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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be pissed off with these two women...

140 replies

teanntoastinbed · 26/05/2023 22:49

I was out for an early dinner in a local restaurant with my toddler. We were sitting in the garden, when two women and their young children came In. As is normal there was a little bit of chit chat and interaction.

There was something slightly awkward and odd about them but I couldn't put my finger on it. One of the women was more 'friendly' than the other and was asking a lot of questions... I'm fairly sociable so ended up disclosing I was a single mother and worked full time. I then asked if they were sisters, but apparently they were friends who had met through church. The penny only dropped after one of them asked me if I had a faith and I said I was CofE and then she started to explain their religion to me and how their church didn't allow women to wear trousers and would I consider a change of faith. I was brutally honest and said I had very liberal views and would never contemplate a faith that didn't share my liberal views or persecuted people because of their sexuality or lifestyle choices.

One of the ladies then continued to talk about homosexuality being sinful and how only god can save you and it is only god who can allow you into heaven! Luckily the waitress came over with the bill and I said my awkward goodbye and left. However, now I've had time to think about it I am really pissed off with these two blatant Jehovah's Witnesses, who were basically only chatting to me to brainwash me jnto their way of thinking. I am in no way vulnerable or susceptible to people like this, but many are. I hate the fact that they only started talking to me because they obviously wanted to bring the conversation round to religion! I'm well aware my opinion sounds anything but liberal, and I'm all for a chat about religion but not one that is forced down my throat in a restaurant I'm paying money to eat in and with people speaking in derogatory terms about marginalised groups! Phew... rant over!

OP posts:

Original poster

teanntoastinbed · 27/05/2023 06:55

@AintNobodyGonnaStopMyShine this made me laugh out loud.

Thanks everyone for your comments and agreement. I'm not sure if they were JW, I ignorantly just assumed! They acted livery brainwashed and weird so it could have been an actual cult they belonged to - who knows!

@BigChesterDraws ah I wish I had the energy and imagination to make something like this up! Sadly I have neither with a two year who still doesn't sleep!

OP posts:

wildfirewonder · 27/05/2023 06:55

I think most people who initiate a conversation with a stranger generally have an agenda This is nonsense. Humans are social animals. The only agenda for most is being sociable!

Original poster

teanntoastinbed · 27/05/2023 06:56

@Chickenkeev totally agree! I didn't sit their passively and pushed back when they started spouting off about same sex relationships being wrong! This is when the bill came and made my excuses and left (perhaps divine intervention 😂)!

OP posts:

Kokopenny · 27/05/2023 06:57

Mormons ? I live close to a temple and there’s lots of missionaries around here

Chickenkeev · 27/05/2023 07:01

teanntoastinbed · 27/05/2023 06:56

It's the worst when you're innocently going about your day and you get stuck with some zealot! It's awkward AF to extricate yourself and you end up mulling it over ad nauseum. Or maybe that's just me 😂

Rainbowsandfairies · 27/05/2023 07:01

Here here! Humans are indeed social able!
These women were out of order. You should be able to enjoy a meal out in peace without getting 😔 grief !!

Original poster

teanntoastinbed · 27/05/2023 07:07

God knows! I wish I'd asked them what their church was now haha! I did find it ironic that one popped away for a quick vape! (She was the one that was really pressuring and preaching to me)! Her other friend, seriously look like she'd been brainwashed by the other woman! I just found it funny when I said I was CofE I thought they'd leave me alone but that wasn't OK for them!

OP posts:

Chickenkeev · 27/05/2023 07:12

teanntoastinbed · 27/05/2023 07:07

For some people it's never enough. I'm not religious (tbh anti religion) but lots of my nearest and dearest are. We all respect each other and just don't go there. And we all get along grand, just as fellow humans. I absolutely cannot stand people trying to 'convert' people.

Emmamoo89 · 27/05/2023 07:23

Catsmere · 27/05/2023 04:29

Jehovah’s Hitnesses sounds perfect 😆

🤣🤣

SparklyPinkBalloon · 27/05/2023 07:26

I thought they were wanted to recruit you into an MLM, but it’s pretty much the same thing 😂

Runningslow · 27/05/2023 07:29

There used to be an annual Jehovah’sWitness convention near to my house. I was always impressed by how stylish most of them were. ( not relevant to your post though)

Lightsgoingout · 27/05/2023 07:30

They remind me of Mormons I met in American near SLC.

Just ignore them, I like people to have religion but strongly believe it shouldn’t be imposed on others. However not everyone plays by that rule.

SchoolShenanigans · 27/05/2023 07:32

I'd feel sorry for them, what a wasted way to live. Deep down I'd suspect they're probably deeply unhappy.

determinedtomakethiswork · 27/05/2023 07:36

How ridiculous to believe in a God, who could care less about whether you are wearing trousers or not! When you think of all this is going on in the world that any kind of God could be bothered with, why on earth would he or she be worried about whether a woman or trousers or not. It reminds me of my own Catholic upbringing, where we were told it was a sin not to wear a hat to church. Change of pope and it's no longer a sin...

