop sign on a bike path in a park. It wasn't the sort of thing I could just pay for. I had to go to court because it wasn't a 'traffic violation' because I was on a bike. Literally spent most of the day in court waiting to be called up, with everyone else who was there for public intoxication or urinating in public (lots of indecent exposures!), and then the judge didn't even know what to do with it, but my lawyer just recommended pleading guilty to whatever just to get it over and done with as I couldn't dispute that I did in fact ride through a stop sign on a bike path on my bike. The judge ended up giving me a charge of disorderly conduct, which was a minor misdemeanor. I paid $275 in a fine and I had a criminal record!

40-something me would have fought it as it sounds so ridiculous now (my lawyer said he'd never seen anything like that before, but there were a few of us that day with the same charge from the same power crazy park ranger, so he must have been having quite a day). But 20 year old me was just too stressed about it to do anything but just do what the lawyer and judge said and get out of there as quickly as possible. I've had to declare the bloody thing on every visa application since as it's possible it could still come up. Thankfully, as not in the UK, doesn't come up on my DBS.

Mybusyday · 12/06/2023 10:42

ISpyWithMyCamerasEye · 12/06/2023 10:14

Name changed for this.
Yes, I was arrested and charged with gbh with intent which also saw me imprisoned for three years.
This was over 20 years ago.
A cousin beat her then 8 month old baby, resulting in the baby suffering a fractured skull.
I got hold of my cousin and left her wishing she'd never raised her hand to her baby.
I still stand by my actions to this day.

How awful! I would have done the same

TheFormidableMrsC · 12/06/2023 10:43

Further to my previous post. The same delightful ex husband applied for a gun license as my dad had taught him to clay pigeon shoot. The police came to our house to interview him (and me) and suddenly said "so about your criminal record". I had absolutely no idea. Not a clue. He had a very long record, largely junior offences, but had failed to mention this to me. I should have seen that red flag and run. He had every excuse though. I was very stupid.

Mojitosaremyfavourite · 12/06/2023 10:47

Aged 18 me and my best mate pissed up and rowdy. Wearing traffic cones on our head and shouting in the middle of a busy road, that kind of thing.
Both of us arrested .. bunged in the police van and carted back to the station. We got a telling off and two officers took me my mate into a different room each. Pretty much chatted us up. Told us off and then let us go.
Very weird and surreal and sooo long ago now.

Oldenpeculiar · 12/06/2023 10:54

Twice!

First one I was 18 and out with a friend and a gang of girls decided we shouldn't be on their street, there were about 8 of them and two of us and I gave a couple of them a good walloping because they wouldn't let us get away and I needed to defend myself , the police split it up and we were all arrested, a local shop had CCTV and the girls were known for it in the area, and the footage showed us trying to get away and at one point me being under 4 of them getting a kicking.
We were all cautioned with disturbing the peace or maybe causing an afray (something along those lines, it was a long time ago)and allowed to go home after being in cells for a few hours.

I was also arrested while at work, two rival sports teams started a mass brawl in the club I worked in and I was in the middle of it trying to split it up and got hauled into a van, we didn't wear uniforms and my name badge had come off. They verified my identity with the useless security staff and let me out the van, I'm not entirely sure I was actually properly arrested though that time, more grabbed, cuffed and flung in a cage in the van until things calmed down and the security staff told the officers they'd nicked a member of staff. I don't suppose my "I fucking work here!" Helped my case much though 😜

Gerrataere · 12/06/2023 10:54

Not me, but I had to be an appropriate adult for someone as their parents were not in capacity to go to the station. It was the most horrific few hours of my life, they had been accused of something very serious and the interview went into great detail of their alleged crime. Couldn’t risk a conversation in the holding cell as absolutely anything could implicate themselves. So hours in silence, no food or drink, just overthinking everything.

A police car pulled up on my street the other day and for a moment I thought the officer was coming to my house, I nearly had a full panic attack. I will never get over that experience.

TheFormidableMrsC · 12/06/2023 10:59

Gerrataere · 12/06/2023 10:54

Not me, but I had to be an appropriate adult for someone as their parents were not in capacity to go to the station. It was the most horrific few hours of my life, they had been accused of something very serious and the interview went into great detail of their alleged crime. Couldn’t risk a conversation in the holding cell as absolutely anything could implicate themselves. So hours in silence, no food or drink, just overthinking everything.

A police car pulled up on my street the other day and for a moment I thought the officer was coming to my house, I nearly had a full panic attack. I will never get over that experience.

This is what I'm like now, so traumatic. The fear in my stomach when I see a police car driving down my road. I recently had a situation where half a dozen police knocked at my door, they had got the wrong house, and I had a full on panic attack. So I totally hear you about how these things impact.

onefinemess · 12/06/2023 11:03

I was deported from the US when I was 22.

No idea why, first time there, didn't even get through immigration.

Can't ever go back there without a formal interview at the US embassy.

Literally had a "please with here one moment", next thing I was being escorted to a holding area, wasn't allowed to leave, waited 11 hours for the next flight back to the UK.

They wouldn't tell me why, and I still have no clue what it was all about.

My friends joke that they won't ever fly with me in case they get "caught up in your international man hunt".

icantlivewithouttea · 12/06/2023 11:13

I was wrongfully arrested when I was about 19/20. I was out shopping with a friend when two policemen came into the shop and accused us of stealing something. We were taken to the nearest police station and kept in custody for about 4 hours. It was horrible to be accused of something we didn’t do - we were questioned for ages and searched.

we were eventually released with no charge as they had no evidence of us being the culprits. No apology from the police. Horrible experience.