To wonder what runs through some people's heads sometimes?

[FattyAirways]

I was at a cafe enjoying breakfast. The cafe is big, got around 25 tables in. I was the only one in the cafe. A couple, came in, placed their order at the till and came and sat at the table right beside me! They had 20-odd other tables to choose from. My table wasn't in an enviable position in the cafe, no views out of the window, nothing special about this area in the cafe, yet they chose to do this. Why?

People just gravitate to other people, it most cases it's unconscious.

I've had this too, and almost cried 🤣 pregnant women should be able to use parent and child spaces imo!

That reminds me! Me and DH and the kids were on a 10 day all-inclusive holiday in Spain some years ago (maybe 17 years ago,) and we were staying at a big 12 storey hotel near the beach. So.... we picked our table to sit at for breakfast, and put our drinks on the table, along with our bags, cardigans, and jackets - and mine and DH's phones. All on the table. We went to the buffet line to get our breakfast. Came back 3-4 minutes later, and a family of four Germans - a 50-something couple and their 2 young adult children, were sitting at the table!

Our jackets/cardigans/bags and our PHONES were all on the floor! And the drinks were gone! 2 coffees and 2 cokes. I said 'excuse me. This is our table, and you have thrown all our belongings on the floor. And where are our drinks?'

They completely ignored us. Didn't even make eye contact. On what planet is THIS acceptable behaviour? Utterly shameless. Turns out our drinks had been dumped on a window ledge some 20 feet away from the table.

NOT an attack on German people by the way, and we have met many lovely ones. Just jogged my memory as this post ^ was about a German family. When this happened to us, I was so angry, that it actually ruined my day. I could not fathom how anyone could do this. Such rude and obnoxious and breathtakingly arrogant behaviour!

At least your MIL actually engages with people.

What's the point of just awkwardly hanging around strangers without interacting?

And then they sit in their car doing nothing so you still can't eat your big fat cream bun without then glancing sideways at you.

Eventually you just drive away.....

😂 This thread does seem ripe to rip off for comedy skits.

Its the same with parking. Park right at the end of a car park with empty spaces around....wait a few mins and ta daaa someone wil park right next door!!

It might be a safety thing or just people gravitate to where you are sitiing maybe they think you chose a nice spot.....I always move lol Maybe they even wanted a CHAT!! arrrgh

DH and I have often found on holiday that if we go into an empty cafe or bar, a few minutes later other people start coming in. It’s like they don’t want to go in if it’s empty but feel better about doing so if there is someone else there.

willsmith, I quite like my space too ,but I don’t find other people that irritating just by being near me. I generally choose places away from people in coffee shops if I can be a my kids are annoying. The couple in question were just sat reading a newspaper.

@ThoseDamnCrows · Today 11:07

My MIL does this all the time, she's a true extrovert and needs to constantly be around other people. In a cafe she wants to see what the other diners are eating, does it look good and are they enjoying it? On public transport she wants to listen to conversations, and will happily join in so will always choose to sit very close to other passengers.

Have to say, I would find your MIL's behaviour utterly infuriating. People don't want random strangers sitting next to them and poking into their conversations, joining in, and sticking their twopenceworth it, and wondering if they are enjoying their food. What incredibly odd behaviour. That's not being an 'extrovert,' that is being incredibly weird.

People do this in empty car parks too. Maybe they thought they were just being sociable rather than treating you like a leper.

I feel like the people who do this almost have a sixth sense for who doesn't want them nearby, and it just attracts them more. After masks stopped being compulsory during covid, I kept wearing mine (my mum was on chemo for advanced cancer and if I'd passed covid on to her it would probably have killed her.) Without fail, some twat without a mask would ignore the multitude of other people who also weren't wearing masks, and would plonk themselves down right next to me. I don't know if it was a subconscious thought that "she's being cautious so she's less likely to be ill" but grrrr!

I had this happen alot when travelling at beaches, would walk miles to find a quiet spot, then someone would sit right next to me!!

Often when you go to a cafe or restaurant where you have to wait to be seated they put you right next to someone else, even if it's not busy. Very weird.

I do often park next to people in a car park as it's easier to line myself up, but I wouldn't park next to someone in a completely or near empty car park, only if it's say middling busy. Once someone parked next to me in a completely empty car park so I moved.

It doesn't tend to happen on trains, probably because I am usually going towards London where people may well sit next to you because they know the train will fill up anyway and women will often sit next to women, or slim people next to slim people. But I remember one time a guy made a beeline for the seat next to me in a near empty carriage which was going to get emptier, so I moved. He gave me a "look" but I didn't care, he was being a twotsit.

I have done this before. Got something to eat (when I have been out all day and I am hungry) and gone to the car to eat it. Then some fecker parks next to me, and just sits in their car watching me eat. Weirdos! I actually turn my back so my back is against the driver's door, and facing the passenger door, so the weirdo can't see me.. 😆When I have finished eating, I turn back round and they're gone! Must have got pissed off that they couldn't watch me eating.

Isn’t it pathetic when people don’t have a mind of their own…😂

Two friends got on. One sat next to me and the other sat on the seat across the aisle. It made no sense.

That must have been some kind of wind up, prank, whatever....not normal!

Yeah I agree. Very odd that this poster's MIL always has to see what other people are doing, to make a decision for herself. So weird! 😆

When this happens to me I always move, particularly on public transport. The flocker always looks askance, if not actively irritated when I do it. It’s unfathomable.
DH and I were hiking in the Austrian alps one summer. We got to the top and sat in the most glorious meadow, stunning views, space to have our lunch. We were some way from the path but another couple walked across and sat down next to us. We moved and the look of astonishment on their faces was priceless.
Fish for sure.

I noticed it as a child.. Drove my parents mad..We'd find a deserted place on an emptyish beach, or woodland to sit down and along would come another family and flomp down.

This thread makes me feel a bit sad that people don’t interact more. We are just becoming more and more isolated and cut off in our own self importance.

@takealettermsjones I wasn’t meaning to imply you had been, sorry it came across that way. I’d meant those that are being deliberately and maliciously disparaging about people behaving like people. I don’t understand the need for it, I dislike socialising and being close to others so I simply take myself out of the equation and stay away from places I have a chance of coming into contact with others. I can see it’s a me problem, not a people problem, the vast majority of people on this thread see it as a people problem though despite the fact that they’re putting themselves in that position.

Also, it's nice to be able to have a more private conversation, uninterrupted by other people's wittering or shouting. I much prefer to be able to hear my companion easily rather than trying to make out what they're saying against a background of another conversation.

My most annoying one was when DH & I settled into our usual table in the back corner of a local cafe, then a couple of women came in & they sat at the next table (3 rooms of empty tables available to them, as we were the first customers there). One of them monopolised their conversation, being a bit too loud & cutting out her friend every time she tried to say anything, drawling her words every now & then in her monologue so there was no space for her friend to get a word in.

If I'd known how bad she was going to be, I'd've moved as soon as they sat there.

I would have moved.

I would have said ok, you take this table and moved!