not to share my table at outdoor cafe

[ShirleyEyeRosebud]

Went to my favourite cafe with my lovely dog for a relaxing Sunday morning brunch fry up.
All the tables were occupied, so we stood feeling a bit self-conscious waiting for about 20 minutes for a table to become free. In the meantime, a kind couple did ask if I wanted to share their table, but I didn’t want to disturb their relaxing morning so I said thanks for the offer but it’s ok.
So, eventually a table became free so I left my bag there to reserve it and went inside the cafe with the hound to order. When I was queuing up to order a woman asked if I had finished with my table so I said no I have just arrived. She then said are there many of you (obviously not) or can we share your table?
I said Sorry I have been waiting for a table and I would rather have it to myself.

AIBU?

If it was the type of cafe where table-sharing was the norm then I wouldn’t go there at all. I have never seen table-sharing there and I am a regular. As I said previously, most of the tables were occupied by couples.

I get what you mean about feeling more comfortable if you was with someone yourself.

Hard to explain why but yes it would make me feel more awkward if I was by myself.

So on that basis - YANBU

Oh yeah, I mean the people insisting you should have shared, not @jazzandh 😊

Absolutely, maybe some places this sort of communal table behaviour is standard. I wouldn’t frequent those establishments. My barometer is “would this happen in The George at Stamford”, and I’m fairly confident it wouldn’t.

Exactly. To be honest I’d be happy for them to take the actual chairs……and carry them away from me…..they can sit in the middle of nowhere without a table if they’re that desperate for food that they can’t wait.

I think that’s a somewhat unusual barometer

I'm with the OP, although to be honest if it was that busy I'd have swervd the whole place!

That wouldn’t work so well in this case though as the table and seats are screwed together!

The George at Stamford sounds like my kind of place

Because we are not pigs at a trough

Er, no? How on earth is sharing a table equivalent to eating from a trough? If you eat with your family, is that also eating at a trough?

You wouldn’t expect to do that in a top restaurant so I don’t see the difference here.

Simple. You aren't in a 'top restaurant'. You are in a coffee shop.

Same way as you don't tend to leave your bag on a table in a top restaurant while you queue up to pay for your food. 🤦🏻‍♀️

I wasn’t expecting a 20 minute wait but once I started waiting it was hard to know when to give up. I think I was just unlucky with the timing as no one was waiting before or after me

I think finally the "normal" people (ie not picnic table / about to expire from lack of food bandits) have appeared 😅

If you want to use that analogy, I wouldn’t expect my neighbours to rock up at our family dining table just because there were spare seats

Er, no? How on earth is sharing a table equivalent to eating from a trough? If you eat with your family, is that also eating at a trough?

Eating with family members is generally more enjoyable and not the same experience as being forced to eat with entitled greedy strangers with poor manners, an inability to wait their turn, and no impulse control. Strangers (who got to the table before you rocked up) generally don't want to cozy up and break bread with you. However much you insist they should.

Thanks, very well put

Glad you agree with each other

It is on cf level of behaviour as those people who sit on the outside seat of on the train and then refuse to let anyone use the inside seat when there are no other seats available. If there are seats available then people should use them, you don't get to a bag a big picnic bench to yourself thats just awfulyl selfish.

I'm just thinking you're lucky you didn't get your bag knicked!

I'm with you Op. If the cafe owner was wanting to maximise covers they would install a variety of table options. Single dining spaces are rare and in a cafe with only picnic tables as an option - you are as entitled to that table as much as the next person ... or 6 persons.

Well said. If you're that socially inept you can't cope with sharing a table, stay at home

No not the same at all. Sitting on a train or bus next to strangers is considered the norm.

Strangers forcing themselves next to you at your dinner table is weird and inappropriate behaviour. Be an adult. Deal with that poor impulse control. Wait for the next table.

I wouldn’t expect my neighbours to rock up at our family dining table just because there were spare seats

You're being really silly now. (And I did have sympathy with your position initially, albeit not accepting it was ok to occupy a 6 seater table when someone wanted to share)
If the above scenario happened, it would be weird. Because it's your home, and private (unless you invite said neighbours in, and then what? It's like a trough all over again?). However the cafe was a business, open to all. You had a right to any available seat, as did the other paying customer.

I appreciate you're on the wind up so won't bother trying to address the hyperbole!

😂

Perhaps they should meet for a coffee? And share a table? 😜