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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Man lying on grass outside

213 replies

ChekhovsMum · 30/05/2023 15:57

So there’s a man lying flat on his back on the grass opposite from my house.
I saw him as I drove home, walking with the aid of two crutches (not elderly - I would put his age at mid-40s), then just as I pulled into my driveway he appeared to collapse to the ground, although if I had to guess, it looked like a deliberate decision, not a giving-out of his limbs, IYSWIM.
I parked, went up to him and asked if he was okay - did he want me to call anyone, get him some water etc? He said he was fine and didn’t need anything, with an attitude that suggested it was weird of me to ask.
20 minutes later, he’s still there. I can see him from the window. My guess is that he’s drunk, although he didn’t come across that way when he spoke.
I don’t really want to go back out because I’m home alone, and although it’s a residential street most people work very conventional hours around here, so there is a chance of not being seen/heard if I felt unsafe.
I can imagine this happening when I lived in London, but this is a very family-oriented residential area in a leafy town and it just seems so bizarre.
WWYD?

OP posts:
Andanotherone01 · 30/05/2023 15:59

Do you need to go out again?

Speermint · 30/05/2023 15:59

I’d call 111 and report it to local police. They will come by and sort it out.

Timeforabiscuit · 30/05/2023 15:59

Leave him to it! You've done more than the vast majority would have done on checking on him :)

greennotepad · 30/05/2023 16:01

Is he not just... laying out in the sunshine?

Coralsunset · 30/05/2023 16:01

Just ignore him, you have done enough.

Postbox87 · 30/05/2023 16:02

I'd leave him to it if he's said he doesn't need help

PimpMyFridge · 30/05/2023 16:02

greennotepad · 30/05/2023 16:01

Is he not just... laying out in the sunshine?

That's what I thought.
Man is lying on the grass and says he's fine.
What on earth could need to be done!?
Police 🤣

Fiddlerdragon · 30/05/2023 16:03

Speermint · 30/05/2023 15:59

I’d call 111 and report it to local police. They will come by and sort it out.

Sort what out? A man lying down on the grass? I had this by mine the other day. He had a rucksack with him and I thought he was homeless at first. I went out to see if he was ok and it was a man delivering leaflets, he was hot and tired so literally just lay down on the grass for a rest. How is he actually bothering you?

MayBeeJuneSoon · 30/05/2023 16:03

He's doing nothing wrong

What an over reaction!

Original poster
ChekhovsMum · 30/05/2023 16:04

greennotepad · 30/05/2023 16:01

Is he not just... laying out in the sunshine?

He’s wearing a thick black tracksuit and it’s not sunny, but I like your sleuthing approach. Another woman has just gone to him and had presumably the exact same conversation that I did.
I don’t need to go out again until I pick up DS from nursery at about 5.30, but I had a rare day off everything today and was hoping to do the front garden. I don’t really feel comfortable to do that now.

OP posts:
DisquietintheRanks · 30/05/2023 16:06

If he seemed lucid when you spoke to him why not take him at his word and leave him be?

Littleroseseverywhere · 30/05/2023 16:06

He’s just having a lay down. I don’t think he’s planning to attack you…if he was, it would be an odd way to gather his thoughts…😂

NoBiscuitsLeftInMyTin · 30/05/2023 16:06

Me may well be pissed, bit if he’s not causing any problems I’d let him have a nap and he’ll toddle off in an hour or two.

greennotepad · 30/05/2023 16:06

You can lay outside in any kind of clothes.

Unless there is a drip feed coming that he has one hand down the front of his tracksuit bottoms, it's weird that you feel you can't go out into your own front garden.

Original poster
ChekhovsMum · 30/05/2023 16:06

I think calling the police would be a bit much, but doing nothing seems a bit… little? What if he’s still there in an hour? two hours?

OP posts:
Polari · 30/05/2023 16:06

ChekhovsMum · 30/05/2023 16:04

He’s wearing a thick black tracksuit and it’s not sunny, but I like your sleuthing approach. Another woman has just gone to him and had presumably the exact same conversation that I did.
I don’t need to go out again until I pick up DS from nursery at about 5.30, but I had a rare day off everything today and was hoping to do the front garden. I don’t really feel comfortable to do that now.

Show quote history

Why not?
Just get on with your day, he’s a man not an alien.

MayBeeJuneSoon · 30/05/2023 16:07

I genuinely don't understand your problem Ip??

Get out in your garden and do what you want to!

DisquietintheRanks · 30/05/2023 16:08

ChekhovsMum · 30/05/2023 16:06

I think calling the police would be a bit much, but doing nothing seems a bit… little? What if he’s still there in an hour? two hours?

What if he is?

Dulra · 30/05/2023 16:08

ChekhovsMum · 30/05/2023 16:04

He’s wearing a thick black tracksuit and it’s not sunny, but I like your sleuthing approach. Another woman has just gone to him and had presumably the exact same conversation that I did.
I don’t need to go out again until I pick up DS from nursery at about 5.30, but I had a rare day off everything today and was hoping to do the front garden. I don’t really feel comfortable to do that now.

Show quote history

Do your front garden you'll be fine if he was planning to do anything he'd have done it by now 🙄
I'm assuming he's on public land not bothering anyone he should be posting on here about two ladies bothering him when he's trying to take a nap 😂

Wildlyboring · 30/05/2023 16:08

This is peak Mumsnet. Leave the poor bloke alone and get on with your day.

RegimentalSturgeon · 30/05/2023 16:10

What if he’s still there in an hour? two hours?

You could try ”Get up, you’re killing the grass!”

Wyndam · 30/05/2023 16:10

Call the police there is a man existing.

MayBeeJuneSoon · 30/05/2023 16:10

Wildlyboring · 30/05/2023 16:08

This is peak Mumsnet. Leave the poor bloke alone and get on with your day.

Isn't it just!! 😂

Original poster
ChekhovsMum · 30/05/2023 16:10

Fair enough - no, I don’t think he’s planning to attack me and no, I also don’t think he’s doing any harm. Perhaps I just haven’t lived in places where this happens regularly, and my instinct is generally to help people when they fall to the ground in front of me, but I’ve never been told that they’re fine and then had them stay there. I will leave him be.

OP posts:
BusMumsHoliday · 30/05/2023 16:11

If he's lying on a public area (i.e not someone's garden) and he's not harming or harassing anyone, leave him be. You've asked if he's ok. He says he is. Your job is done.

If you want to do your garden and his presence makes you feel unsafe, take your phone with you. If he's on two crutches, he's unlikely to beat you on a sprint to the door.