what a surprise..it has started!

[momager1]

long story, short.
husband and I took early retirement and sold our home in Canada. 7 weeks ago we moved to a condo that we had purchased previously (for our retirement) In Dominican Republic. 3 min walk to gorgeous bavaro beach, lots of quirky little eateries, Small condo complex but upscale with two large pools and 2 bbq gazebos with included gas bbqs and dining tables for the owners to use. SURPRISE. 3 couples that we have not had alot of socializing with have all sent messages this week. 1 looking to stay a week in august, 1 a week in October, and the other couple want to bring their two kids over CHRISTMAS!! I need to figure out a good response to them all. I did want to message back FUCK OFF but my husband thought it was a bit harsh haha. Couple one have always been good hosts as have we on the rare occasion that we have been in each others house ( and good dinner guests, including asking what they can bring and when i say nothing, they showed up with flowers and two bottles of wine as they didn't know what i was cooking, so a red and a white) Couple Two. had them over for a bbq once. nice enough people that lived in our culdesac, but showed up empty handed and then asked for some of the leftovers as she didn't have time to make anything for their packed lunches the next day (it was a lunch bbq over at 5 pm) Couple three. JUST NO. In the message they sent they said that they know it is just two bedrooms two baths, but the kids could sleep in the livingroom and share THEIR bathroom. And they were so looking forward to my cooking for the week as they are not in a position to eat out much !! ( I am a NOW RETIRED restaurant owning chef. NO NOPE NOPITY NOPE.
So. How do I word my messages back to them that does not include FUCK OFF ?

Send them this, then block!

Can you do AMA on living in DM?
I would love to know more!
Fuck the CF's!

So does @Verv get a catered holiday with you now, as a thank you 😁

So now CF3’s children can have the Christmas presents they really want, rather than just been taken away somewhere and told that’s all they’re getting.

A lot of these replies seem funny on an internet forum but nobody is going to actually say this. It would be better to write a bland and neutral reply that simply makes it clear that staying with you is not an option.

Good response. Healthy boundaries established with them. You mentioned the restaurant. Does that mean you transferred it to your dd? As they’re customers, there may be fallout in Canada.

Can't wait for couples 3s response. DEspite how many CFer stories I read on here I am still dumbfounded at the absolute gall of some people.

Agreed. But I think op has sent the text. I would have texted “I can’t help you there unfortunately. We aren’t available for guests.”

my poor daughter is so very nervous now as she has them booked for a table of two tonight in restaurant. She knows they are going to try to make her talk to me! lol. For Clarity. I have sold the restaurant. But my daughter was my GM and part of the deal was that she stayed on as GM for at least 18 months. The new owners are paying her far more than we did (but... she ate for free and took whatever she wanted home. usually including a case of beer for her husbands days off lol.) We paid her a decent wage that she was happy with , we just negotiated much higher for her to stay on. I just told her to say, Sorry I do not know my parents business down there and I have no influence as SOOOO many people are looking for free holidays from them and they told me to back off and let them handle it. Does that sound ok?

@momager1

She asked me to reconsider as I was massively letting down the children (9 yrs and 11yrs old) Said she already has spent hours researching the area and there are so many beaches the kids want to snorkle at , and there is a new theme park called Katmandu that they promised the kids they could go to as their one big treat

How about:

"We're astonished you'd just assume that we would agree that our home could be overtaken by you and your children or that we'd run a free bnb service for you all from our retirement home. It is entirely your responsibility that your children are disappointed not to come and visit and rude of you to try and pressure us in changing our minds. Please don't contact us again as we won't be responding." 🌹

I don’t know how you deal with it but can tell you about a similar situation. Years ago our friends moved to a remote part of uk not particularly tourist destination and only 2 couples (us and 1 other ) kept in touch and visited them. A few years later our friends moved to a sunny country which was a tourist destination and everyone came out of woodwork to try and visit and stay with them.
They had a rule that they would only allow people who had bothered to visit them at their uk remote home to stay with them in new sunny country.
seemed fair to me, only allow your closest friends who you actually like and want to stay, visit you.

Yes sounds fine to me. Wonder if they've booked tonight to badger your daughter specifically?. Your daughter should make sure she's especially busy and stay out there way. Why would anyone try and go where their not wanted?!.

That sounds spot on. These people sound ghastly.

Or a "you expected them to put you up?! Not a chance - even I have to stay in a hotel when I visit, so if they won't put me up, you've not got a hope in hell!"

That sounds fine. Your poor DD.

I am absolutely reeling at the couple who asked you to reconsider after you'd already told them no. Who does that?

This

"Sorry I do not know my parents business down there and I have no influence as SOOOO many people are looking for free holidays from them and they told me to back off and let them handle it."

Your proposed reply for your dd sounds fine, although maybe she could legitimately replace "people" with "cheeky fuckers"

LOL... cf #3 has seen my reply (two blue ticks ) and not responded. I don't think she will till after her dinner at the restaurant

Any chance that I can come and stay for 2 weeks in August?

I think this is perfect. And if your daughter can give an incredulous laugh as she says it even better…..
And if they still keep on, she needs to say look I’m sorry but I’m busy and my parents run their own lives, please excuse me.

Maybe your daughter should add something along the lines of unfortunately because everyone who even vaguely knows my parents has been begging for free holidays they've had to have a blanket no policy to stop feeling taken advantage of. They've told me not to talk to them about it any more because they aren't changing their minds.
Perhaps even add they said if I try to talk to them one more time about letting people get free holidays I can get a bloody hotel when I visit too 😁😁

My daughter just told me that the CF actually called the restaurant yesterday for Saturday reso.. asked the hostess on the phone if my daughter would be there sat night, to which the hostess said NO she is off sat and sunday this week. They then asked if she was working Friday and hostess said yes, so they asked for friday instead. Yes they are looking to railroad her. I am now royally pissed off. screw my husband saying no to FUCK OFF. I am going to have a tea and calm down a bit. Then I am going to send another message saying to leave my daughter alone and she will not be dealing with them at all tonight. UGGGHHH . They called restaurant LAST NIGHT. After I had sent the first response but they didn't reply till this morning to me.

Glad to have helped, they sound like weapons grade CF's!

You won't even host your grandchildren?! I get not wanting to host "friends" but it's quite cold to not host close family.