MyFaceIsAnAONB · 27/05/2023 07:38

Plymouth Brethren are around here - there’s a church a few streets over and a conference Center thing for them too (v secretive but that’s totes what it is). Anyway my point being that I have never once been approached by one or even ‘seen’ one out an about - I obviously have walked amongst them, but they must just look normal not in unusual garb or with a weird vibe as OP described. So not sure if PB would be correct in OP’s circs!
I had never heard about PB until we moved here so if it is them perhaps you’re near me OP 😄

morbidd · 27/05/2023 07:39

God this reminds me when I was at the park with an ex just minding our own business. We were watching the cutest lot of ducklings when we were approached by two women.

We chatted about how sweet they were along with animals in general, when all of a sudden they started their god is life spiel at me.

When I responded with my views as an atheist, one woman had the cheek to look at me and claim I was very mentally disturbed and only god could save me.

I felt rather like I had been conned and taken advance of at the time. I guess this is some new tactic, to catch you off guard.

nocoolnamesleft · 27/05/2023 07:42

I actually quite like being nobbled by JWs: I tell them that my life was saved by a blood transfusion, that I have saved lives with blood transfusions, and that I have no intention of stopping prescribing them where necessary. They tend to recoil in horror and disappear quickly.

Yetisrus · 27/05/2023 07:45

I live in a small block of flats and it seems that JWs, chuggers and all sorts have worked out that during the day they can just let themselves in by pressing the button (it's on a timer for the postman). I work from home, and I seem to get people knocking on my door all the time trying to peddle their religious crap or their bleeding heart stories. Wish they'd keep their views to themselves.

Simianwalk · 27/05/2023 07:49

JudgeRudy · 26/05/2023 23:27

I think most people who initiate a conversation with a stranger generally have an agenda. Even the ones that say 'l was just being friendly' are often bored/nosey/curious.
These women want you to join their religion. Maybe that bloke fancies you, maybe this person is mentally ill, maybe that person wants to offload....l wouldn't find these people any more or less aproblem than any other random stranger imposing themselves on me. Having said that I'm not averse to being blunt. I find the best line to get rid of people is 'Why are you telling me this?'

Strange attitude. I often strike up conversations. I've made some of my best friends doing this in various situations. I like people, like meeting new people and having lots of friends. Obviously lots of the people I chat to aren't going to become a friend but they might.
We have quite a few Mormons and Jaws around here though and I avoid them like the plague. Fuck off trying to indoctrinate me with your bullshit.

Treaclemine · 27/05/2023 07:49

I think some of you are confusing Plymouth Brethren with Exclusive Brethren, with the headscarves. PB, where they are are less likely to be observed by dress, and actually allow women to take part in services, which EB don't. These women don't sound like either. Funny they raised trousers as an issue. I would have taken that as a pointer to say I wasn't interested, as any rule about women, dress, hair, hats, submission to husband, etc shows a very petty deity who's regretting making women equal to men.

x2boys · 27/05/2023 07:50

loislovesstewie · 27/05/2023 06:46

I'm always a Buddhist when they call. I start to quote the sayings of Buddha to them. Makes it quite interesting. But I have recently written to the Kingdom hall telling them not to contact me, after they started sending letters during lock down. I know that doesn't help you, but it does irritate me, the way certain religious cults have to invade my privacy and personal space. And, as you say,you might be a vulnerable person.

You could just not answer the door or say no thanks .

x2boys · 27/05/2023 07:56

determinedtomakethiswork · 27/05/2023 07:36

how old are you?
I had a Catholic upbringing too in fact I went to.a convent primary school,I'm 50 this year th i
I never heard it as a sin to not to.wear a hat?

Maireas · 27/05/2023 07:57

Yes, @x2boys , we had to cover our heads at mass until Vatican II. I had a lovely black lace mantilla.
We still wore them ar school masses for years.

Bedtimemode · 27/05/2023 07:58

"I think most people who initiate a conversation with a stranger generally have an agenda. Even the ones that say 'l was just being friendly' are often bored/nosey/curious."

I don't think that's true, DP will chat to anyone who stands still long enough and he's not at all nosey. He just can't stop talking.

There's loads of JWs around here, I had one get her young daughter to knock on my door recently. That was annoying. How do you tell a small child to go away / you think her religion is twaddle?

Reality · 27/05/2023 07:59

I feel like the JW lot have become more liberal or something lately?

I work in the town centre and they have a stall set up on market days, but they don’t approach people. They come in to my place for coffee and I chat to them; they’ve never once tried to lecture me and one of the guys said he’s not into converting people, his wife isn’t a believer. I didn’t think that was allowed. Very different from the doorsteppers of years ago.

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