To wonder what runs through some people's heads sometimes?

[FattyAirways]

I was at a cafe enjoying breakfast. The cafe is big, got around 25 tables in. I was the only one in the cafe. A couple, came in, placed their order at the till and came and sat at the table right beside me! They had 20-odd other tables to choose from. My table wasn't in an enviable position in the cafe, no views out of the window, nothing special about this area in the cafe, yet they chose to do this. Why?

I got on the train the other day and I'm so used to it being busy that I sat next to another woman as it was the first space I clocked. I was mortified when I realised there were empty seats, not just other single seats, but doubles. I was too embarrassed to move 😂

It had less to do with the fact they were restricting access, that was more of an illustration of just how ridiculously close they were for the benefit of other forum members.
DW and I were sat opposite one another on a little table for 2 and the other couple were so close that she was actually closer to me than my wife as the tables in the little snug were very close together (they must have had issues because some have been removed now).

I had no desire to 'score a point', the aim was to make them feel uncomfortable enough so they would move and sit at literally any of the other 30-40 tables in the totally empty pub. An open question like that invites them to think about the situation and reassess their choice of seat without me needing to be all unpleasant and say 'piss off' or something similarly direct. For the overwhelming majority of people this is enough to get them to do it and no direct confrontation has to occur. If they make the decision to move themselves out of awkwardness it doesn't create as much of an atmosphere as a direct confrontation.

Obviously if they are in the tiny minority with a significant brass neck then a more direct 'guys, what I meant to say was that we are struggling to understand why you've invaded our personal space so much when we are in an empty pub. We'd appreciate if you move', sometimes does the trick.

If that doesn't work then a loud coughing fit proves very effective these days since covid.

Ive told this on here before, but I once had a woman go nuts at me on IKEA car park because I was sat in the car eating a hot dog and she wanted my space.
Three quarters of the car park was empty at the time, including the space next to me, but she wanted the one I was in.
I didn’t move.

This. So much of the “how mean to say no!!!” comments on this thread scream of female socialisation, the demand on women to Be Kind, to put any random’s wants before their own, to be available as unpaid entertainment/servant/mother at all times, to never, ever say no.

Seriously? Why should they have moved because some thoughtless strangers came and sat right next to them when they had all the bloody pub to choose from? I’m with SW2002 on this one.

For a moment there I thought you were going to say that they sat down at your table! 😂

Maybe I'm a bit odd,but it's my human nature to put distance between myself and people that I don't know! Obviously,there are times when that's not possible. But if went in a cafe where there were dozens of empty tables,and only one table occupied,I wouldn't dream of going and sitting at the table right next to them.

Because it’s rude catsmere to go around and tell people where they can and can’t sit. Surely it’s much more pleasant just to move rather than being rude to people you don’t know.

I disagree, I think the rudeness is unnecessarily intruding on other people’s personal space, let alone requiring them to engage in conversation.

UnwildyRhombus I did the same a few months ago in the garden centre car park

Our car is big and there’s not many around. There was one same colour so I parked next to it for fun. The DC was so embarrassed 🤣

PocketfulOfMiracles · Yesterday 23:37

I wonder if it was the same spoon who ordered me to move?!

I think that the type of person who sits right next to others, in an otherwise empty place is the same who will come up behind you and start reading your email.

Then complain that they were reading it, when you minimise it and also start talking about the subject.

On holiday me and my husband had paid for two sun loungers there were no more available and we had a nice view of the sea. The rest of the sand was empty only the loungers full and a family came and put up a tent right in front of us… the door opened so we could see right in while they were getting changed. I was fuming so my husband asked them to move to the open space less than two metres away in front of no one. I totally get on a packed beach people sitting close etc but not on an empty one.

We're pack animals, it's instinct to congregate.
Some of us can over-ride that, stay rhe hell away from me 🤣

I was enjoying reading this thread yesterday, but couldn't think of any examples in my own life.

Then I went for a quick evening trip to the supermarket. Parked my blue car in an empty car park. Came back 45 minutes later....

I was on an empty bus and a woman sat next to me. I asked her why and she became quite aggressive. Tbf I was really grumpy about it but this was also the summer 2020 - covid was still rife and there was no vax. there was a horrible atmosphere for the entire bus journey and neither of us enjoyed our seats 😂.

Part of me kind of hopes so because the idea there is more than one of them out there is terrifying 😂
this was IKEA Wednesbury. It was a few years ago now but a level of strange I’d never forget.

Ah, mine was in Asda in Benton, she had a Geordie accent...

@Figment1982 🤣🤣🤣

The idiot has also parked in a way that both drivers will have to carefully squeeze between both cars and try to not dink each other’s cars when getting in 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ why would you actually choose to do that!

The gormless people aren't the ones whinging and moaning though.....

They are on this thread.

catsmere, they were sat at a different table, he was the one that came over to their space, talked to them and told them to go away. You can’t get much ruder then that!

On a related note, funny how a B&M always flocks to the side of a Pets at Home 😃

I dont think its self-importance or sad, I think people just want to escape the hustle and bustle of today's busy, modern world where we're all living on top of one another.