To have challenged teenagers at the park?

[KiteSirfer]

I was with my two dc aged 6 and 9 at the playground in the park this evening.

Three young teenage boys were kicking a football. I asked them to stop, or to move into the park rather than nearly hitting young children in the playground. They became quite mouthy, refusing to move. So when their ball almost hit my kids for the second time, I picked it up and put it in the bin, to prevent them keep nearly hitting young kids with it.

All three of them then started arguing with me, calling me crazy, swearing, claiming it was child abuse I'd put their ball in the bin. Of course they easily retrieved the ball from the bin, then kept arguing with me. I was quite calm, kept explaining why their behaviour was dangerous and why Id asked them to stop. They also filmed me without my permission but I didn't say anything 'wrong'. Eventually they calmed down and we parted company.

Aibu to have challenged them? I'm a bit concerned they filmed me in discussion and claimed 'child abuse' for putting their ball in the bin. I should probably have walked away. The level of disrespect they had for adults and other children was quite sad and astonishing, I don't know how teachers deal with this level of disrespect, their language and behaviour was awful.

I am with you OP. I hate dealing with antisocial, swearing teens when taking my toddler DS to playgrounds designed for pre and primary age children.

I wish more councils would put clear signs up with the age range (e.g. 12 and under, unless you are supervising a child).

When challenging teens, I normally go with the approach that they should be deeply embarrassed to be using an area intended for small kids.

There's a PP being clueless about her teen child being told off for merely "having a chat on the swings". That's not what the playground is intended for, so the teenage DD was in the wrong. I would have also called out teenagers doing this.

From my own experience, teens "Having a chat", on the swing normally involves swearing within earshot of young kids. It also obstructs access to the swings for children who actually want to play and creates an intimidating and scary environment for young kids in the playground.

My DS will be a teen someday, and he will be getting stern words from me if he ever obstructs small kids from being able to enjoy playgrounds.

*There's a PP being clueless about her teen child being told off for merely "having a chat on the swings". That's not what the playground is intended for, so the teenage DD was in the wrong. I would have also called out teenagers doing this.

From my own experience, teens "Having a chat", on the swing normally involves swearing within earshot of young kids. It also obstructs access to the swings for children who actually want to play and creates an intimidating and scary environment for young kids in the playground.

My DS will be a teen someday, and he will be getting stern words from me if he ever obstructs small kids from being able to enjoy playgrounds.*

I don't see the post from the 'clueless' person, but I would like to ask, do you think teenagers should never be allowed on swings or just under certain circumstances? Do you have a problem with teenagers using the swings in a non-fenced off (i.e. clearly for very young children), non-age-signed area where they are not swearing?

I imagine you will not find out if your teenager is obstructing younger children...unless you intend to be there as well.

Signage wouldn't help @MaybeOneAndDone , our local park has 3 areas clearly marked for use for older children (skate park, adventure playground) and adults (fitness equipment) and both are constantly used by small children (watched by their adoring parents).

Teenagers are constantly marginalised and pushed out of public spaces and it needs to stop. Until they provide separate facilities then playgrounds are for everyone.

Yes. This. Teenagers being castigated for playing football. Whatever next!

I know some are horrid and badly behaved and they are not little and cute any more. But honestly when your kids are teens you massively soften. They are still young and daft and are the apple of someone’s eye. Your child will be 13 one day.

And no I am not a parent of feral teens myself mine are well behaved but some of my friends are and they are doing their best. It’s not an easy life stage for anyone. Cut them some slack!

That's fucking hilarious. Ive never seen small kids on the skate park and no one goes on the fitness equipment, But it wouldn't matter to the teens in the op, they were just kicking a ball about so they'd be fine on the grass

Isn't the point that the kids area was right next to the park that had loads of space for a kick about?

I don't get all this weird defensiveness that the teens are being told off for playing football, when they weren't. They were being asked to play football in the big open space right next to then instead of at the head height of the younger kids on the play equipment...?

Exactly, not to mention they sounded extremely rude as well. Inwould nw horrified if my DC acted like these teens.

Could it be that your experience is not universal @MakesMeFeelSad ? There's quite a lot written about the marginalisation of teenagers in public spaces if you take a look.

Anyone would think the poor things had a choice of the play park or the road the way people are going on

Well done. Very few people are brave enough to stand up to this kind of behaviour and it gives the kids who do it the idea that they are untouchable. We get this all the time at school- kids who have not been taught to have any consideration for others and an attitude of ‘make me do it if you can’. Anecdotally it is getting worse. The attitude is very much ‘fuck everyone I don’t need them’.

I can also tell you from experience that teenaged boys can kick a football hard enough to knock out teeth and knock someone out. That is apparently part of the fun for some of them.