Why are single people looked down on so much?

[IsThereAnEchoInHere]

It just doesn’t make sense to me?
Why do people care so much?
It’s one thing if they want or can’t live without a relationship, but why do they impose it to others?

I'm a 40 year old single mum of 2. Have been single for 9 years and people don't look down on me quite the opposite. Alot of people are jealous of my life as I don't have to please an overgrown child!

You know, I haven't been single in a really long time but I have noticed that men and women with an anxiety type attachment to their partners do look down on single people. The more comfortable the single person is in their situation, the more uncomfortable it makes them.

The idea of being single is their worst fear and therefore it is unfathomable that their single friend is truly happy. They are either intimidated by how happy you are on your own or think you're putting on a show.

Clearly it’s because cooking sucks for just one person.

I've never experienced this. What specifically are you experiencing OP?

They aren’t. You just think they are……

Are they? I admire them.

I think some older people from a different generation especially judge single people. but people of my own age - not really.

Genuinely I’m completely surprised by these comments.
First I thought it was just coupled-up people denying it, confirmation bias and all that.
(All the what do you mean etc)
Even more suprised to read other single’s not noticing it as well.

How old are you, OP?

I noticed this a lot in my 20s: the sneery remarks from people who married young, and being excluded from invitations "because it's for couples". Now in my 40s (and still single and always have been) and I find people no longer ask, or try to push me into dating people. It's much better!

I'm not single OP but have made some choices not usually shared by the majority of people.

And many judge. I believe most are used to following the crowd and someone taking a different path in life and not validating their choices scares them or makes them uncomfortable somehow.

Humans are social creatures, we need the herd for survival and all that. I believe it's programmed in our genes as a species

They are seen as lacking or a bit odd, deeply lonely etc.
I know this because I am a single woman in my late thirties and been fielding off comments for years. Some people act like times have changed and it isn't a big deal or a need to be coupled up but they really haven't. Single women are still looked down upon and viewed with suspicion when they say they are not looking for anyone.

I was single for nearly a decade and didn’t notice this. Bar the occasional “are you seeing anyone” I didn’t feel I was treated any differently. I have a partner now but still no plans to marry or have kids and don’t feel I’m treated any differently because of that either

I don't think that being concerned that people might think something actually means they do think it?

And often the threads about going to something solo are less about worrying what others will think, even when that's what the poster says, and more about having the courage and confidence to do something alone for the first time, because they have grown up in a society where women don't really do these things on their own.

Because couples remember the bad days of being single and they are desperate to avoid going back there

Plus consider the language used

"Happily married"
"We are pregnant"
"Couple goals" (seriously I know people who promote themselves with this)
Nowhere else does buying a ring involve a party unless your a couple getting engaged

It's the "we" people never the "i" people to be single means changing your language around

Your always #blessed to have your partners help and support "I don't know what I would do without them" (hint you would cope)

I think there is a certain type of woman, the one who has always been in a relationship since her early teens, who defines her self worth by “being wanted”, and therefore being better than “not being wanted”. Single women are a threat, because they want to “take her man away”, but at the same time, “wanted woman” feels good about herself because she “has achieved more” than single women.
I’d also say these women cluster together, wear lulu lemon exercise gear, have bouncy hair and lunch. But that would be generalising.
everyone else doesn’t care

Er…they’re not. Where have you got this from?

Noticed what though? Several posters have asked you but you still haven’t said how this ‘looking down’ manifests. I’ve been single pretty much 25 years with no real interest in being anything else. What have I missed? What have people done that I should have realised was them ‘looking down’ on me?

You do? My sister is single by choice - not interested in a relationship or dating. I don't think anyone looks fine on her or treats her as a second class citizen.
I'm on my own as I'm a widow. I haven't intentionally not had a relationship, but I have been single since my husband died 14 years ago. No one looks down on me, or if they do they are hiding it pretty well! I'm certainly not treated as a second class citizen.
You are going to have to give examples of what you mean.

I’m happily married and in the nicest way, I do wish for single people to find love and companionship (in whatever form). But only because I remember the pain and loneliness of being single in my twenties. I certainly don’t ‘look down’ on single people. In my secret fantasy life I’m single and having a ball! I envy their freedom and opportunities.

Yeah. We don't need your wishes @Screamingabdabz . It's patronising. Not everyone dreams of being rescued by Prince Charming to complete us.

But why do you wish for that? Do you know that's what they want?

I'm perfectly happy on my own. I've got good friends for companionship. I've got my DC. I don't want/need anything else. (Unless David Tennant knocks on my door)

I think as you get older this is less of an issue. In 20s and 30s people are marrying, having kids, buying houses together etc and there is a bit of don't get left behind pressure! But once you're mid 40s upwards, there are lots more divorcees, some widowers, and not all people are interested in coupling up again. In fact, not coupling up is clearly a good idea for some us 😂

I don’t care if someone is single or not, personally but I see from general life that it really does bother some people.

I don’t know why it does. Perhaps there is an element of envy at the freedom because their own lives feel small and co-dependent.

People see getting married as an achievement. That’s why they look down on single people.

I do wish for single people to find love and companionship

How fucking patronising