For wanting a boob job?

[Ilovemycatalot]

For context I’m 44. Small ( think A cup) very saggy boobs. Body shape an apple and clothes just look awful on me because I have no balance to my body just wide hips and a flat chest. So many more things I could do with the money but never do anything for myself. So am I being selfish? Would take a bit of saving money wise but I hate my body and even 15 yr old girls have bigger boobs than me! Just sick of clothes looking crap on me no matter what I buy.

I don't think it's selfish. Sounds like it will improve your confidence and I think that is priceless.

I do think YAB a bit U, not because I think it is 'selfish' to spend the money but because I tend to think plastic surgery is unhealthy both mentally and physically, really.

But I am not you and I do not know how much this affects you, so you have to do what you think is right.

@EatingWormsMichael thank you just not used to treating myself lone parent always put myself last.

Apple shapes normally have bigger boobs but I definitely missed that bit.

My feminist side says YABU. You should be happy with your amazing body, boobs included, and it matters not one whit what shape you are.

My not so feminist side says YANBU, if you can afford it (you and your children not missing out on treats, holidays etc so you can get implants) then absolutely do it.

BUT please research research research and use a reputable and experienced surgeon.

@CalistoNoSolo My dd 16 now and gets everything she wants within reason. Sometimes I think is it worth it at 44? Just feel fed up with always looking like crap.

I am the sort of mum that hasn’t had a haircut in a year because I feel guilty about it… when actually in my heart I know it’s fine to do things for yourself too and would be the first to say that to a friend. I feel for you because mum guilt is REAL!

saying that if I had the money I would one hundred percent be getting a boob job and some dental work done

I think the only way it would be too selfish was if the money being spent on the boob job was directly impacting the wellbeing of your children e.g they are not being properly
provided for because the money is going elsewhere

Just please don’t go to a dodgy surgeon in Turkey

There are so many padded bras, not just stuffed with foam, but actually squidgy. And chicken fillets.

You could die for this elective surgery. Like what happened to Kanye West's mum.
What would happen to your DC if you died.

I just don't understand the point tbh. Society has decided that women's should look a certain way so we spend thousands on dangerous surgery to comply. Fuck that.

How do you look in the same clothes with chicken fillets?

With a 16 year old DD I think it's important to set an example about loving your body as it is.

But I want proper boobs when I take my bra of not saggy small ones. I want to look at my body and feel at least satisfied with it.

If you genuinely think it will make you feel better then of course do it. I've got 10yrs on you, 44 is young!!

@Oysterbabe my dd has no boobs either takes after me but she’s body confident and has a lovely figure so not affected by it at all.

A lot of people with implants lose the sensation in their nipples.

People miss breast lumps and die of easily treatable breast cancer.

You have to replace them every ten years or so.

Risk of death from a leak.
Risk of deaths from anaesthetic.
Risk of infection meaning you lose your actual breast.
Risk of leaving your DD to cope without you.

Your daughter will possibly inherit your figure. Do you want her to face such risks?

Listen ... I had weight loss surgery in Poland 7 years ago and went from a size 22 to a size 12..

... and have maintained it because I never want to be that unhappy with my body again (steroids made me unbelievably hungry and I trebled my weight in 5 years)

Best decision I ever made .. for me, my self esteem , my husband (who didn't fancy me at that weight understandably ) my kids (who wanted me to run around with them and be healthy) and for the NHS budget (no more diabetes type 2 clinics, blood pressure, and sleep apnea clinics )

GO FOR IT !!

My daughter had one years ago. She went to BUPA and the plastic surgeon mainly did burn surgery, but his money-making side was cosmetic surgery. He was very good and she's seen him a few times for check ups since. Make sure you get a reputable NHS surgeon.

Will she be so confident after she sees that to you the risk of dying during surgery is worth it, rather than have the same hideous figure she has, or will have in 20 years?

Yes it's unlikely you will die during the surgery. But every year some do. Do you think they expected to die during a boob job?

@MIBnightmare that’s amazing and well done for keeping it off. Seems like it was well worth it for you.

I hate my body and even 15 yr old girls have bigger boobs than me!

But I want proper boobs

I'm really small too, who give a fuck about teenage girls.. I have proper boobs. You have proper boobs.

Oh FGS, what would you do if you needed surgery? Just say Not I won't thanks, I'd rather live with my problem than risk dying.

Don't do it.
Look up capsular contracture. It is horrendous. And it happens a lot.
Work on your self esteem without undertaking expensive and potentially dangerous surgery.

Personally, I think it's an absolutely horrible message to be sending to your daughter, but that's just me.

I also think it's madness to electively put yourself at risk for horrific complications. And they can be absolutely horrific. I've had 15 major operations that I had to have due to health issues, and I was lucky enough to get through them well. I would never risk my children losing their mother or the mum they know just for some fake tits.

I had mine done nearly 8 years ago and I can honestly say it was the best thing I did.